So, I sat down and not only did a reading for myself, but I did it knowing I was going to share it with you. Here’s the basic process I follow when doing a reading…

Step One: Choose a question & a spread.

Since I knew I would be sharing this reading with you guys, I choose one I created a PDF file for, the Grand Cross Spread. Which is also named the Celtic Cross Spread. These ten cards help to cover the general components within a person’s life.

As for my question, I wanted to choose something that reflected what you can do with tarot.

I have been feeling really terrible these last few weeks, as I have been journeying through something known as the Dark Night of the Soul. Basically, it is, “a period of spiritual desolation suffered by a mystic in which all sense of consolation is removed.”

*Check out this post on the Dark Night of the Soul from Luna & Sol: 7 Omens That Herald the Dark Night of the Soul.

In simple terms, it is a moment in a person’s life where they are not only experiencing a form of depression but their spiritual beliefs aren’t enough to comfort them.

Due to some things that have been happening in my life, I have been struggling and not enjoying the current place I was in my healing journey. But this last week-ish I have been slowly improving and so I wanted to see where I was on my journey.

My question: “Where am I, in my current journey, through the Dark Night of my Soul?”

Step Two: A Deck.

While I use the Rider-Waite-Smith deck for others and to increase my knowledge about the tarot, I rarely use this deck. Even though this deck is wonderful for beginners and the images are deep and insightful, the style and color scheme aren’t really my style.

For that reason, I have purchased various decks over the years. Sometimes the artwork has been what has drawn me to a particular deck and other times it has been an intuitive pull or tug. In having talked with other tarot readers, I have found that we each have a deck or two that is our favorite.

Then the other decks we have, can either be ones that were best suited for us doing a particular path of our life’s journey. Or sometimes we will feel the pull of a deck because it will expand our knowledge. Maybe their definition of a card will open our mind, or the image itself might trigger something deep within.

Whatever the reason, you might find yourself trying out various decks to find the one that resonates with you. (My tarot teacher had over 400 decks last time she counted. To say she’s a fan of the artwork would be an understatement.)

In this case I stuck with the Rider-Waite-Smith, so that my reading made sense to you guys.

Step Three: Gather your tools.

Once I knew what question, spread, and deck I was going to use, I pulled out my deck, my notebook, and my notes. While I know the meanings of each card, I sometimes will read through my notes about a specific card, in order to trigger my intuition.

I keep my notes in Eden Gray’s A Complete Guide to the Tarot. As you can see, my copy has become rather beat up. Between its travels to my tarot class in my purse, a spilled water bottle, and just time my book needed some TLC and duck-tape.

What I love about this book is that it not only includes the basics for a beginner (including the tools found within tarot, symbolism, and meanings) but there’s also space to write your own notes. Over time I have added meanings, observations, and notes from my class. As you can see, I have to write small to include all that is found within one card.

Step Four: Shuffle in your question & Cut the deck. Then deal.

After I have my materials, I prepare myself to do a tarot reading. For me, this means that I re-ground, shield, cut my cords, check my chakras, and call on my spirit guides to come assist me.

I sometimes also take the time to let my spirit guides in on what I was thinking. While my question directs them, in sharing a bit about what my thought process was or what I hope to gain from this reading, I am developing and maintaining a healthy relationship with my spirit guides.

In this particular reading, I shuffled in my question and while I shuffled, I spent my time, speaking with my spirit guides. After I felt the deck was ready, I cut the cards towards myself (indicating that the reading is for me and from my point of view). I then laid out the cards based on the Grand Cross spread.

Step Five: Shadow Card & What Pops.

After I laid out my spread, I take a look at my shadow card. This card will let me know a little bit about the general environment surrounding my question. In this instance, the Six of Swords is my shadow card.

Given the context of the reading my intuition guides me to the meaning of “god has a plan,” as my tarot teacher puts it. What she meant by this, is that in some instances the Six of Swords can represent the divine or even soul contract aspect of our lives.

This lets me know that my dark night of the soul, was not some accidental instance, but was in Spirit’s plan for me. As a result, I know that what I am going through has a purpose and end result meant to benefit me and my life.

The second step I take in a reading is to see what catches my eye. This like the shadow card, offers insight into the general mood and energy of the reading.

