There ought to have meters when he has not known where he was in his own residence.
And there was also a disturbing escapade where he got off the bus to go to the Post Office he has used for the last 20 times, totally forgot what he was doing and began accompanying in the opposite direction.
“I didn’t know where I was. This was the first time[ it had happened ], ” he justifies, as we movie for the BBC’s Victoria Derbyshire Programme.
He has now been diagnosed as being in the early stages of mixed dementia – a combination of vascular dementia, caused by increased blood overflow to the brain, and Alzheimer’s.
Image copyright Family photo Image caption Rajan with his father
Sharing this openly is not the easiest thing to do, and I surely wouldn’t have done it without his full boon and co-operation.
To be honest, in spite of the diagnosis, it made a while for many of us to accept that he certainly had the condition.
But the fact is both his elder sisters died in their 80 s with advanced dementia, and British Asians are less likely to be diagnosed – and therefore be given the support they need – when they have the condition.
Image caption Sudhakar been applied to adore playing connect, horticulture and DIY, but has lost interest in them since developing the condition
Very few studies have been done in this area, but one – from 2014 – suggested that by 2051 there would be a sevenfold increase in the number of people from pitch-black, Asian and minority ethnic( BAME) backgrounds who would be reported to have dementia.
This compares with an estimated twofold rise from all the regions of the UK in the same period.
It is partly explained by the fact that many of the individuals who migrated to the UK at the same time as my father are now reaching older age.
South Asians are also more prone to diabetes, high blood pressure and hypertension, which means they are more likely to develop vascular dementia.
But there has also been a stigma surrounding dementia within the community that has stopped people striving diagnosis and help.
Significantly, there is no utterance for dementia in the majority Indian languages – instead it alters as a “mad” person.
My own pa said he didn’t go to the doctor initially because he “didn’t want to squander their go, they’re busy enough as it is”.
When he did, he was asked to specify 10 animals as part of a remember test – and was able to recall only two.
Image caption Charan Kaur Heer lives with an advanced constitute of dementia
According to one study, a third of elderly South Asians do not speak English and countless prefer the sanctuary of tabernacles or mosques to approaching care and health services.
That is the case with Charan Kaur Heer, whose spouse died with dementia eight years ago, and who is now in quite an advanced state of the condition.
“She does get very depressed, ” explains her daughter Manjeet Heer, a police constable in Ealing, west London.
“She has said to me that she’s just waiting to be taken, and how much she misses[ her husband ]. “
Image caption Manjeet Heer belief care for those with dementia should do more to prevent speech obstructions
Charan’s grandson, Ryan Sangar, is now her principal carer.
But because he does not speak Punjabi, his aunt must be used as a translator – via phone call – each time a member of the care services visits.
Manjeet says the NHS must do more to take into account word barriers and cultural inconsistencies – showing the need for literature, assessments and a helpline in languages such as Punjabi.
Dr Naaheed Mukadam, a elderly research peer at University College of London, says: “If more is not done to do parties cure sooner, this will lead to more crises and more hospitalisation.
“This is not only associated with increased distress for everyone, but also grows costs”.
Sit-down yoga
My mothers have come to terms with my dad’s plight, and are assembling it with their digesting stoicism.
“You have to put up with it, ” my pa tells me.
“Once you countenance it, you can deal with it, ” my mum adds.
But there are ways to help delay and alleviate its effects.
Drop-in centres run by the Ethnic Minority Advisory Group can now be found in a few areas of the UK, offer advice, social the operations and effort categorizes for local people.
Image caption Sudhakar took part in a sit-down yoga class aimed at preventing loneliness and sadnes
They aim to prevent loneliness and depression, and keep the knowledge and mas active.
What became clear to me is that these centres are invaluable lifelines for people who can be in horribly vulnerable positions.
Surinder Kaur, from the Whitton Day Centre in Middlesex, was clarified that “people come in full of rips, disgraceful – within weeks they are transformed”.
So I cannot tell you how chuffed I was when my dad agreed to go down to the centre to convene some other folk of similar age and background, and even take part in a sit-down yoga and dance class.
Mind you, subsequentlies he told me that it is not really his thing and he wants to try out tai chi instead.
Bring it on, I say.
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