Yes, and it's back to school for us!
Summer flew by so quickly.
But the kids are excited.

I am well, not very - because that means scheduling conflicts.

Now, Connor gets off at 1pm.

I suddenly have a problem of - do I have lunch before I leave?  or do I have lunch when I get back?
How do I pump my milk for Shobe?  My milk supply has not been outstanding - it has been just enough for Shobe.  My right boob is not working - and so it really frustrates me so much!  I am sad but what can I do right?  I was told to slow down, but how does one slow down - I mean really?  Remember when I slowed down during Holy Week, only to get really really sick?  It was so ironic really - but what was I to do but roll with the punches?

So many crazy things really and I'm starting to adjust.

Add to that - my aunt, the sister of my mom who was recently diagnosed with recurrence of endometrial cancer.  I have been the runner for her and her needs.  I have taken time out to accompany her during her chemotherapy sessions and stays in the hospital.  For the past months, it has been hectic and stressful.  I never thought I would be the same as with the stories I hear for being in the hospital waiting for results, nor running to the Red Cross and Philippine Blood Center to purchase blood and platelets.

I have a new found respect for blood donors, not to mention the wonderful staff in these blood centers that makes blood available for patients.  I have spoken with people from different walks of life who were with me waiting for their blood purchases.  I never thought that one day, I will be needing a pack or more for a loved one.  Donating blood does save lives and I am forever grateful to donors every where.

I never thought too that this journey would be emotionally draining.  It is physically draining, but emotionally - I needed to be available for my loved ones.  My mom, my aunt, my family and my children.  I am thankful that my Panget is understanding of these circumstances - and that my children too are not demanding too much.  I do my best explaining to them why mommy is away a lot of times.  I am thankful and grateful to technology that allows me to be in communication with them with a tap on my phone.  I get to speak to them and see them when I can.

Currently, I have three direct relatives who have cancer.  An aunt and two uncles (one from each side of the family) and this only means one thing - the chances are high of me having cancer.  It's in my genes.  But is it really genetics?  I'm an not sure - some say it is, while some say it isn't.  But one thing I should be is CAREFUL.  But how does one be careful?  I mean seriously, how does one be careful?  I have a friend who's dad runs 2 kilometers a day and never smoked in his life - but contracted lung cancer.  He recently passed away too.  He was quite depressed because, a short time after his diagnosis, he was unable to walk because the muscles in his legs were gone.

Right now, all I can do is pray.  Pray that I be given strength to serve my aunt.  Mental strength, emotional strength and physical strength also wisdom.  I hope you can pray for me in this trying time.