In this reading, these things popped:

• The color gray- which represents wisdom.
• Many Major Arcana cards- which let me know that the topic in question has to do with the big lessons and events in life. Rather than the day-to-day moments which are represented with the Minor Arcana.
• Wands & Pentacles- The wands represent fire energy and the pentacles are earth.
• An absence of Swords- While swords are not always the painful cards of the deck, they oftentimes do bring with them hardship. To not see them, lets me know that while I have been through some pain, that pain is not present anymore in my life.
• An absence of the 5 of Pentacles- While I do have pentacles, the 5 of Pentacles represents the dark night of the soul. In previous readings I have done, this card was present, today it isn’t. This lets me know that I am journeying away from this darkness rather that into it.

Step Six: Start my reading.

After I have gotten a broad sense of what tone the reading has, I like to start with position 7. While not the order of the Grand Cross it helps me further my understand the setting. Position seven is the Seeker. Or the person who is “seeking” answers. They are also known as the Querant.

In this instance, the Seeker is me.

With that in mind, I look at position seven and see the 5 of Wands. This card is meant to shed light on my current state. Keeping that in mind, I took a moment to gaze at the card.

In the beginning I would need to grab my book and look up the card. I then would see what made the most sense based on the question and the position of the card. Now the process that our mind goes through, in recalling the meaning of the card and which one fits with the reading, happens within my subconscious.

While I still follow these steps, I am not consciously aware of it anymore. Instead I look at the 5 of Wands and know that in this instance the card symbolizes my mental state. Wands are thoughts and ideas.

Considering how I spent my day and the thoughts that have been swirling within my mind, the 5 of Wands is an apropos representation of where my head is. It’s been spinning with new ideas and all I could be doing. While also having some internal conflict trying to decide how to spend my time.

Position One: The General Environment

After I understanding the Seeker, it is time to move on to the next position in the spread. Position one represents the general environment concerning the spread. In this reading, that card is the Moon.

This Major Arcana card represents a journey that must be traveled via intuition. Since only a small bit of light shines on my path, the Moon lets me know that the bigger picture of my journey is yet to be revealed.

When you pair this meaning with my question about where I am on my journey, then you learn that as things currently stand I need to follow my intuition. That the answers and bigger picture are not present at this time. My eyes won’t be what get me through, but rather what my heart has to tell me.

Position Two: What’s Coming in or Blocking

After I understand the general environment, I move on to position two- What is coming in or blocks. This card lays on-top of position one and is always read right-side-up. For myself, this is not important since I don’t do spreads with reversals as a general rule.

Reversals:

When I first started reading tarot I had a hard enough time learning the meanings for 78 cards without doubling that to include the reversals. Then through the course of my lessons I asked my teacher if I needed to utilize reversals.

She informed me that the tarot has cards that represent meanings found within the reversals. You don’t need to use reversals to get a strong reading. That said, I have sometimes shuffled my cards and somehow a card comes up reversed. Other times, a card may be out of place (all the cards surrounding it are positive while this ones negative) and it can mean needing to read the card reversed.

That being said, I achieve the guidance I seek without needed to throw in reversals. It is up to each tarot reader to choose how they wish to utilize or not utilize reversals.

Now getting back to my spread, I find the card, Knight of Wands, in position two. In this position the card has the potential to represent what is acting as our roadblock on our journey. Or this position can represent what is coming to our environment.

In this instance my card is positive and also represents new endeavors. Due to this, I know this card is representing what is coming to my life. The Knight of Wands is fire energy and can represent a change in career. Due to some plans I have, I know that this card symbolizes new ventures on a business level that are manifesting and coming into my life.

Since this card has showed up in a spread about my mental and emotional state, I learn that through my work I can find solace and maybe even aid. While career is a different area of my life, it will offer me a distraction and separation from my internal self.

Position Three: The Catalyst

Once I understand what’s going on in my life and what’s headed my way, I look to position three to see what the catalyst was. In this instance, the King of Wands represents what brought about my journey into my current Dark Night of the Soul.

This card sheds light onto my past and how I came to be in this current situation. In gazing at the King of Wands I see once again that fire energy.

The King of Wands as a court card can symbolize people or situations. In this instance, one of the personalities associated with the King of Wands is the young “man” or in this instance woman who is inexperienced. Sometimes known as the “Baby King,” the King of Wands tells me that it was through my own ignorance that I triggered this journey.

