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Depression Is Not My Boss Blog


myconcealeddepression.com
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For 43 years, I lied to myself about having depression. Now I face it and blog about mental health topics including; coping statements, unhelpful thinking, core emotions, self-care, and more. If you or someone, you know needs help, call 1-800-273-8255 for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. You can also text HOME to 741-741 for free, 24-hour support from the Crisis Text Line.
2024-02-24 02:40
Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash I have asked myself “why can’t I laugh out loud anymore? The whole idea of laughing is not part of my daily routine. In fact, it is not a part… Read More
2024-02-21 15:50
Photo by Nik on Unsplash Yesterday I read an article whose theme was “I am just not good enough.” This piqued my curiosity, as I have been wondering if I am just not good enough… Read More
2024-02-19 13:43
Photo by Pro Church Media on Unsplash My Gratitude Journal for Today – Going back and fixing these after they are written would be easy to do. However, all I did was correct spelling e… Read More
2024-02-12 14:43
Photo by Amer Mughawish on Unsplash Lately, it seems like I am either gearing up for my depression to take over or I am coming down from my depression. I am all in or shrinking away. It seem… Read More
2024-02-10 16:13
Photo by Kristina Tripkovic on Unsplash Is depression remission even a thing? And what makes me think that I am not doing ok with my depression? Do I really have a lot of questions about whe… Read More
2024-02-03 04:15
Photo by K. Mitch Hodge on Unsplash I feel like I’ve been here before. It’s the same impulsive “this time it will be different” kind of thoughts. Am I fooling myself… Read More
2024-01-15 14:24
Photo by Jonathan Knepper on Unsplash Today is a federal holiday. It is MLK day and everything federal is closed. A lot of businesses, well at least the home offices of these businesses, are… Read More
2024-01-13 15:19
Photo by Adrian Hartanto on Unsplash I am using a lot of cliches recently. What I am trying to understand as we go into 2024, is whether I am moving in tune with the times? It is easy for me… Read More
2024-01-01 15:51
So, this is what I am thinking about and am grateful for as 2024 begins. ‘ I will do my best to remember these as I go through the year. I am very optimistic about 2024 and see so many… Read More
2023-12-31 17:29
Today is December 31st, and the year has basically ended. I for one should have seen it coming. Even before January 1, 2023 came, I was flying across the Atlantic Ocean on my way to Tanzania… Read More
2023-11-04 16:10
I’ve had four or five days of positiveness. I’m not sure that is a word, but it’s how I have been feeling.  Even yesterday, at work, I had the feeling that everything… Read More
2023-09-19 14:18
A time to remember the lives lost to suicide, the millions who have struggled with suicidal thoughts & the individuals, families, and communities that have been impacted. Today I am… Read More
2023-09-02 14:08
Photo by mauro mora on Unsplash It turns out that I don’t even know when the last time was that I sat down and wrote out my thoughts and feelings. I wish I had made the time as I know… Read More
2023-08-14 13:25
What would I do? How would I think? What would I spend my time doing? Firstly, I need to factor in my diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder with suicidal ideation. Figuring out how to manag… Read More
2023-07-10 02:19
Photo by Kayla Warner on Unsplash Another post about my lifelong struggle to face major depressive disorder (concealed depression) They say you always remember your first time. Well with my… Read More
2023-05-29 12:22
Many years ago, on Memorial Day, our children would march in the local parade in New Jersey. The weather was always suspect. The kids would be wearing their soccer or band uniforms, or the o… Read More
2023-03-28 13:51
Photo by Kaysha on Unsplash My checklist has items on it I did not complete. I have only checked off three. But I also policed the front and back yards for dog poo and then mowed the backyar… Read More
2023-03-10 18:24
Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash I want to say that I have figured it out and have all of the answers. If I could say, “I understand what and why,” that would be amazing. An… Read More
2023-03-01 01:06
Should it just be the facts, or can I add how I am feeling? After all, it has been nearly 4 years since I was in 5 East. Almost 4 years since I faced my depression and said out loud, “… Read More
2023-02-22 14:18
It seemed like such a good idea when my psychiatrist and I discussed it. Reducing my daily Wellbutrin from 450 mg. to 300 mg. seemed like a no-brainer. After all, winter has been mild, and t… Read More
2023-02-10 14:15
Wait, wait, don’t tell me. (Thank you PBS) I have it right on the tip of my tongue. It was clear as day just a moment ago. Now that I want to talk about it, I cannot think of what it w… Read More
2023-02-09 02:37
Depression helped me retire the first time, making a cluster of the entire experience. My depression convinced me to scrap over 40 years of planning and jump into retirement with only a sket… Read More
2023-01-25 03:21
I wish I could say yes to joy, to being happier. There are many emotions I am familiar with, but joy and happiness are rarely one of them. OK is the operative word. If someone asks how I am… Read More
2022-12-10 02:40
It’s seems such an easy thing, for everyone has an idea of what their own joy looks like. So why is it I cannot feel the emotion? Instead, I play defense and do anything I can to avoid… Read More
2022-11-09 22:03
Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash It still amazes me that I am allowed to take care of myself. The whole idea of putting on one’s own oxygen mask before helping others has been foreign to… Read More
2022-11-08 22:01
Photo by Martin Sanchez on Unsplash It had always seemed just a matter of time. Even with all the precautions, vaccines, boosters, masks, deep cleaning, and social distancing, the odds were… Read More
2022-10-22 16:09
Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash Next Wednesday, before I go to work, I have an appointment with my new medicine management psychiatrist. I am not nervous about the visit, but I am curious… Read More
2022-10-01 17:08
I should have known better than to rush the morning so I could leave on time. After all, this trip is a mini vacation. But sleeping in until almost 7 AM, I felt like I had a lot to do to lea… Read More
2022-09-07 15:07
I have experienced all of the other emotions over the past 40 months. Having been introduced to the change triangle by a therapist.  I now refer to it, but I don’t always think ab… Read More
2022-09-02 14:33
Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash I was going to drive 3 hours to a celebration of life. Dave had graduated 2 years ahead of me, but I knew him initially through a mutual friend. After a yea… Read More
2022-07-28 02:46
Photo by Towfiqu barbhuiya on Unsplash Last night, it seemed like a logical question to ask. I began to ponder it and play out the ramifications in my head. There must have been a reason why… Read More
2022-07-15 13:02
It’s called a day off for a reason. However, for me, it is a race to get everything done in the 15 hours I will be awake. I focus on the day part, a day without going to work. But I co… Read More

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