Kubla used to have Bad Dreams a couple times a month. One night he dreamed he was all alone and couldn’t find me or Liping. The next night he was afraid to go to sleep. He found every excuse he could think of to delay going to bed.

“Hey Kubla. Have I ever told you the Secret of the no bad dreams?”
“No.”
“Do you want to hear it?”
“Yes.”
“Do you promise not to tell anyone? It’s a secret.”
“OK”
“Alright. When you feel loved, you feel safe. So you don’t have bad dreams. Here’s the secret—‘I love you so much.’”
“That’s it?”
“That’s it. Do you want to know the secret of the good dreams?”
“Yes.”
“When you love someone else, you feel good inside, so you have good dreams. The secret of the good dreams is to tell someone else, ‘I love you so much.’”

He tells me he loves me so much and dozes off.

Ever since, every night before bed I ask him if he wants to hear the secret of the no bad dreams. I lean in and whisper,“I love you so much.”He then asks me if I want to hear the secret of the good dreams. He whispers, “I love you so much.”

He now only has bad dreams a couple times a year. The secret of the no bad dreams is our favorite part of the bedtime ritual.

What do you do to make your kids feel safe at night? How do you chase away bad dreams?

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