Over the years things have changed drastically but, in our society, a tag of working for a woman is always taken as optional. Since ages woman had played many roles in their life. A role of homemaker, freedom fighters, activist and what all you can imagine for the social upliftment or to support a Family. Whether she is single, married or a mother, but ultimately and above all, she is assumed as the primary caregiver to the family.

Women are managing and balancing hard to get her own space with respect which is being missed out at large!

The time has changed, women workforce is everywhere and honestly, I feel proud when I read their success stories. Managing a successful career and a family is not an easy task. This is one of the most challenging part one can do!

Once I met a very old friend of mine after long years but when he asked me what you are into (profession) other than parenting two kids, I was surprised by the immediate note, “Don’t say you are just a housewife”? I was appalled to see why homemakers are taken for granted like they are good for nothing? That means primary caregivers has no value?

The quest for working and Stay -at- home -mom is always at loggerheads. Who is better? Whose children are better? How can a SAHM get her financial independence by depending on her better half? And how can a working mum leave her children to someone else?

There is no dearth of such questions where the ultimate result is just hatred!

I am sorry, I don’t endorse anyone! I support each woman in whatever profession they are and whatever they love to do. It could be anything. l know how to manage, they know their challenges and we all know what’s best for us! So, it’s better we don’t question each other’s choices until they are affecting your own personal life, though it can never!

Personally, I had gone through many phases of life where I had worked, was dependent, self-sufficient, independent, part-time work and all sorts of things which a woman can go through. I remember during my school or college day I used to take some home tuitions so that I can take care of my expenses without burdening my parents. Later this habit of self-earning changed many perspectives in my life and I realised even if you earn mere Rs 500, the joy of spending that Money with all the freedom is always different. I had sensed that moment closely and the peace within.

This self-earning concept worked till I entered the motherhood and I had no choice to quit my career. I was in different phase which I had never planned. On the contrary, that was entirely my decision to take a break and when you have a nuclear family set up.

Down the line, it so happened that I got fully engrossed in the family and didn’t realise where I got lost in between. By the time I realised it was the gap of 8 years to my professional life. There is nothing which I lost or gained as a family, but I lost to myself.

I lost my mental engagement and the financial independence of self-earned money. Though as a family it never happened that I had any kind of restriction to spend money as per my own ways. In fact, I am the one, who swipes more credit card than my husband. I am a shopaholic, but I never enjoyed the same way like I used to enjoy spending peanuts which were self-earned. And I wanted to shift from the tag of SAHM.

A few years back when my health was taking a toll due to this Identity Crises, I found a new light, the light of writing or blogging. Never knew if this was the right calling but I started and found myself liberating through my words. I was in NO race to earn money or to get fame. I knew I had to work, write and need to engage myself on a creative level.

You can say my hard work or perseverance, it all worked out and soon I started shelling out some bucks. Again, the feel of self-earned money kicked in and I was back to my happiness to spend it.

I am not against anyone who is completely happy with managing home, I know this itself is a big task to manage and there is no limit to work until your last breath. But if you think you are missing something in your life then please introspect, and there is no harm in learning things and starting it as new.

I realised there were mainly 5 reasons why I wanted to shift from the tag of SAHM:

1. Identity Crises: There is quite a possibility that you might lose your identity as your own self. In fact, I ‘ve always believed that being a homemaker is always a dignified position but how many people really respect that? There are chances when you feel secluded due to this identity crises by telling someone’s wife, or someone mother. Somewhat, it’s not always required that you need to earn while you work? It could be anything, like social work, singing, dancing, yoga and using your creativity. Everyone is special in their own term and the only thing you need to change is your outlook towards yourself.

2.Mental Engagement: I’ve suffered a lot while I was busy raising my two kids. I didn’t know I was over-occupied physically but there is a zero usage at my mental level. I was not free to my own self. I hardly had my personal breaks. If you are working or want to work, then you are right in engaging yourself mentally which is very important for your mental health. Money has nothing to do with it!

3. Socially Connect: The moment you step out of your house, you are much better connected to society. You make new friends, you discuss things which helps you to navigate new ventures in your life. Whether you are connected virtually or not, it doesn’t affect. The presence within the society is enough.

4.Financial Independence: Well, I want to mention here, you no need to earn 5 or 6 figure salary for the satisfaction you get. You can even feel the difference between few hundreds and thousands. The feeling that it’s your own hard-earned money and the moment you buy something from it for yourself or for your loved ones. This surely gives you a different peace!

 5.Creativity: I might sound different if I say, you kill your creativity when you are at home. This is not applicable to each. There are many women who are equally creative when they are managing all single-handedly. But in my case, my creativity was zeroed down or it got blocked in some way. When I choose a different way to unwind myself I realised there are so many things which I could do…. but never is late to learn and here I am today learning each day to write better and to learn every new thing!