I think a lot about reaching certain goals in my life.. I have written pages and pages about it in my journals./.. I have worked hard at it// I have cried about it.. I have been open-minded.. However, in the end, many of my goals have eluded me (don't you love the passive voice here??). Anyway, I sat down recently and tried to articulate why I think I haven't been successful in the past and what I can do to get different results moving forward..
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There is one OVERRIDDING goal that I got from reading Good to Great- DISCIPLINE OR THE LACK OF ALONG THE WAY.. I don't underestimate the importance of this little trait and I no longer equate it with being neurotic or lacking spontenaeity (sort of how I used to see "morning" people before I came one)..
So, as promised in my previous post, I am including a list (it is shorthand since no one is actually reading it)..
Reasons I haven't reached my goals
• Process & intellectualize conditions
• Too easy on myself at crunch time (but too hard on myself after-the-fact)
• Blame outside factors (eg. Tumor)
• Self-sabotage (eg. Cookies after workout)
• Bad self-image (living to be right about image)
• Stuck on old images/messages about self
• VERY Comfortable
• Focus only on results not process
• Hoping for quick solutions (tied to bullet above)
• Tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow
• Got to have last “hurrah” before start
• Swinging for fences – all or nothing at all
• No belief that change will actually happen
• Lack of internal integrity (strong external integrity – keep promises to everyone but me)
• No back up plans when I mess up
• Not prioritizing important goals over BS time fillers
• No CLEAR, REALISTIC, ATTAINABLE goals/objectives
• I write down goals and never look back (as if writing down takes me off hook)
• NO “non-negotiables”
• No sense of urgency
• No positive reinforcement (esp. from self)
• No rewards
• Waiting for magical epiphany instead of “just acting” just doing it!!
• Never “act as if”
• Feeling like I am “too far gone” to change or reach goal
• Short term thinking
• No support network
• Feeling that I am victim or that things are unfair (eg. It is unfair that some folks get to eat all they want and not gain a pound)
Keys to reaching goals
Establish Realistic and attainable Goals (by the way, changing habits is a goal)
Objectives that will get to goal
Benchmarks & periodic evals.
Periodic rewards (daily if necessary)
Redefine what rewards are (not bad stuff)
Recruit support network
Start NOW, not tomorrow
Make it priority #1
BE SELFISH ABOUT IT
Revel in the process
Revisit goals OFTEN (daily)
Be hard on yourself
Establish Plan B (eg. When you are about to eat something bad for yourself, OD on h2o).
Contingency plans to get back on track if you do mess up “all is not lost”
Change rhetoric and self-messaging to reflect the way you really feel about yourself (treat yourself the way you’d treat a best friend)
Act “as if” you are already at your goal
Recognize that the epiphany is just that.. and change happens in action
START NOW…
• Process & intellectualize conditions
• Too easy on myself at crunch time (but too hard on myself after-the-fact)
• Blame outside factors (eg. Tumor)
• Self-sabotage (eg. Cookies after workout)
• Bad self-image (living to be right about image)
• Stuck on old images/messages about self
• VERY Comfortable
• Focus only on results not process
• Hoping for quick solutions (tied to bullet above)
• Tomorrow tomorrow tomorrow
• Got to have last “hurrah” before start
• Swinging for fences – all or nothing at all
• No belief that change will actually happen
• Lack of internal integrity (strong external integrity – keep promises to everyone but me)
• No back up plans when I mess up
• Not prioritizing important goals over BS time fillers
• No CLEAR, REALISTIC, ATTAINABLE goals/objectives
• I write down goals and never look back (as if writing down takes me off hook)
• NO “non-negotiables”
• No sense of urgency
• No positive reinforcement (esp. from self)
• No rewards
• Waiting for magical epiphany instead of “just acting” just doing it!!
• Never “act as if”
• Feeling like I am “too far gone” to change or reach goal
• Short term thinking
• No support network
• Feeling that I am victim or that things are unfair (eg. It is unfair that some folks get to eat all they want and not gain a pound)
Keys to reaching goals
Establish Realistic and attainable Goals (by the way, changing habits is a goal)
Objectives that will get to goal
Benchmarks & periodic evals.
Periodic rewards (daily if necessary)
Redefine what rewards are (not bad stuff)
Recruit support network
Start NOW, not tomorrow
Make it priority #1
BE SELFISH ABOUT IT
Revel in the process
Revisit goals OFTEN (daily)
Be hard on yourself
Establish Plan B (eg. When you are about to eat something bad for yourself, OD on h2o).
Contingency plans to get back on track if you do mess up “all is not lost”
Change rhetoric and self-messaging to reflect the way you really feel about yourself (treat yourself the way you’d treat a best friend)
Act “as if” you are already at your goal
Recognize that the epiphany is just that.. and change happens in action
START NOW…
