Ok.. I can't pretend I am going to die in 1 year - I just can't! I am too afraid to put that kind of thought/energy/vibe out there in the universe (maybe it'll be Heard too literally and I have too much to live for....). I know... I know... I KNOW.. it is silly. Hey, I didn't know that about myself but it is what it is.. So, I am going to take a little twist on this theme- I am going to act as if I am only going to be here in America/working for the next year and then I am gone - checked out, moved on - living the island life never to be heard from again... LOST BABY LOST..

I have given this thing a lot of thought over this past weekend. Well, as much thought as "I" can give something (consciously)... My wife has been tremendously helpful.. There are a couple of things I know that I want to do (have wanted to do for quite some time). Here is the preliminary list:

1) Start a school

2) Write Book for African American boys

3) Get my children's book illustrated and published

4) Golf project

5) Take immaculate care of myself

6) learn an instrument (guitar)

7) Shoot even par..

Whoa..

The funny thing is that imposing this kind of urgency on myself and my life makes me realize how deeply my disregard for the passage of time runs inside of me.. Also, it has caused me to look in the mirror and face the fact that I don't take myself seriously enough (always the clown). It is OK to have an ego and a little pride!! ( not the same as ego-centric and prideful). Hmmm. Note, that these goals have to do with ME and me alone (I feel pretty good and comfortable with the other "stuff" - fatherhood, being a husband, friend, son, brother, uncle, etc. ) - I will keep working on that important Stuff since, ultimately, that is what I care most about and I feel like that is what I will be judged upon. However, folks in my life have challenged me to do things for myself for once..

So it begins quietly....