We are about to dig into a book in a way I never have before. Right now, I know of at least 2 'radio pastors' digging into the Book of Nehemiah from different angles. But even before they started, I was being drawn to Nehemiah by God. The reason comes at the very beginning:
Neh 1:1 The words of Nehemiah the son of Hacaliah. Now it happened in the month of Chislev, in the twentieth year, as I was in Susa the capital,
Neh 1:2 that Hanani, one of my brothers, came with certain men from Judah. And I asked them concerning the Jews who escaped, who had survived the exile, and concerning Jerusalem.
Neh 1:3 And they said to me, "The remnant there in the province who had survived the exile is in great trouble and shame. The wall of Jerusalem is broken down, and its gates are destroyed by fire."
I have in my life a Wall broken down, its gates burned with fire. And I went to Nehemiah to find the way to build it back up. And one thing, I didn't have to learn, that I always have known- it will take some time. And dedication- neither of which have I been good with. So at this point I'm going to break down not the story, but the application I am making to Nehemiah. I want to use it to increase my dedication, to write the lessons down in words, and with the Jews of Nehemiah's day, get rid of the rubbish and rebuild what was there from the start. Where does it start? with the wall. This is a wall of protection, of innocence, that wasn't built by my hands in the first place. Remember Joshua?
Jos 24:13 I gave you a land on which you had not labored and cities that you had not built, and you dwell in them. You eat the fruit of vineyards and olive orchards that you did not plant.'
Jos 24:14 "Now therefore fear the LORD and serve him in sincerity and in faithfulness. Put away the gods that your fathers served beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the LORD.
The very city and walls of Jerusalem were a gift from God. So were my walls. I grew up in innocence, safe behind these walls, but then I grew up and had to make a choice:
Jos 24:15 And if it is evil in your eyes to serve the LORD, choose this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your fathers served in the region beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD."
And choices were made, some good, some bad. And so it is with all of us. But so much more subtle: A little slip here, a habit that "can't be a big deal" there. Then a "boy I screwed that up", or an addiction, it changes for each of us, yet it doesn't change. And eventually an enemy forces the gates, the walls are knocked down, your safe place burned. And just maybe, over time, you come to accept it.
If you research the history, the timeline gets a bit screwy, but there may have been as much as a century or more between Cyrus storming Babylon and allowing the Jews to return from exile and the moment of Nehemiah's awakening to the problem. And he had come to accept it. Note that Nehemiah was living in the Capital of Persia, Susa. Why was he there?
Neh 1:11 ... Now I was cupbearer to the king.
Meaning Artaxerxes I, who may have been the Ahasuerus of Esther; I say that because of this curious parenthetical note:
Neh 2:6 And the king said to me (the queen sitting beside him), "How long will you be gone, and when will you return?" So it pleased the king to send me when I had given him a time.
Which would be an unusual thing for a Persian queen to be doing, not to mention an unusual thing for Nehemiah to bring up; but Esther was an unusual queen. Anyway, the point being, Nehemiah is a high and trusted official at the very top of power, unconcerned with life beyond the capital- until Brother Hanani told him what it was like. He now knew: He had a PROBLEM, and he was living like he didn't.
So what does he do?
Neh 1:4 As soon as I heard these words I sat down and wept and mourned for days, and I continued fasting and praying before the God of heaven.
Let me take this apart. Fasting means to give something up. In a situation like mine, it means constantly falling back on this:
Pro 4:23 Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.
Pro 4:24 Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you.
Pro 4:25 Let your eyes look directly forward, and your gaze be straight before you.
Pro 4:26 Ponder the path of your feet; then all your ways will be sure.
Pro 4:27 Do not swerve to the right or to the left; turn your foot away from evil.
It means examining my motives (heart), giving my motives to Jesus to perfect them.
It means watching my mouth- stopping not only the thoughtless expression, but the hurtful words, the stories that need not be told, the gossip not necessary to pass on.
It means watching what I muse on in idle moments, and controlling what catches my attention.
And finally, it means not putting myself in the path of temptation. And it's every day, every moment, and each time you slip, you lose a chunk of the concentration you need to do this.
That's where I've been almost since God first brought me to Nehemiah.
That stems from not being broken enough about the problem. I am not grieving near enough that I sin against an awesome, loving God. I let every excuse get in the way: Being tired, hungry, sad, frustrated, tired of all the ways Satan fights back against the light, just wanting something for ME. Somewhere I heard my particular problem always has bitterness at its beginning. And they were right- bitterness caused by damnable pride from both angles- the "Why shouldn't I?" and the "But I am". Those were the enemies that snuck through the walls and burned my gates.
Next time, I want to focus on the praying Nehemiah did. But before that, one last thing- the time. Nehemiah is very good at lining up the time relative to Artaxerxes reign- not surprising from a high official. And he got the word "in the month of Chislev'- ironically enough, around this part of November- and didn't make his first move outside of praying until "the month of Nisan"- sometime in the spring. Five months of praying and fasting, of total dedication, before God was ready to open his door. Me? I'm creeping up on 50 years of far-from-airtight dedication. My whole life is time. How long I will waste it is the issue.