Going Deeper:

In looking at each card we can gain insight and find answers to our question. But as we grow as tarot readers we can start to look at the connection or relationship the cards have with one another. In this instances we will be looking at the relationship between the Seeker and the Catalyst.

The 5 of Wands and the King of Wands are both fire energy. They are the first suit within the Minor Arcana, and represent the beginning journeys we take.

Despite the connection found with these two cards, in looking at the people in the images, we can see that they are not interacting with each other belong their energies. The King sits with his back to the 5 of Wands, which show people lost within their own battle.

Position Four: What’s Passing

As we move past position three, we move on to what’s just passing from my life. The card for this reading, the Devil.

This Major Arcana card symbolizes the old thought patterns and fears in my life. It also means being trapped within oneself, lost within fears and pain.

Considering my past, this card is an accurate reading of what I have been feeling. The positive, is that this card is in the What’s Passing position of the spread. While I have been tackling my fears, this portion of my journey is completed and I have moved past this trapped state.

Position Five: What’s Manifesting

Moving past the Devil, I see the 6 of Pentacles. In this position, the 6 of Pentacles is meant to communicate with me what is starting to be created and will grow in the coming days. However, there are times for various reasons when a tarot reader just can’t quiet figure out what the meaning is meant to be.

In those instances, you pull clarifying cards, to do exactly that…clarify.

For myself, this was the card that gave me the most trouble. So I added six more cards to get a broader sense of what energy/topic was being manifested.

While I had the various meanings of the 6 of Pentacles swirling within my mind, my intuition wasn’t able to pick out a meaning to assign this card, for this reading.

In pulling six more: The King of Cups (emotional roller-coaster), 7 of Wands (well-supported), Empress (mother & tenderness), 6 of Cups (reflection & painful memories fading) Emperor (well supported & strong home), and 6 of Wands (victory & celebration) I was able to understand what was being said with the 6 of Pentacles.

In this reading, this card let me know that as time passed I was manifesting a wonderful new state. Where I will be able to give (wealthy man) rather than feel desolate (beggars).

Upon reflection this card was difficult to read, because while I am improving, my first thought wasn’t celebration. Yet at the same time, my intuition let me know that the desolation found in resonating with the beggars wasn’t accurate either.

In pulling six more cards I was able to clarify the happy, healing, and supportive energy that is coming my way.

Position 6: What May Follow

Once I had a grasp on what the 6 of Pentacles was telling me, I moved onto position six. Where I encountered the 9 of Pentacles. This card was simple for me to read, because through time I have come to build a repore and understanding.

For myself, this card symbolizes the woman who is enjoying the good things in life. Her solitary existence has turned more thoughtful and she spends her day comfortable and happy.

Through time and doing many readings, there are some cards that will continually present themselves to you. In the process, you can utilize not only the book’s meanings but your own experience with the cards. From your personal experience, the tarot cards will begin to connect with you on a personal level.

The meanings might shift from popular definition, but a greater level of ease and understanding will be attained. Which is how you get such unique tarot readers. What they see will differ from others, when both people are looking at the same spread.

Position 8: Outside Influences

Once I got to see that my journey through the darkness is slowly climbing back into the light and into a world of happiness, I was able to achieve a deeper understanding about where I am. This knowledge not only helps me keep my eye out for things yet to come, but also gives me hope and strength as I journey towards the good things in life.

With this happy message delivered, I turned my attention to position eight. While positions five and six are about what is coming, position eight returns to the present and what is happening presently. In this case, how the external world is influencing me right now.

The Hierophant has many meanings like all the other cards, but sometimes you might find that there are a couple meanings that work within your spread. In these instances, you can gain insight on multiple levels in different areas of your life.

In this reading given the position, the Hierophant symbolizes the social expectations that are being placed upon me by certain people in my life. While I have been dealing with my pain and bringing myself back into a harmonious place, I have encountered a few rude and even mean comments because I have not been acting the way some people want me to.

On the other hand, this card is also representative of sages who provide guidance. While there have been those who haven’t honored where I am, I also have wonderful family who have been supportive. I even reached out to my healer, who was able to provide me some guidance so I can focus on re-balancing Spirit, my body and my soul. (Also represented by the Hierophant).

