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Rejected Promotions for Major League Baseball’s 2018 Season

Los Angeles Dodgers

7th Inning Valet Giveaway

The first 200 fans get a ticket to have a valet pick up their car for them during the seventh inning stretch in order to beat the traffic of the other fans leaving during the seventh inning to beat the traffic home.

Chicago Cubs

Keep-Your-Shirt-On Double Header Challenge

Every fan over the age of 21 sitting in the bleachers gets a complimentary T-shirt. If they manage to keep it on for both games, it’s theirs to keep! Co-sponsored by Old Style.

Miami Marlins

Firesale Night

Fans may place a bid on any item in Marins Park and the highest bidder goes home with the item.*

*Item can be taken away and given to the Yankees at any point in the game, including your seat (you will be asked to stand)

Houston Astros

Hurricane Harvey Water Giveaway

Every fan is given a mop full of Hurricane Harvey left over from the lower tunnels of the stadium squeezed out into a one-gallon Ziploc bag to keep or dispose of off-site.

New York Yankees

Old Timey Fact Book Giveaway

Fans 12 and under get a book full of all the statistics they will need to know for players their fathers and grandfathers will be endlessly talking about while watching the game. With an introduction by Paul O’Neill.

Arizona Diamondbacks

American Citizen Family Day

ICE agents will be at all gates checking everyone’s citizenship* to make sure the game can be enjoyed by only American citizens. First pitch by former governor Jan Brewer!

*Does not apply to players

Detroit Tigers

Adopt an Abandoned Building Night

Upon entry, the first 1,000 fans are handed deeds to abandoned buildings around the city and a $10 gift card from Lowe’s to aid in beautification.

New York Mets

Jay-Z Night

An entire night to celebrate Jay-Z in the hope that he shows up so that a photo of him in a Mets hat gets on Getty Images and makes them look cool.

Tampa Bay Rays

Baseball Game

Somehow let the community know that there is a professional baseball team in town.

Cleveland Indians

Reparation Nights

Any attendee of Native American heritage can get the Chief Wahoo suite for a weekday home game at half price.*

*Life-sized Chief Wahoo will not be removed from the suite until the 2019 season.

Los Angeles Angels

Mike Trout Trout Mic Giveaway

A trout-shaped microphone that when you speak into it you sound like you are underwater with pre-programmed buttons that give tips on water conservation during a drought. Co-sponsored by the Los Angeles Department of Power and Water.

Washington Nationals

Cabinet Nights (Recurring)

Any current member of President Trump’s Cabinet is invited to throw out the first pitch. Time will be allotted for the pitch to be re-thrown before the 4th and the 8th innings, should that Cabinet member resign or be fired/indicted during the game.




The post Rejected Promotions for Major League Baseball’s 2018 Season appeared first on Robot Butt.



This post first appeared on Robot Butt | Purveyors Of Fine Comedy And Satire, please read the originial post: here

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Rejected Promotions for Major League Baseball’s 2018 Season

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