I just got home from a long day at work, sweaty, tired and yes a little chafed. Few better ways to relax exist than feet up, AC 70 or below, boxers optional. Flipping through the channels, and it sneaks up on you like a wet fart in that big lecture hall you used to have bio in freshman year, yea the one with great acoustics. The damn ITT Tech commercial. Every guy in these commercials spends Thirty Seconds or less telling us how awesome his new IT job is. This would be all well and good if the techy drone position they describe didn’t sound so mind numbing that you’d be begging for a lobotomy by lunch on the first day. Cue a few shots of newfound IT genius doing something all us normal non-IT folk don’t have the extravagant salary for. Example: riding a straight off the pawn shop lot on a  motorcycle or cruising around in a busted ass johnboat. Having trouble containing the urge to start your application to this heavensent establishment for higher education? Don’t worry there’s more. If the high rolling adrenaline pumping office rat life style haven’t lured you in, then one look at the trailer park trophy wife on this winners arm will. The least they could do is not fade this thirty seconds of sheer bliss out with a close up of the bucktoothed fat chick’s grill. Here’s a suggestion. If you have the option of sitting through one of these commercials or being on the receiving end of the first round of roshambo…grit your teeth and grab a bag of ice, you can thank me later.

From Guest Writer: Perpetual Student