I want to get back to, as much as my cynical self can, being a positive, glass half full type of woman. I could give some hard core concrete reasons why I am so cynical but honestly it doesn’t make me any better as a person, mother, daughter, sister or friend. So this year I’ve decided that I will not wait until Thanksgiving or some life changing event to express and mentally be grateful/thankful for all of my blessings, teachings, and loved ones.
My goal is to write about something or someone I am grateful for at least twice a week. Hopefully by next month it will be a habit that inspires me and when the glass starts to seem half empty the shift back to the positive will be a whole lot easier…
I’ll begin with a bitterly cold day in Detroit. In my part of this city its hit or miss for those who shovel their walkways and in front of their homes. On this day my middle son needed to be picked up from School. Prior to this I had decided that my cell bill could wait in favor of another priority so I had no way of trying to find a ride. This meant I had to walk. Thia also meant that my 2 year old would be accompanying me in his stroller. So I set out to pick up my son from school pushing his brother in a stroller through the Snow.
Now I don’t know if by me saying this that you can get an accurate picture of what that’s like. For me it was like lifting 30 pound weights repeatedly.
By shear will I pushed, pulled and sometimes dragged my baby and his stroller to and from my son’s school. This walk, that usually took me 30 mins tops, took me an hour. By the time I made it home my chest was constricted and for the 1st time since I was a teenager I was on the verge of an asthma attack. Or should I say what I remember them feeling like.
After throwing up, drinking hot coffee to calm my breathing (a trick I learned from my mom) I fell asleep exhausted.
Fast forward to a couple of days later, a new snow had fallen and again I found myself in a simiular situation. I hadn’t heard from my son’s dad or my brother so I believed that once again I was going to pushing the stroller through the snow. I immediately started praying with this realization. But as it neared the dismissal time my prayers went unanswered.
So although I dreaded it I bundled myself & my baby up and headed out. Before I could get to the end of my block my chest began constricting again and I was struggling to breathe normally. See this time I was fighting high winds and snow that was more like ice because of the sleet that had fallen earlier. In defeat I turned around and headed back home. Each step was a fight and I was in agony. I knew there was no way I could make it to my kid’s school and back.
Once I got in the house I started to panic. My mind was racing with worry as I reasoned that my son’s teacher would call his dad but would he be able to pick him up when he was at work all the way across town? Before I could get both my baby and myself unbundled I heard the familar rumble of the boy’s father’s work truck. And as I opened the door out stepped my son and his dad.
You see in that moment I realized that my prayers were heard and answered. And although it might not seem like a big deal to the next person, the gratefulness I felt at that moment was so uplifting. My worrying and my physical pain was all because of my impatience and the need I have to try and control circumstances instead of having faith. I’ll let you in on a little secret which might give you a better understanding of my previous statement. I FELT that I was making the wrong decision going out that day. I inately KNEW that thi gs were going to work out as they did. Crazy, huh?
So I am very GRATEFUL for my lesson in remembering that prayer is powerful. That I am not invincible. And that we haver inner dialogues & intution for a reason.
I hope this story was inspiring for yout to see that there are so many things, even butt kickings, to be grateful for. Do you have any stories of your own that uniquely taught you a lesson in gratefulness? Share in the comments or on our Facebook page.