Having survived the challenges of covid and the isolation that came with the worldwide lockdown, I am acutely aware of the damage to one’s psyche that can come with isolation and loneliness.  It’s funny, as a writer I also know there is a vast difference between being alone and loneliness. I have long accepted, I enjoy being alone. I am comfortable with silence and I enjoy living by myself. These are all personal choices. Some others may have trouble being alone. I do not.

I think the difference comes down to a choice. During the lockdown, not having a choice made being alone in my apartment feel unbearable at times. I would go to the supermarket all masked up but comforted for the brief exposure to other human beings. I am still to this day trying to break the habit of going to the supermarket so frequently as if it has become a mechanism of self-comfort.

I am writing all this because for two reasons. One, now that I am working from home, I am trying to be conscious of the need to interact with others on a regular basis. I don’t want to fall into habits that lead to isolation on my part.

The other reason is I am hearing so much talk at the Buddhist center and on the news about the epidemic of loneliness impacting our country. It is not just affecting people over the age of 50. The youth of America are also suffering. This suffering is playing out in all sorts of ways negatively impacting all of our lives in one way or the other.

As it is the mission of this blog and my own personal mission to encourage  myself and others to live our best lives, I feel it is important to raise awareness with everyone. It is vital we all keep an eye out to recognize if you are suffering from loneliness or some you care about is and do something to change things before it is too late.

The Surgeon General in his own words

I found this letter from the Surgeon General Vivek H. Murthy, M.D., M.B.A. contained in an article on the hhs.gov website in the PDF Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community written in 2023.

The letter clearly addressed the issue of loneliness affecting our society and suggestions on how to address it. I am including it here because I think it is something everyone should read to help themselves or any friend or family member they think may be suffering.

“Letter from the Surgeon General

When I first took office as Surgeon General in 2014, I didn’t view loneliness as a public health concern. But that was before I embarked on a cross-country listening tour, where I heard stories from my fellow Americans that surprised me.

People began to tell me they felt isolated, invisible, and insignificant. Even when they couldn’t put their finger on the word “lonely,” time and time again, people of all ages and socioeconomic backgrounds, from every corner of the country, would tell me, “I have to shoulder all of life’s burdens by myself,” or “if I disappear tomorrow, no one will even notice.”

It was a lightbulb moment for me: social disconnection was far more common than I had realized.

In the scientific literature, I found confirmation of what I was hearing. In recent years, about one-in-two adults in America reported experiencing loneliness.1-3 And that was before the COVID-19 pandemic cut off so many of us from friends, loved ones, and support systems, exacerbating loneliness and isolation.

Loneliness is far more than just a bad feeling—it harms both individual and societal health. It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety, and premature death. The mortality impact of being socially disconnected is similar to that caused by smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day, 4 and even greater than that associated with obesity and physical inactivity. And the harmful consequences of a society that lacks social connection can be felt in our schools, workplaces, and civic organizations, where performance, productivity, and engagement are diminished.

Given the profound consequences of loneliness and isolation, we have an opportunity, and an obligation, to make the same investments in addressing social connection that we have made in addressing tobacco use, obesity, and the addiction crisis. This Surgeon General’s Advisory shows us how to build more connected lives and a more connected society.

If we fail to do so, we will pay an ever-increasing price in the form of our individual and collective health and well-being. And we will continue to splinter and divide until we can no longer stand as a community or a country. Instead of coming together to take on the great challenges before us, we will further retreat to our corners—angry, sick, and alone.

We are called to build a movement to mend the social fabric of our nation. It will take all of us—individuals and families, schools and workplaces, health care and public health systems, technology companies, governments, faith organizations, and communities—working together to destigmatize loneliness and change our cultural and policy response to it. It will require reimagining the structures, policies, and programs that shape a community to best support the development of healthy relationships.

Each of us can start now, in our own lives, by strengthening our connections and relationships. Our individual relationships are an untapped resource—a source of healing hiding in plain sight. They can help us live healthier, more productive, and more fulfilled lives. Answer that phone call from a friend. Make time to share a meal. Listen without the distraction of your phone. Perform an act of service. Express yourself authentically. The keys to human connection are simple, but extraordinarily powerful.

Each of us can start now, in our own lives, by strengthening our connections and relationships. Loneliness and isolation represent profound threats to our health and well-being. But we have the power to respond. By taking small steps every day to strengthen our relationships, and by supporting community efforts to rebuild social connection, we can rise to meet this moment together. We can build lives and communities that are healthier and happier. And we can ensure our country and the world are better poised than ever to take on the challenges that lay ahead. Our future depends on what we do today.                

Vivek H. Murthy, M.D., M.B.A. 

19th and 21st Surgeon General of the United States 

 Vice Admiral, United States Public Health Service”

Consider this article my waving the red flag of awareness. It does not take a lot to spend time reaching out and talking to a friend or family member you think may be isolating themselves. Also, if you are feeling the effects of loneliness, now if the opportunity to step out f your comfort zone and find an activity you love and join a group to get yourself out and among the living.

I have to say I am very grateful that I became a Buddhist and a member of the SGI-USA before the pandemic hit. Despite the lockdown, I had access via zoom to members of my SGI local district with whom I could share my thoughts and feelings. Now that we are back to our new normal, I continue to be grateful for the organization. It has provided me a support system of fellow members to hang with when I feel lost or lonely and best of all, these are people committed to living their lives focused on creating happiness for themselves and others. I am also grateful that through the inspirational books of President Daisaku Ikeda, such as The Wisdom for Creating Happiness and Peace, and many others, I have found the tools that have helped me transform my thinking for the better. They have helped me to address through hard work and chanting, issues that have plagued me my entire life. I wouldn’t say my life is perfect, but I feel equipped with tools to help me do the hard work of healing my inner demons and making choices that provide me with a sense of joy. I could not ask for a better resource in the fight against loneliness.

My Buddhist practice is to me like a genuine yoga practice. Both take work and you get from it what you put into it with regard to the positive impact it can have on your spiritual, mental, and physical health.

If you ever find yourself interested in learning more about Nichiren Buddhism, check out www.sgi-usa.org or take a look at the articles and podcasts available at the website https://buddhability.org

You will never find a nicer bunch of people.

Please note that this article does have links to websites where I got my information used herein. I also am a proud member of the Amazon Associates Program. I have Amazon Affiliate links in this article as well. If you choose to click on any of the Amazon Affiliate links and make a purchase, I will receive a commission at no additional cost to you.