Son-of-Superstar’s Name, Image, Likeness Collector Offerings

Purchase personal Son-of-Superstar (S-O-S), basketball related products from can’t miss future baller before he turns two. Choose from the following offerings (* Prices Set; + Prices Negotiated):

• S-O-S Clean Diaper Dandy Memento (Authenticated Worn; in Glass Fame Looking like Backboard) *
• S-O-S Dirty (Pee Pee) Diaper Dandy Memento (Preserved, Uncontaminated, in Glass Frame as Above) *
• S-O-S Dirty (Poo-Poo) Diaper Dandy Memento (Preserved, Uncontaminated, in Glass Frame as Above) *
• S-O-S Appearance (In Person; in Uniform like Dad’s; Until Nap Time) +
• S-O-S Appearance (On Zoom; in Uniform like Dad’s; Napping) +
• S-O-S Appearance (On Zoom; in Uniform like Dad’s; Hip-Hopping) +
• S-O-S Appearance (Video; in Team Sweats like Dad’s; Warm-Up Drills) *
• S-O-S First Autograph Memento (Crayon – Printed, Sort Of) *
• S-O-S First Autograph Memento (Crayon – Cursive, Sort Of) *
• DNA: S-O-S’s Authenticated Baby Dribble Memento (Sealed in Basketball Shaped Container) *
• Images/Video: S-O-S’s First Step; First Euro Step; and First Jump Step *
• Image/Video of S-O-S Waving from Basketball Shaped Crib *
• Image/Video of S-O-S Jumping out of Basketball Court Playpen *
• Image/Video of S-O-S Surrounded by Litle Girls in Team Cheerleader Ou􀆞its *
• Image: S-O-S’s Authenticated First Basket: Tot Shot Toddler Basketball Hoop *
• Image: S-O-S’s Authenticated First Dunk: Tot Shot Toddler Basketball Hoop *
• Image: S-O-S’s Authenticated First Flush – At Toilet with Backboard Shaped Li􀅌ed Seat *
• Image: S-O-S Wearing Basketball Home Team Jersey Onesie with Dad’s Iconic Number *
• Image: S-O-S Wearing Basketball Visitors’ Jersey Onesie with Dad’s Iconic Number *
• Image: S-O-S Naked in Baby Bath Made to Look Like an Ice Tub [“S-O-S Already a Big Boy”] *
• Image: TREY, TRIFECTA; TRIPLE; Picture with S-O-S’s Three Litle Fingers Raised *
• 24 or 30 Second Shot Clock with Image of S-O-S on Poty, Encouraging Dropping a Quick Two *
• Door Frame Height Marker with Gradations up to Seven Feet, and Big-for-his-Age S-O-S Posed *
• S-O-S Baby Stroller with Image of S-O-S and Caption, “Never Get Whistled for Walking” *
• Memento: Baby Booties Looking Like S-O-S’s Dad’s Favorite Sneakers *
• Authenticated Copy of S-O-S Used Sneakers Modeled on Dad’s *
• “Heat Check” Baby Thermometer (Forehead, Mouth, or Old-School Rectal) with S-O-S image embossed *
• “Double-Double Bobblehead” – S-O-S’s Head and Ball Balanced on Index Finger Both Bobble *
• Sippy Cup Memento Shaped like Litle Larry O’Brien Trophy with S-O-S’s Name and Image *
• Bib with Image of Leaping S-O-S Blocking a Shot and the Caption, “No Throw-Downs on Me” *
• Heated Tummy Wrap (to Prevent Gas and Colic) with Image of S-O-S Ge􀆫ng Wrapped by Trainer Mom *
• Colorful toddler LCD Doodle Board with Wallpaper Image of S-O-S Dunking a Nerf Ball *
• Authenticated Black & White Striped S-O-S-Used Binky, Shaped Like Referee’s Whistle *
• Posed Image: S-O-S with Dad’s Team Mascot or Various and Sundry Pets * [+ Other Species Besides Mascot, Cat, Dog, or Caged Bird]
• “Blue Chip Scouting Report”: Based on S-O-S’s Latest Physical (Report Provided) and Ancestry Findings (Report Provided), Projections for S-O-S’s Tale-of-the-Tape and Special Skills and Abilities as Pro *
• “Posterizing Image” – S-O-S Throwing Down a Nerf Slam Dunk Over a Stuffed Animal of Your Choosing {Send Stuffie + or Choose from Our List *)

Bottom Line

S-O-S Will Pitch Any Product, Send Greeting to Anybody, Shill for Any Business, Shout-Out (literally) for Any High School or College Team, Include You as a Facebook Friend, Text You When First 25 Collegiate Recruitment Offers Get Made, or Almost Any Legally Defensible “Follow the Money” Opportunity

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