In today's world, where just about everything is more convenient and accessible due to advances in technology across almost all sectors, it may seem as though it's a misnomer to even mention any disadvantages of technological advances. However, despite how far technology has taken humans and no matter how convenient it may make things, there are some disadvantages accompanying this level of access.



Just because you CAN do something doesn't mean you should. Recently I read an article about how wonderful it is that brides and grooms can crowdfund to pay for their weddings. Are you kidding me? That's the worst idea I've heard in a long time.

Crowdfunding is the practice of funding a project or venture by raising monetary contributions from a large number of people, today often performed via internet-mediated registries, but the concept can also be executed through mail-order subscriptions, benefit events, and other methods.

Crowdfunding sites were initially designed to let people donate to charitable causes, and invest in new business ventures. They were never intended to indulge brides for their Cinderella gown.

I've been familiar to online wedding invitations and online RSVPs. This is becoming more and more common. Couples have even started registering for "non-traditional" wedding gifts, such as honeymoon registries and in one case, in vitro fertilization. But still, these are all fine and acceptable. But I draw the line at crowdfunding to pay for your actual wedding.

I did some research and was shocked. There are entire websites dedicated solely to crowdfunding your wedding, like Crowded Wedding. This site allows you to privately target your friends and family specifically to ask them to pay for your wedding. I cannot decide if that's better or worse than putting it out in the public realm - it's almost like selling tickets. And if I'm a friend who couldn't afford to contribute, will I still be invited to the wedding? Does contributing to your wedding fund automatically guarantee me an invite? Probably not. But it should.







1. If you cannot afford to pay for your wedding, have a smaller wedding. Just the family and some close friends. If you still cannot afford to pay for a wedding, you should elope. For real. Or just keep a family dinner at your residence.

2. A wedding reception is a party given by you (or your parents) to celebrate the fact that you have exchanged your vows. I cannot think of anything ruder than asking your guests (or worse, random friends who aren't even going to be invited to your wedding) to help finance your big day. As far as violating etiquette goes, this is beyond the pale.

3. I recognize that most women (and some men) want to have a big, beautiful wedding to celebrate the big step they're taking in their lives. But most of the brides and grooms have absolutely no clue how much money the kind of wedding they want actually costs.

As I scrolled through the site, Move Your Mountain, and clicked on the tab for "Newlyweds," I became more horrified by what I found. Sure, there were some honeymoon registries (very popular now), but there were just as many people asking strangers to fund their actual weddings and pay for their families to fly to those weddings.



In a couple of cases, they were having destination weddings their parents couldn't afford to attend and they want somebody to pick up that tab for their parents.

Hold up, wait a minute! You're having a destination wedding, but your parents cannot afford to come? What were you thinking when you decided to have a destination wedding in the first place? You had to know your family would be budget challenged.

The amount of selfishness it requires to plan a wedding you know your immediate family won't be able to afford to attend and then put them in the position of being a charity case is truly astounding.


Sure, people are donating. What are you supposed to do if you get a crowdfunding email request from somebody you know who is pleading for your help to pay to fly her parents to her wedding or her father won't be there to walk her down the aisle? And what about the ones who are crowdfunding for their wedding gowns? Oh. My. God. You can get a beautiful wedding gown for a couple hundred dollars if you're creative and put in some effort. Asking your friends and family to donate literally thousands of dollars for the dress you're going to wear for one night is absolutely terrible.


A couple of years, doing a honeymoon registry online was still not that common, but it was becoming more acceptable. Let's face it - a honeymoon registry is basically an exercise in crowdfunding. But it's something your friends and family would enjoy contributing to as your wedding gift. And it's better than saying "give us cash for our honeymoon" when people ask where you have registered. There are articles all about the best ways to finance your wedding and to crowdfund your honeymoon, but its clear nobody thought anybody was going to start using crowdfunding as a regular wedding finance tool.




The funding requests you see for children with cancer and homeless veterans should give you an insight on how you're misusing and abusing the crowdfunding channel's true purpose. As much as I love weddings, nobody is ENTITLED to have a large wedding, or a designer wedding gown. If that's what you want, you have to pay for it. Crowdfunding your wedding exposes the bride and groom as exactly what they are - greedy and ill-mannered.

More couples are turning to crowdfunding sites like CrowdRise, GoFundMe and IndieGoGo to help pay for their weddings.



I read a post on Facebook where a couple who couldn’t afford to pay for a wedding had used bread and butter instead of the cake. It was so simple and there was no flaunting of money. Some people even get married at community mass weddings with many other couples when they know they can’t afford to spend a lot.


Having a small and simple ceremony is not a sin. Couples should be modest and not spend a lot to compete with other couples.