“How to be successful?” All of us have asked that question to ourselves. There is not a single way to being Successful, but you can learn from other successful people!

Many people want to know how to be successful. You are one of them, for sure, that is why you are here! But what is success to you?

The definition of success varies from person to person. But all of us will feel successful once we are content with life or better than others.

Our ego is at play most of the time, especially if it is huge!

I am not successful, so I will focus on the lessons I learned from my Successful Mom. Here is how to be successful based on her success:

1. Choose a field and stick with it.
2. You can start chasing your goals even from rock bottom.
3. Cut off the people holding you back.
4. Ignore the negative people you can’t cut off.
5. Be generous to the less fortunate.

Let’s begin.

How to Be Successful: 5 Lessons From My Successful Mom

Why talk about how to be successful? Simple answer: all people want that.

I want to be successful, too. But believe it or not, my definition of success is not correlated with how much money I have. It is more about impact.

I have projects. While it is good if I earn money from them, I would know I became successful once my name is everywhere — even with $0 in my bank account.

People want to be important, or at least recognized for something. That is mostly what motivates them to set goals and achieve them.

Want to get rich? You may think it is only because you want to buy whatever you want, but there is an underlying desire to be a VIP: a very important person.

Want to be a lawyer? Society looks up to lawyers, as well as doctors and engineers. There is an underlying desire to be looked up to.

Want to look like a goddess? Those who undergo plastic surgeries may say that they do it for themselves. But in reality, their natural facial features make them feel unimportant in society.

We want to matter. We want attention.

According to Tony Robbins, the basic human needs are certainty, variety, connection, growth, contribution, and significance.

My mom gets a lot of attention, so she feels that she matters.

She is good-looking for her age, a high-achieving administrator at an educational institution, has a Ph.D. from one of the top universities in the Philippines, is from a renowned political family, and has beautiful and good children. *ehem*

I might sound exaggerating, but she has a good life despite her failed marriage. Actually, her failed marriage doesn’t matter because it is just one area in her life.

That was traumatic. Imagine how painful it would feel if you discovered that your partner had been cheating on you after two decades of believing they were faithful.

So because my mother is successful in many ways, I behave. My family background, in general, affects my decisions. I don’t want to ruin their reputation!

Okay, how to be successful? Here are the lessons on success I learned from my successful mom, which can help you if you want to be successful!

1. Choose a field and stick with it.

How to be successful? Choose a field and stick with it!

My mom started as a teacher in 1998 at the school where I and my adult brothers studied. If you know where I studied from pre-school through high school, that was where she first taught. It is a private school in my hometown.

Around 10 years later, she started teaching at colleges and universities.

If I remember correctly, her first university job was at a government-run university that is known for its quality education.

Anyone who passed the entrance exam and studied there is perceived as smarter than the majority. It is a top-performing school!

A few years later, she became a professor at the school where I finished my bachelor’s degree but I came a few years later than her. She became the chairman of the languages area eventually.

When I graduated in 2017, she resigned. It was a coincidence!

Currently, she is the school principal at a university where I had my first job as an administrative assistant. I left in 2018.

You see, I grew up close to her. This is why the majority of those who know her, know me more than my siblings. But that is not the point.

My mom is what Verywell Family calls a helicopter parent, but unintentionally. She worked as an educator at the schools I attended from pre-school through college, and then my first job was at her workplace.

She entered the education field in 1998, and she is still there. That is how she was able to go upward: what people call climbing the corporate ladder.

If you want to climb the corporate ladder, change companies but not industries. You will start from scratch if you enter a new industry.

I changed fields twice.

I majored in civil engineering → before I majored in political science → but I work in the SEO industry. I have been in the SEO industry since 2019.

2. You can start chasing your goals even from rock bottom.

My mom got married and bore children young. My older brother was born in 1994, I in 1996, and my younger brother in 1998. She was 18, 20, and 22, respectively!

In society, at least where I am, premarital sex is bad. And if you got pregnant before you even finished college, people would think you couldn’t be successful.

My mom got pregnant before marriage. She also mentioned that she was attending college classes while pregnant, but I don’t know who among us was inside her.

Our family was financially struggling in the early days. My mom was a teacher at a local private school, and my father was a bank employee.

