I married a really great guy. When I think about how wonderful my Husband is, I smile and feel very blessed to have him. He's my soul mate, confidant, and best friend. I LOVE him!
This guy does it for me! For him I want to be the greatest wife!
But... according to what I've just found out, I am a DISRESPECTFUL WIFE!
Are YOU wives disrespecting YOUR MAN too?
If you check out my previous post of summer readings, you'd see a book called The Fruit Of Her Hands by Nancy Wilson (not the singer). The author touches on respect for one's husband and what it does and doesn't look like.
I was thinking, 'Oh I’m going to breeze through this respect chapter.' And I started mentally striking off her examples; I don't talk to hubs as if he's a child, I don't complain about him to friends, I do pray for him, he truly can trust me, etc, etc.
But then I came upon another example she regards as disrespect, and found I was as guilty as OJ on a Freeway!
If you happened to have read some of my previous posts you're aware that I've been job hunting. It's mentioned in my KFC post, and my clothing post, saying how I don't have much money to purchase a lot of things for myself.
Here's the connection: according to N. Wilson this is disrespectful to my husband! According to her I am telling everyone that my man is not providing for the lifestyle I want. According to her I am letting my slip show just from those bits of sharing, and according to her I am displaying a complaining spirit- where not coincidently my husband is the bad guy. I'm like Whoa! Wait a minute Nancy! You don't know me from Eve.... well, Umm, you know what I saying!
I had to mull her points over. My marriage is too important not to.
She mentions that disrespecting one's husband can even be the case if you're discussing your personal business with your Mother or good friend. And I'm thinking if not them, than to whom can a wife
She doesn't mention blogs specifically, but says:
"It can apply to many things, but the general idea is this: sometimes private things that ought not to be shared are shard in full view of the public." (pg.44)
I know that's right because I have read some blogs where wives say personal things about their husbands and I think... 'Does he know that she's sharing that?' From light stuff like how smelly he is, to how he doesn't help around the house, to bigger things and in detail that I can't mention here. And I have to say, those are usually the blogs I don't follow.
"Am I saying that women can never share their troubles? Yes and no. A wife should share her troubles with her husband's blessing, in a way that is honoring to both God and her husband." (pg.45)
Do you agree with this?
Do you think some bloggers go overboard with sharing?
Any chance that you also have possibly gone overboard with sharing?
Wilson's point is a big pill to swallow, and it's taken a few days for me to get it down, but I got it down. I never want to be disrespectful to my other self. Yes, although money is a bit tight, he's a very hard working man (two jobs) and doesn't put pressure on me to contribute financially. He supports me in everything I do, and actually there's nothing to complain about.
Imagine this:
Imagine you mosey on over to your husbands blog, and you see he's posted pictures of Shilpa Shetty or Megan Fox or Gabourey Sidibe or Eva Longoria or Beyonce (anyone who doesn’t look anything like you) and they’re nicely featured on his blog and called “yummy” or “his crush” or what he "fancies." How would that make you feel?
Imagine you also see on your husband’s blog, a post about how you left your panties on the bathroom floor last week, or that you left your child in the supermarket by mistake last year and now he's secretly watching what you do. How would you feel?
Imagine you check out some of the comments he's been leaving on other people's blogs, saying how beautiful their family and their home is and how he wishes his home could look like theirs. How would you feel?
Imagine he says how ugly he is, and that he needs to look better, cook better, clean better, letting everyone know that your spouse is a louse. Is that him telling your business also? How would you feel?
I'd say finding these things wouldn't feel very nice at all.
So is it only ok if a woman says them?
Whether you agree with Nancy Wilson or not, one has to say she does make an important point to ponder, whether we are disrespecting our mate purposly or unaware. Let's not be a part of the Disrespect Your Husband CLub.
Proverbs 10-12 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.
She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.
I know my husband might pop his head in and read this post, as he visits from time to time, and I love it. Hubs, you should know that I love and respect you, and you can trust me, and I will be mindful of these things because I love US! You're a hard working man who loves the Lord, and his wife! And I'm very thankful. Big Hugs!!! :D
