I'm attempting to clean my room of all the things that remind me of High School. I hated it a lot, it was a cesspool of insecurity and fear for me, and I'm glad to put it behind me. But cleaning is so hard for someone who is motivated so rarely. And I have an odd attachment to bad clothing.

Let me elaborate: in 8th grade, as per a normal 8th grader, I thought it was cool to have shirts that had stupid sayings on them (like, "I'm up and dressed, what more do you want?"). However, my parents hardly ever buy me new clothes. Mostly because I am completely incapable of being a girl and knowing how to properly dress myself, and partly because I just don't care enough to bother them about it. Unfortunately, this meant that as I grew up through high school my wardrobe did not follow. Around Junior year I really started to loath all those stupid t-shirts, and longed to be rid of them. The only problem was I lacked any clothes besides those t-shirts. I had to keep them.

Thankfully my much more fashionable sister came to my rescue and gave me a 100 dollar gift card to Old Navy for graduation, with the promise that she would take me and help me be more fashion-conscious (i.e. pick clothes out for me and show me how to wear them.) I just recently went with her this weekend and basically obtained a whole new wardrobe lacking those t-shirts (which she banned me from wearing ever again.) This means it is time to donate the ones that don't have holes in them, and it is surprisingly sad.

Maybe it's because they've been the only thing I wore since 8th grade, maybe it's because I'm a pack rat and like to keep everything I own regardless if I actually need/want them or not. I've been folding t-shirts sadly all day (and secretly keeping a few of my old anime ones that I will probably never wear again, but deep in my soul I still kind-of like anime and I don't want to totally let go of it.)

I know as soon as the process of getting rid of all my old high school stuff is done I will feel loads better, but right now it's just kind of like I'm ripping a piece of my self out and putting it away. Which I need to do so I can transition into college and make new friends and have new and awesome experiences. By the way, I'm totally expecting college to be mind-blowingly awesome. I've probably set my expectations too high but I don't care. The media has promised me awesome college experiences, and I want them damnit!

It's really amazing how many memories a person can accumulate over the course of six years (I'm counting middle school).

(You don't have to read this next part if your name isn't Chloe, but you can if you want.)

Dear Chloe,

I found all that old TTA stuff and feel a strike of nostalgia and want to go back and find all of it again, but I'm afraid it wont be as awesome as I remember.

The end.

Kate.

(The rest of you can start reading again.)

Anyway, I just feel kind-of sad and nostalgic. Like the fact that I'm moving on just now hit me. I'm never going back to High School. Ever.

I don't have to see anyone from there ever again if I don't want to.

I can totally start over new.

I am excited and scared.