I’m a little burned out on Talking about how busy life is, which is a sort of hypocrisy, I suppose. I’ve been recoiling from the insistence that we are all so overbooked, so expectedly swamped.
What I’m interested in walking is the line between: deliberately choosing how I spend my time and embracing the inherent frenzy of this life we’ve chosen. There is space there, where these phrases we continually invoke (“life is so crazy right now!”) do not imply punishment. Where the fact that I’ve discovered Aidy has been talking out loud to her narwhal toy for the past half hour in her room, instead of getting her clothes on, which is what I thought she was doing, is amusing, instead of an indication that something is amiss in the organizational structure of our family’s life; something that requires fixing. It just is. She is like that.
What better time, then, to sink into Summer with this year’s list of goals? Because, what I think I’ve always been after is not trying to fill a lacking schedule, but to ensure the schedule retains room for these dalliances…these attempts at achievements. Both.
Gabe is going to sleepaway camp for the first time this summer and recently got into quite a fraught state, asking me how many days he had until he went. He wasn’t worried about going, he said (and I believe him), he was worried about how many days he’d get to spend at our neighborhood pool in total, considering he’d be away for a few weeks and missing precious diving board hours.
“Well, that’s the thing about life,” I told him, “You sometimes have to say no to one thing so you can say YES to another.”
He didn’t appreciate that attempt at philosophy. So I tried again. I told him it was going to be a great summer. We’ll do lots of things, I said, you just can’t do them all at once. And sometimes, it’s very good to do nothing (he doesn’t agree on that point, but 11-year-old boys don’t know what they’re talking about.)
Because the busy life? That just is. But you can flip the narrative on its head.
Not: what did I miss?
But: what did I make time for?
Summer goals 2022:
go paddle boarding
see a musical
take evening strolls with Maisie and anyone who cares to join us
run a 5K with J and the 169 crew
take the fam to Quassy
attend a (or create my own) writing workshop or retreat
go shopping with my mom
finish “Ulysses”
visit Portland (Maine)
have a fancy night out with Aidy
read in the hammock
fill the back patio with pots of flowers
walks (many) with friends
learn the basics of sailing
submit my book of essays to publishers
day trips and afternoon outings: visit Storm King, the Book Barn and a Connecticut beach
get the office attic set up for warmer weather
explore electric cars
go to the movies
write weekly posts
go back to Glidden Point Oysters
happy hour on the Southport rocks, at the pool and at Contois Tavern
use my cookbooks
