Dear readers: This was composed over a period of several days of re-writing, revising, adding and subtracting entire paragraphs, etc., in order to convey my thoughts and conclusions as honestly as possible. I Hope you feel as free reading it as I do after writing it!

I was born in 1937. At that time, Adolph Hitler was in power. He and I had something in common: Both of us were raised in societies which accepted the daily sight of a Jewish corpse, predominantly displayed, as the highest symbol of love. Read that again.

  In parochial school we were told an invisible god's pre-determined Purpose for our lives: "God wants you to serve him on earth and to be happy with him in Heaven. All you have to do is obey his will." Don't worry, WE will tell you what his will is for you and your parents for the rest of your lives. Trust us. (All those "anointed authorities" are STILL making up shit.)

  On my own, over decades, one way I tried to find what differentiated "Christian morality" from my own inherent morality was by seriously reading its scriptures and apologetics. I felt it molesting my reasoning mind and compassion. (For one thing, killing any innocent son is just plain evil.) Christian morality demands my conscience becomes a moral contortionist, so I refuse to surrender my humanity to obey its immorality, irrationality and superstitions.

 We and the children in Nazi Germany were taught the same Christian doctrines: Be obedient, do not question, think, or reason about things. Not HOW do we tell the difference between facts and lies? In the U.S. we indoctrinated kids were taught an "alternative reality" of "alternative facts": a tradition fantasized by  fear-filled superstitious men thousands of years ago. One of those fantasies is "Jesus."

 Our teachers conveniently omitted obvious things in their gospel stories about this Jesus: He bitches a lot, he's impatient, does nothing to avert an impending doom he predicts for his listeners because they don't buy what he's selling. So he's not perfect, just one of many  bitching prophets. But he does much good for humanity. He cures people. The blind see, the deaf hear, the handicapped get to move freely, and so on. It's alleged he brings the dead back to life and feeds thousands of people, cost-free! Nobody gets hurt. 

 Oh, BTW:  What's the PURPOSE of HIS  life? Here's where Christianity, created by Paul of Tarsus, (ta dah!) comes in. Paul demands we accept Jesus's purpose: He was put on earth to  be tortured to death! MACABRE. That's sick and you know it. Paul says we have to idolize a man with Extreme Masochistic Personality Disorder. (As a practical man, I say, "If suicide-by- Roman-crucifixion turns him on, let him go for it. It's his life.") Believers insist: If you only accept that an all-loving and all-merciful father demanded killing him, this guarantees you'll have it all. And well, despite his sermons, most Christians take Paul seriously, not Jesus.

Millions of sincere believers have, and do, accept Paul's interpretation of a man he never met, so why don't you? They can't all be wrong, can they? Don't they tell you, "Look on the BRIGHT SIDE: Jesus  didn't die like, duh! - forever, 'cause he bounced back into life again!"

 So you think, "I'll look for the OTHER  BRIGHT SIDE: NOW he'll prove to the world he really defeated death, no bullshit and no doubts about it. NOW he'll resume doing all the good stuff  before he was killed." What DID  he do? He disappeared, without a trace! What a jerk!

As a child I remember seeing films of children confined in iron lungs, apparatuses that breathed for them when they couldn't. They were victims of polio. Thousands of children got polio, and couldn't walk on their own. A very real Dr. Jonas Salk created the vaccine that defeated the polio virus. He cured more people than that  alleged "Jesus" ever did. Salk asked for no remuneration; it was free to the world. He was honored.

My Czech friend told me an old saying from his native country: "The last to die is hope." In religions, faith, prayer and hope, describe the same thing: gambling. Some die with hope for eternal life, some for theworld to be destroyed soon so they can have it all.  Others die with hope for a better future for their families and friends; still others with hope their lives had made a difference, etc,  etc.  I'm wondering if evolution created  hope, especially false hope when hopeless, as a way to ease all sentient beings into death? Looks that way sometimes.

One sincerely held belief of billions proclaims: when your humanity, your own sense of right and wrong cannot prostrate before "God's wisdom and love," you are EVIL and you deserve to be tortured, like, forever. God has no free will, ergo, no choice: He created Hell, and he enforces the rules. Or will you ignore the immorality and hypocrisy in Christianity and join the many who make a habit of getting "stoned on Jesus?" Is that the purpose of YOUR  life?