As I have stated here before my son has ADD. He's a great kid and the ADD really seems to mess with his patience. He seems to get angrier easily when he is off meds. Though he has gone the weekend w/o it, or forgotten to take it on occasion.

A series of events have taken place over the last couple of weeks (a bit less) that have given opportunity to learn lessons.

My son is sorta at the top of his game right now, good grades, won a few awards and leadership opportunities, doing well socially. So, about 4-5 days ago, he told me he wanted to try going off of his medication over the summer. I reminded him that he has A LOT going on this summer, Fire Academy, 3 weeks of leadership camp and another week at a leadership conference. I told him that things are going so well for him and that it's ok to be on medication if that is what he needs. I told him there is a chemical imbalance, it's not his fault, nor does it reflect poorly on "who he is as a person." So we agreed that he could give it a shot while at home over the summer, but it wouldn't be wise to change what is working while he is engaging in important activities for his future. He agreed.

So, yesterday he turned 17 years old - Yay! I made the fatal mistake of allowing him to have a friend spend the night on a school night.

Today I got a call from school. His math teacher/asst. principal had emailed the receptionist that my son was being very disrespectful and disruptive in class. She felt as though she could handle him, but saw the makings of a very bad day for him. Upon talking to him, she learned he did not take his medication today. So, they were calling to see if I wanted to bring his meds to him.

I thought about it and decided that it would be better for me to talk to him instead. So, they had him call me between classes. When I talked to him, I was calm, not angry at all. I decided to remind him of his goals. I also took the opportunity to remind him that he has a direct affect on other people's day. How he treats his teachers can directly effect what kind of day they were having and that was a responsibility he should take seriously.

I reminded him that he has spoken to me about the kind of person he wants to be (a leader, a scholar). I asked him if he felt his behavior was in line with his goals? I also reminded him of his desire to be off medication. I told him I could not take that request seriously if he could not take his responsibility to be a person others enjoy being around seriously. I reminded him of other requests he had made, and how I could not consider them if he were in this way while at school.

I told him I did not think he wanted to be the kind of kids whose mom had to run to school and give him medication so that he could be liked by those around him. I told him I would bring his medication but asked him if this was really what he wanted, or if he wanted to take a deep breath and think about acting in a way that is in line with his goals. If he was in 8th grade, I told him, I would be up there already. But, as a 17 year old boy making choices for himself, it did not seem like the right thing to do.

He decided to make the day better from that moment forward. We both agreed he would go and apologize to his teacher and move on with the day from there.

I spoke to him after school, before practice, he said the day did get better.

I understand the fact that he is 17 makes this scenario what it is. As I mentioned earlier, were he in 8th grade, I would have driven to school immediately to dispense his meds.

So, I am proud of both of us. I made the decision to not scold him and he made the decision to behave in line with his ultimate goals.

Score one for us!!!