The role of a stepmom is a tough one. Not just because of the extra stressors that come with it, and defining your role in a family that was created before you were a thought. But because of the evil stepmom stereotypes, the stigma, and the double standards. When you're a stepmom, society is ready and waiting to pounce at the slightest sign of weakness.

As a stepmom, you need to know when to step up and when to butt out. You need to be a “parent” to the children, you need to be available at the convenience of the parent but never over-step the mark.

 And all of this with a smile on your face, because just one complaint and you’ll be reminded that “You knew what you were getting yourself into.”

Venting about the everyday frustrations that come with regular motherhood is not just acceptable—it’s encouraged. But complain about step-motherhood? Forget it!

When a mother needs a break from her child, other moms understand and rally around her, comforting and encouraging her, when a mother plans vacations without her child, it's good because "she deserves a break". When a stepmom mentions needing a break, has plans without the child, or talks about the hardships of stepmothering, she's evil, selfish, a "fake" parent.

If you ask me, it’s BULLSH*T.

Just like moms, a little vent doesn’t mean we love these kids any less. It just means we’re human beings.

There’s a movement in the online world which has allowed moms to share that parenting isn’t all hearts and sparkles. My hope is that things progress and stepparents are encouraged to do the same. That is why I have this blog segment. This is why I am open about my experiences. This is why I rally for other stepmoms.