HOW TO MAKE A DEAL:
- GET YOUR EMOTIONS IN CHECK: Remaining calm is vital to good negotiation. Kids are especially good at reading emotions & any negative or heightened emotion will work against you.
- HEAR THEM OUT: Give them a chance to explain where he is coming from, what he wants, & how he is willing to compromise.
- CONSIDER THEIR POINT OF VIEW: Now that you’ve heard what she has to say take a moment or two to really contemplate her feelings.
- EXPLAIN YOUR POINT OF VIEW: This is your opportunity to expound on your parenting philosophy & let your child know what you think & why.
- TEACH: It’s really easy to abuse our parental power by bossing & being demanding with our children, but that doesn’t do anyone any good. In a negotiation we have the opportunity to teach our children about compromise, empathy, team work, considering others, & ultimately appropriate ways to get what they want.
- NEGOTIATE:
- Brainstorm possible solutions together: be sure to recommend acceptable solutions but also encourage your child to come up with a few ideas.
- Find something you can both agree on: there is almost always a middle ground. Remember it requires a little give & take on both sides.
- Sometimes it’s okay to let your child win.
- DISCIPLINE: While the goal is to come to a mutual agreement don’t forget that you do have the final say. It’s best to work with your kids but that isn’t always the answer. Sometimes we have to exercise our authority & just do what is best for our children if an acceptable agreement couldn’t be made.
So next time your child asks for a new bike or an Oreo milkshake before dinner use these steps & see if you can strike a deal.
We love to share tips that have saved our lives as parents. While there is no parenting manual, there are methods, tried and true, that can make a huge difference in preserving our sanity as parents. Check out a few of our favorite parenting tips that work well for us:
Parenting Tip: How I got my children to listen without ever saying a word
5 Parenting Tips Your Toddler Wants You to Know
Household Chore Ideas for Kids – 9 Creative Ways to Put Your Kids to Work
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