People from Maine are coming here to Massachusetts to get flu shots.

They just showed on the news, a few minutes ago, a woman from Maine who drove all the way to a FREE FLU CLINIC in Dorchester.

Apparently, the fact that Massachusetts allows gays to marry has not “tainted” the HINI vaccine here. Hopefully, the good folks up in Maine who are coming to The Bay State for flu shots are NOT the ones who were so busy agitating to outlaw gay marriage…they had no time to agitate for free flu shots IN their area.

Naturally, securing flu shots for their area is obviously NOT as important as stopping gays from getting married. I understand that. What I don’t get is why come to Massachusetts? Why not go to Texas or some other gay-hating place where the vaccines are gay-free?

I’ve been living here BEFORE and since gays won the right to marry - and so far I’ve NOT noticed a difference in my life that I can attribute to gays.

Well, maybe I spoke too soon. I noticed that as soon as we gave gays the go-ahead to marry, my teenage son decided that he should NOT be asked to wash dishes and that if he does, he should ONLY be made to wash those that HE used!

Our unemployment rate has climbed. I am sure that is somehow the fault of gays. I just can’t figure out the connection, but I’m sure there are people who can. Because I am convinced that we would have weathered the economic crash…if only WE HAD NOT ALLOWED GAYS TO MARRY.

I still see people getting divorced and others shacking up together with NO intention of marrying. I BLAME GAYS FOR THAT! If we had NOT allowed gays to marry, Massachusetts would be the land of June Cleaver.

Indeed, we were well on our way with the Romney’s. Stay-home mom. Cute brood of kids. Bevy of groomed grandkids. But no, we had to go and let gays get married. The Romney’s left!

Now what do we have? Divorces, alimony battles, neglected kids, an overburdened foster care system. That’s what you get when you let gays marry!

Failing schools. Another repercussion from gays getting married. Need I explain how that happens? Gay teachers suddenly started coming out and openly dating kids. Kids start exploring gay lifestyles and say: to heck with school and studies. Our MCAS (Massachusetts Comprehensive Assessment System) scores headed to damnation.

From the moment we decided to let gays marry, people started having abortions in alleyways. Yep…even animals had more abortions! Heterosexual couples reasoned: if gays can’t have kids – why should we? So they started aborting their pregnancies.

In fact, so many things went wrong in Massachusetts since we let gays start marrying that dwelling on them are just … too painful.

So I tell the good folks up in Maine: thank God, YOU saw the light. You decided to uphold the sanctity of marriage. And so, there will be NO more kids born out of wedlock in Maine. No more abortions. No more divorces. No fornication. No ads from people in Maine looking for unusual sexual liaisons…

Every person will marry. Couples will be enfolded in a loving relationship for life, produce healthy, well-adjusted kids…who are likely to become missionaries who will then come down to Massachusetts and convert us.

96 percent of Maine’s population is white…and the few non-whites will leave.

Kids up there will no longer live in poverty…and life will be just loverly!

According to the 1999 US Census figures for Maine:

10-percent of Maine’s population earned less than 10-thousand dollars. That will change dramatically. In the new world of no-gay-marriage Maine, by the 2010 census, that figure will dramatically drop to just 2-percent.

1 percent of Mainers make 200-thousand-dollars or more. More people will now rapidly join that group…now that gays can no longer marry and break the family structures that prevented them from achieving and earning.

7.8 percent of families live below the poverty level. That will drop.

28 percent of families with female householder, no husband present, live below the poverty level. No husband present? Maine has households with NO husband present? The only explanation is that these women must be gay!

11 percent of individuals live below the poverty level. They’re gay too. Otherwise they would all be millionaires.

Here are some figures for MAINE from the National Center for Children in Poverty:

15% (40,952) of children live in poor families
33% (13,532) of children in poor families do not have an employed parent
57% (6,512) of children whose parents don't have a high school diploma live in poor families.
65% (26,788) of children in poor families live with a single parent.
18% (14,762) of children, under age 6, live in poor families.
13% (26,190) of children, age 6 or older, live in poor families
5% (1,937) of poor children live in families with no parent present.
2% (4,074) of children (who are not poor) live in families with no parent present.

Now that MAINERS HAVE VOTED TO STOP GAYS FROM MARRYING, that state will now rapidly begin to prosper and change for the better.

Just sit back and watch their GDP shoot past ours. And then all you LIBERAL MASSACHUSETTS denizens will rue the day – yes, sackcloth and ashes – you let gays marry here!