Those of us who spend enough time in therapy, bit by bit, sort out our real wishes.

We want to be loved. Appreciated, supported, listened to, and valued, but it has to be the way we really are.

That’s us at our very best anyway!

We all have a lot to give. Important things.

Giving only what others demand provides no reward for us though. Only despair and sadness!

WHAT DO WE WANT?

When we allow life to be powered from within, we get back the good stuff that we all secretly long for.

Love, trust, honor, responsibility, feeling powerful, and feeling good, all returns to people.

When we force life to do as we say instead though, all these qualities disappear.

Life is supposed to come from within!

It’s designed to survive through it’s own efforts.

It can’t successfully work any other way.

OUR INSTINCTS

Our needs and instincts tell us to value others and seek acceptance and support through our behavior.

Our instincts also tell us to encourage and support the independance of our offspring.

Any of us isolated from peer pressure would naturally parent this way. We would encourage and support, not redirect.

And it works. We get the lives we crave.

But, few of us can feel our instincts or our needs!

A CRAZY PLACE

Our world has become a crazy place.

Needs, feelings, and instincts have vanished from awareness and expression!

How did this happen?

We don’t nurture any more.

We don’t support our offspring in their own development!

We tell them how to develop instead!

EVERYTHING GOOD COMES FROM WITHIN!

Life cannot survive if it cannot feel it’s own driving power.

It will fail! It will crash! It’s doing that! All around us!

WE NEED OUR INSTINCTS

That’s our wisdom! Our guidance! Our sense of right and wrong! Our insight into what will work, and what won’t.

WE NEED TO BE ABLE TO FEEL OUR OWN NEEDS!

We need acceptance and support with every cell of our bodies.

But, we can’t even feel that.

Therefore we behave like idiots! We work against our own happiness!

Look at the world now! People are unhappy! They are hostile!

WE NEED OUR FEELINGS!

We have lost our joy.

We don’t sit around and sing together anymore.

We don’t cherish each other!

We compete!

We protect ourselves, and climb the ladder to be important!

Once we become important, there is no joy!

It’s a failure! We couldn’t feel what we really needed, and we failed at providing our own happiness.

EXCEPT FOR A FEW OF US!

There are some who can feel their inner lives.

They don’t look for power or status.

They look for comfort, acceptance, trust, and love.

These are the successful ones!

They actually succeed at happiness.

THIS IS THE ONLY GOAL THAT ACTUALLY SATISFIES!

Everybody else may have material posessions.

They may control the world!

But they hurt! They live in anxiety! They crave drugs or approval!

They live in isolation, fear, and hostility!

The have all failed at satisfying their own needs!

That’s what happens when they can’t feel those needs!

WHAT TO DO?

The very best thing that any of us can do for ourselves is to reconnect as much as we can with our own inner lives!

Our inner drive and feelings of power!

Our feelings!

Connection withour own needs!

Connection with our instincts! That’s our wisdom.

We should never have lost any of that!

We should allow our young to keep their connection with the most valuable part of their lives.

They need to live from their own power and succeed through their own efforts.

That’s all they ever wanted anyway. We will discover that if we allow it.

Given that, they will help in every way they can, and love us to death. Real love! Not just words!

Our natural language is feelings.

Can any of us express feelings?

Music is the closest most of us can get, and our music is getting darker!

That shows us the present condition of most people’s feelings, even if they can’t feel them directly.

We are not heading in a good direction.

This condition will continue to worsen if we don’t allow our inner lives back into play!

Thanks for listening.

Good luck on your own journey.

This post is part of https://clarity-of-innocence.com

Take care,

Norm Cormier

The post What do we all really want? first appeared on Clarity of Innocence.