We lived in a compound with my father-side relatives. I had no problem with it. I was close with my cousins and neighbors, so I had a great childhood.

The internet in the 2000s was less interesting than playing with other children in the streets. Pew Research Center has a timeline of the internet.

My mom’s family was already considerably wealthy, but that wealth couldn’t be brought into the children’s families. She needed to work to make things work.

My parents had credit card debt, and debt to relatives. I mentioned that when I talked about how to be financially comfortable.

Their financial struggles ended only when I and my brothers graduated from college. My parents paid for our bachelor’s degrees. That is the norm here.

I have a little brother, but he was born in 2011. His older siblings work and have money, so he is quite spoiled. But we expect him to do household chores!

3. Cut off the people holding you back.

How to be successful? Cut off the people holding you back!

We were financially struggling, but my mom was emotionally and mentally struggling on top of that. Looking back, my father was abusive.

I remember he was always lying on the couch, holding his phone. We thought he was playing games, but he was talking to his mistress in landscape mode.

Every time he got home, my mom would serve him food on the table. He also wanted his clothes to smell good.

We were not expected to do the laundry, but when I tried it out, the clothes smelled bad. He got mad at me, and that demotivated and hurt me.

Psychology Today explains that children who often receive criticism and disapproval may rebel.

I was in college when the marital issues came about. My mom was working at my school, so I saw how she was outside the home during those times.

She was not crying in public, but she was ashamed of it. I was also ashamed of it. I couldn’t tell my friends my father was cheating.

I didn’t notice she lost weight, but she did. She showed me her pictures from that time, and I saw her bone structure. She is healthier now, and successful.

When we left my father, my older brother and I received our bachelor’s degrees. It was an emotional and financial relief to her. *sigh*

4. Ignore the negative people you can’t cut off.

When you are successful, many people will be envious. They will want to bring you down, take your position, or surpass you.

That is normal not just in the workplace, but in any situation.

If your neighbor is an engineer with a Lamborghini, you could spread rumors to ruin his reputation and steal his car if you have lost your mind.

If stealing is your habit, you may be a kleptomaniac. Mayo Clinic says that kleptomania is a mental disorder that involves stealing items you don’t need. You just want to satisfy the urge to steal.

If your best friend has a goddess-like girlfriend, you might ditch your current girlfriend and date someone who looks like Kendall Jenner.

Negative people are everywhere, and you can’t always cut them off. Sometimes, you need to deal with them on a regular basis.

I don’t want to create issues, but I know my mom has dealt with negative people throughout her career. She doesn’t nag, but she rants!

5. Be generous to the less fortunate.

My mom often pays more than the actual price. In the Philippines, there are lots of people considered poor. You will see them everywhere.

Our family is generally considered upper class. I am with my mom, so when I say “family,” I am talking about the mother-side family.

The mother-side family is a political family. Political family members feel obligated to give to the less fortunate.

For instance, during any public holidays where giving is the main activity, many strangers go to my grandmother’s house and ask for money. And we give.

But my mom, because she has more financial resources than needed, also wants to be generous to those working unstable or low-paying jobs.

We had a flat tire, so we took the car to a family-owned vulcanizing shop along the road. They fixed nothing, but my mom paid them the price of four McDonald’s burgers for their opinion. Yes — OPINION!

If you want to know what to when when you get a flat tire in the middle of the road, wikiHow has a guide on how to handle a flat tire.

When we had the car washed, my mom had them keep the change. She also always leaves a tip at restaurants that don’t charge for service.

When you have money, money is not an issue. No financial problems, so more time to be in touch with your heart and feel for the less fortunate.

If someone is greedy and thinks that everyone is out to take money from them, they have just enough. You will know the rich and the poor by observing that.

Last Words

People have different requirements for success. If you wonder how to be successful, you will find the answer if you look at your innermost desires.

For example, I am passionate about writing, so being successful for me is being seen as a good writer in the subjects I am interested in.

The same goes for contentment. Being content doesn’t always mean being satisfied with “enough.” You may want a huge house and three cars to be content.

What will you do after knowing how to be successful?

If you enjoyed reading how to be successful, here is a video of me talking about my failures because I am not successful: