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Losing Internet, Now Asking For (Greedy) Broadband

To sum up my week, it was one of those blazing hot Malaysian days where private companies everywhere in Kuala Lumpur put their air-conditioners to minus-bajillion degrees Celsius, making caffeine-powered morning cups form ice cubes by themselves or said drinker becomes an iceberg, whichever freezes first. Indoor plants at the window seat are confused; blooming spring flowers on one branch and growing winter icicles in the other.

But I’m not here to talk about work. As much as I love my neighbour’s router, my conscience is creeping up on me about getting my own internet service provider so I can surf at my own time and discretion (not that I’m planning any online in-discretion anyway, midnight or daylight). After all, there’s only so much waiting and hoping and limited deep-fried crinkle-cut potatoes to keep me company during the waiting and hoping.

Pushing aside my inner-Jiminy Cricket, two factors against me were the more obvious reasons to get an ISP, pronto. Motherly gossip from the Surau Aunties speaks that my neighbour’s son is having major exams this year so there’s no more mindless surfing in the late nights anymore (thus ends one similarity between us, kiddo). So his unsecured router is off on most days of the week and as a result, I’m having Internet withdrawal symptoms.

Internet withdrawal: A pathetic state of mind which an Internet addict goes through when he/she is deprived of all the virtual conveniences of online gaming, surfing, googling/wiki-ing, etc. Symptoms vary from addict to addict but common signs include pacing mindlessly, excessive consumption of unhealthy beverages, blogging, drooling while sleeping, annoying little nephews, blogging, counting ticks in an hour, memorizing the entire works of Tennyson’s, excessive hot showers, blogging…

In between scarping my face off the bedroom carpet and text-messaging CASH to triple-three-double-nine (when the Fly.FM radio says cue to call), my dear, beloved older brother Abang Arsenal called me by my cellphone for the first time in an eternity to ask how’s my internship. The out-of-the-blue “Hello Liza!” was quickly explained when he requested than he wanted his laptop back by the end of April.

What da f---??!!

My baby toy who I have come to depend on during neighbor’s router and McDonald’s food trips turns out to have been misunderstood about the terms after the adoption and now original parent wants it back. I thought it was a gift. Abang Arsenal thought it was a loan. Since that he’s the man who bought the Acer notebook, I have to concise it as a loan.

To concise it further, this means my internet capability will be reduced to utter null after my internship (I had hoped to make regular trips to school before convocation to enjoy school’s wireless). That’s hell on my not-so-new online mmorpg, Celestial Destroyer. I’ve already joined an in-game family and an elite guild, with the emphasis on nighttime play.

They’re all really nice but most of the active players are Singaporeans. Gamers, go figure... (hehehehehehe!)

So! Leaving me with my long-time friend, HP Pavilion PC in the house, I sing to the tune of the primary school kid’s musical team-picking song; “Which-broadband-is-the-greedy-broadband~? Please-go-out-and-buy-your-greedy-broadband~... So-greeddiiiiiiiiie~... Sent-for-OUT! (The song is which-shoe-is-the-dirty-shoe, in case my generation gap is at fault to your confusion).

Said greedy broadbands in question on my mind are big-shots Maxis, Digi and Celcom. In case you’re wondering, Telekom’s Streamyx can’t afford me because I’m too cool to reconstruct my faulty previous home renovation blunder to install a fixed line.


Current name on cellphone chip.



Been considering for a while.



Familial recommendation.


I’m looking for an unlimited broadband on a monthly basis, particularly downloading the upgrades on various softwares I use for work and play, maximum under RM1000 installation fee and hopefully not-so-big penalty fee after I decide to hate the service. After I do more research on these three, I’ll post an update. In the meantime, I do appreciate if you could throw all your ISP frustrations at me so I know what kind of trouble I’m asking for.

So-greeddiiiiiiiiie~...


This post first appeared on Shadow Pimpernel, please read the originial post: here

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Losing Internet, Now Asking For (Greedy) Broadband

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