Rafael, the bird, is flying over the street, when he spots Rosa, Raul´s mate.
He lands near her.
Rosa is desperate, looking for something.
Rafael: Hey Rosa.
Rosa: Oh Rafael, have you by any chance seen Raul?
Rafael: No. I haven´t seen him in days.
She sys in despair.
Rosa: He left this morning, to look for food and hasn´t come home yet. I´m worried sick!
Rafael looks to the side thinking.
He then looks back at Rosa.
Rafael: have you tried Francis´s place?
Rosa: You mean that flea bag?
Rafael: He´s okay.
Rosa: I honestly don´t know what it is with you two and that crazy cat.
Rafael: Look, at first I was suspicious of him too, but in all truth, he´s nice.
Rosa: Really?
Rafael: yeah, he´s harmless.
Rosa: then, where´s my Raul?
Rafael: I don´t know.
Francis steps outside into his backyard and spots the two talking.
He makes his way to them.
Cat: hey guys.
Rafael: hey fur ball.
Cat (annoyed): My name is Francis!
Rafael (mocking): Francis fur ball!
Cat: Ha, ha….
Rosa: Mr. Cat?
Cat: Please Rosa, cal me Francis.
Rosa: Okay…
Cat: Anyways, where´s Raul?
Rosa: Flew away on a magical pony.
Cat (surprised): Really?
Rosa looks at Raul, dumbstruck.
Raul shakes his head.
Rosa: anyways, Francis, have you seen Raul?
Cat: no.
Rosa: You said that last time as well. The truth was that Raul and this one here were hiding behind you drunken off their asses.
Cat: No, well… that was…
Rafael: Ha! Ha! Ha! Busted!
Cat (annoyed): How´s Luna?
Rafael´s smile fades.
Rafael: shut up!
Rosa: I´m serious. I´m really worried.
Cat: maybe he´s just out looking for food.
Rosa: and went where? Mars?
Cat (confused): That´s where exactly? Like two, three streets down?
Rosa (dumbstruck): are you serious?
Cat (confused): What?
Rafael just shakes his head.
Rosa: you truly are a weird cat.
Cat: what did I…
Francis stumbles backwards and stops talking.
His eyes go upwards and he looks nauseated.
Cat (complaining): Oh God…
Rafael: you okay pussycat?
Rosa backs away, fearfully.
Francis starts to convulse violently and then suddenly… a huge ball of fur comes out of his mouth.
Rafael looks at Francis disgusted.
Rafael: Jesus pussycat! What the hell did you eat?
Before Francis can answer him.
Rosa (yelling/in shock): Raul!
Cat/Rafael: what?
Rosa: You ate him! You ate my Raul! I knew you couldn´t be trusted!
Cat: I didn´t!
Rosa (weeping): You ate him…
Cat: I…
Rosa: all that fur…
Cat: is mine.
Rosa: stupid cat, your fur is white!
Cat: yes, and it has spent several hours in my stomach along with…
Rafael (interrupting/yelling): Raul!
Rosa starts to cry uncontrollably, ignoring Rafael.
Rosa (yelling): You ate the father of my children! You murderer!
Rosa starts to walk towards Francis, death glare in her eyes.
Rosa (fiercely): Murderer!
Francis backs away, fearfully.
Raul: Rosa, honey?
She stops and looks up to the sky.
Rosa: yes dear, I can hear you on the other side. Don´t worry, I´m going to avenge your death.
Raul: I´m not dead.
Rosa looks to the side to find Raul there, staring at her.
Rosa: Raul?
Raul: Hi honey.
Rosa (quietly): Are you a ghost?
Raul: No.
Rosa turns to Francis and Rafael.
Rosa: you see him too?
Rafael/Cat: yes.
Rosa: Oh okay…
Rosa starts to walk and gets as close to Raul as possible. She smacks him in the head.
Rafael and Francis open their eyes wide in shock.
Raul (bitching): Ouch! That hurt! What was that for?
Rosa: Ouch my butt, where the hell were you?
Raul: I was looking for food.
Rosa: yeah, yeah. You said that last time as well, and instead you were here, getting drunk, with this flea bag.
Rosa grabs Raul by his fur and drags him away with her.
She stops and doubles back.
Rosa: Thank you Francis.
Cat: I didn´t do anything.
Rosa: But you´re nice. Thank you.
Cat: You´re welcome, I guess…
She looks at Raul fiercely.
Rosa: let´s go!
She drags him away.
Cat: wow! That chick is intense.
Rafael: Oh yeah! I was afraid kitty cat! I was very afraid.
Cat (looks to the sides): Can I tell you a secret?
Rafael: sure.
Cat: So was I!
They both look at each other for a moment before they break out laughing.
Cat/Rafael: ha! Ha! Ha!
The end!
2017_ Joana Teixeira
