Disclaimer – This article does not intend to offer treatment nor intended to be taken seriously. THIS IS A JOKE.

Monday phobia
Fear of Monday is a phobia that affects over 250,000 people in America alone. It is defined as a fear of Monday of any form or kind. People suffering from the fear of Monday or Monday phobia will do anything and everything to avoid Monday of any form or kind. Any event, person or situation that resembles, relates to or symbolizes “Monday” can trigger this fear.

This Monday phobia is generally caused by some influence of “Monday” in the person’s life through the media, cinema, childhood experiences, family experiences, dreams, books, news events, etc.

Physical Symptoms of Fear of Monday or Monday Fears
shaking/trembling,
sweating excessively,
nausea,
dizziness,
hyperventilation,
chest pain,
dry mouth,
freezing,
losing control over emotions,
hyperactive bowels,
refusal or inability to sleep,
change in sleeping patterns,
stomach pains,
possible psychosomatic responses,
fear of dying,
intense anxiety attack,
incoherency in speaking,
incoherency in thinking,
refusal to go anywhere considered as unsafe,
palpitations.

Some of the common mental processes associated with Monday phobia include:
ignoring the positive
exaggerating
over generalizing
looking for disaster
thinking in all or nothing terms.

Terror: A persistent and overwhelming fear of Monday.

Obsessive Thoughts: Difficulty thinking about anything other than the fear of Monday.

Desire to Flee: An intense instinct to leave the situation that involves the fear of Monday.

Anticipatory Anxiety: Persistent worrying about upcoming events or situations that involve the fear of Monday.

What Everyday Signals set off the Fear of Monday
1. Seeing any picture showing some kind of “Monday”.
2. Watching any movie scene that shows “Monday”.
3. Listening to any song or music that has “Monday” in it.
4. Any person talking about or mentioning “Monday”.
5. Visiting any website that mentions anything about “Monday”.
6. Any other event, situation or person that resembles “Monday”.

Family members and friends must be aware that such signals will trigger off this fear of Monday in the person concerned and should be careful not to keep any of the above mentioned triggers, signs, symbols, etc. of “Monday” near the person suffering from this fear of Monday.

Fear of Monday Treatment
Consult a certified psychotherapist.

Fear of Monday Control and Prevention
Control this fear of Monday by not being around any events, situations or people that can trigger this fear or increase it until you get appropriate treatment for the fear of Monday. Discussing your fear of Monday openly with your therapist is crucial for successful treatment of the fear of Monday. If the mention of ‘Monday’ by someone sends chills down your spine then it’s time for you to consult a trained psychotherapist as quickly as possible.

Risky Career Options for People with the Fear of Monday
– Jobs where Monday is involved or anything which resembles or is connected to “Monday”.

Good Career Options for People with this Phobia
– Jobs where Monday is not involved or anything which resembles or is connected to “Monday” is not present.