Going Deeper:

While the the Grand Cross spread has only 10 cards, these cards offer great insight. In any reading I like to sit with things and look. I also like to look from different angles and positions. In this way I achieve a deeper and greater understand.

For example, in referencing all the meanings of the Hierophant, I was able to uncover multiple meanings that fit with my reading, providing me another layer of understanding. Another way we can reach deeper is to look at the relationship of the cards.

In looking at the cards horizontally we can see how they interact. The woman in the 9 of Pentacles has her head tilted, and when you follow her gaze you find the Hierophant.

In considering this, you can see I will achieve the contented state found in the image of the 9 of Pentacles, by calling on those who love me to continue their aid.

Then if you gaze at the Knight of Wands, you can see him charging away from the 9 of Pentacles and Hierophant. Since these cards are not interacting, it lets me know that this new content state of being with the aid of family is a different aspect of my life from my career.

Lastly in looking at the Moon and Devil so close together, I can see darker energies present next to my three positive cards. This lets me know that while it’s leaving, the darkness isn’t gone from my life yet. But I am working my way towards the good things in life.

Position 9: Hopes &/or Fears

While you could spend another ten minutes sitting with the horizontal relationships of these cards, I am moving on-wards towards position nine. Here my hopes are represented by Death.

While a card can sometimes have both positive and negative attributes that share both the Seekers hopes and fears, in this instance Death only brings me joy.

This card symbolizes the transformations that we go through in life. These are the healing journeys that we willing take in life (as opposed to Tower moments).

In this reading, my hope is that as I travel through my Dark Night of the Soul,and that some good will come of it. That I will travel to a better place/state. Knowing that while painful, this is a stage in my healing journey.

Going Deeper:

With a smile, I take a moment to look at the relationship between Death and position five- What’s manifesting. In looking at the 6 of Pentacles I can see what type of transformation will come with Death.

Since these cards support one another, my hopes are being reaffirmed rather than contradicted. While the wealthy man and the skeleton knight don’t face one another, they are still compatible in nature.

An added level to this transformation comes from the 6 of Pentacles. This card is the Karmic Debt card of the deck. Which lets me know that just as the 6 of Swords stated, this healing journey of transformation is all part of the plan.

Position 10: The Outcome

The final card of the spread is the Page of Cups. In this position, the Page talks about where this journey will lead. While there can be outcomes to a situation, my life will continue.

In this reading, the Page of Cups has many meanings that are relevant to my question. The first is “someday.” Known as the “someday,” card it lets me know that the journey I am on is improving but not yet completed. It will be… someday.

The second meaning that I can pull from this card in reference to my question, is that I need to have child-esc trust. When we are on the path of the Moon, we can’t see the big picture. The answers elude us, and we need to carry a child-esc trust as we journey forward.

As I travel, the Page of Cups lets me know that I need to have faith, the trust a child has in those he/she loves.

The final message of the Page of Cups references meditation and the awakening of emotions. Like the childhood trust, these meanings let me know that as I travel on my journey meditation and working with my heart chakra will go a long way to help me reach the end of my journey someday.

Going Deeper:

Once I know where my journey is leading, I take a moment to look at the Page of Cups from a new angle. By reading the cards vertically, I am able to approach the reading from a new perspective or angle.

By reading a spread in the order it was created, you attain the wisdom meant to be shared. Then when you have studied each card, in working through the spread backwards, sideways, horizontally, vertically, and even diagonally you can gain an added layer of insight.

In this instance, by looking at the cards vertically I learn a little bit more about where I am in life. Within this reading, I can see the color gray springing to mind again, meaning wisdom. When I take a moment to sit with things, I can see that wisdom not only is present in my life now (Hierophant) but that will come with me and become a part of my life moving forward (Death).

Final Thoughts:

The last step I take in any reading is to gaze over my spread one last time. Is there any cards I wish to clarify? What catches my eye now? Based on what I now know, are any of the cards meanings changed?

Having written down my spread and thoughts, I gather my cards together and shuffle my deck clear of the readings energy. Then my deck is ready to be used again, and my answer was found.

So that’s how I do a reading. From beginning to end, I open myself up to the wisdom and guidance of the Universe so that I may unveil the truth and find what I need to live a better life.

With my spread laid out and having walked you through it, what do you think? Was there any observations you made I didn’t mention? What did you discover from my tarot reading?

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