How is it in the 40-plus years I've been listening to Christmas music, I've never actually listened to it? Let me explain: It was Black Friday. My mother and I were out and about maxing out our credit cards and throwing elbows for seven dollar waffle irons. After several hours of shopping, my mom faded and dropped out to go home to bed. Wussy. I still had one more stop to make. The worst one of the night -- Kohl's. Gomer had his heart set on giving Hubs a pair of slippers he saw in the flyer...