The Woman who featured in a four-some sex video that went viral on Tuesday has been kicked out of home by the husband, the woman took to her instagram account by handle Kenyassenga and announced their separation pending divorce proceedings.

There are various reactions to the latest development but this one by Aoko Otieno stood out:

No matter how liberated, emancipated or educated a woman is, she cannot urinate through the window.

It is a man’s world. Don’t give me that look, I am only being pragmatic. Res ipsa loquitur (facts speak for themselves). Just because you have a degree, can balance on heels, holds a corporate job, and has watched Tyler Perry is not enough reason to bank on the utopia of equality. Men and Women are not equal. Will never be. Were not meant to be. The confab should be about equity. Maybe I’ll find time to elucidate the difference.

Being a Ssenga is admirable. In Uganda, the tradition has transcended time and all conundrums that came with modernity. I advocate for it because it teaches women to enjoy sex. Gertrude Mungai has been an intimacy tutor for eons now. Even had a program on K24 on the same. She has thrived in her sexuality and sensuality business, is happily married with kids because her works have a modicum of sense and is subtle in her demonstrations. She does not engage in live orgies with a bunch of inexperienced oiks and apes in the name of Ssenga.

No level headed man will be comfortable with his wife, the mother of his kids, fucking another man. In fact, what you do not know, is that in one of her recent Insta stories, your liberated married woman intimated that she is getting divorced! That there shows you her husband supported her business as sex tutor, not her maniac coitus pluralism with oafs. Get the damn difference!

There is this rush of testosterone in modern women- they call it liberation. Typically hinged on ‘if a man can do it, a woman should to.’ Lol, here is why the playground is not leveled ladies.

Our biggest asset which also becomes our anathema, is our age. That explains why we lie about our age. Very few women are okay and comfortable with looking and being old. It is all hinged on the notion or reality, depending on how you see it, that our value diminishes with age.

If today, a 40-year-old man catches his 36-year-old wife cheating and he walks out; it is a cinch, by next week, he will be sitting across a hot 26-year-old damsel, ready to wife her.

His 36-year-old (ex) wife’s options on the other hand, are miserly. The reservoir of men available for her is constricted. No man will be quick to jump in with a spent cartridge, unless she is rich and or famous. Feel free to dismiss this as patriarchal balderdash, but it is what it is. Look at the caliber of men the Ssenga was fucking. A bunch of low lives nowhere near her polished doktari of a husband – and that is why they morphed into extortionists.

It would be foolish of me to underrate the pain of a cheating spouse for both genders. But women deal with cheating better than men. A woman will smell another woman’s cheap perfume all over your dick, cry and get over it. Men are sentimental and fickle. His wife cheating is the biggest cudgel on his manhood and ego. Take 10 women who were cheated on. Count how many forgave- including Hillary Clinton and Beyoncé. Take 10 men, how many forgave? Good. Therein lies your answer.

Does it mean men should cheat and women forgive? That is not up to me. I am only stating things as they are. The rest are individual decisions. Besides, women are not innocent in the cheating game either. How many men are raising kids that are sired by other men in the period of their marriage?

The crux of this piece is, all ye mamas admiring your dread-locked Ssenga and her liberation, it is ill advised. All ye women screaming, ‘but men cheat, why shouldn’t women cheat too?’ Newsflash darling, the consequences for a woman who cheats are weightier. Scream, screech all you want, it will not change the status quo.

Society will side with the man, including your female friends and relatives who will be very willing to take your place once you are out. If a man cheats, your pastor, mother, chamaa mates and many others will ask you to stay for the sake of children…and Family.
Aoko did not create the society or make the rules. Punch the keyboard with a feminism laden reply to my piece, I don’t mind. But after you are done, and you are a married woman, go out there and cheat and let us see how it will end for you. If you are a single woman, you can be excused.

There’s no liberation in being a 40 year old mother of three who gets passed around by random dickheads like a piece of weed. That is neither what Ssenga or liberation is about. That is just being a morally depraved, shameless, ‘harloting’ cougar.

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