"An old video game console? Really? But it's so, old..."

If you're anything like a real human being, you've probably never heard these sentiments uttered by anyone, ever. Why's that?

Partly, it's because the fury it invokes is powerful enough to huff, puff, and blow the offender right out of the room. Secondly, it's because retro game Consoles rock so hard that there are no legitimate objections to collecting and playing them.