Seinfeld is an Emmy award-winning television series co-created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld. Somehow they make standing around in a Chinese restaurant for a half-hour entertaining.
Comedian Jerry Seinfeld plays a fictional version of himself with an eccentric supporting cast. George Costanza is the most neurotic of the bunch and is responsible for side-splitting laughter.
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Sadly, from angering the Soup Nazi to advising Corbin Benson and George Wendt backstage on The Tonight Show, George often rubs people the wrong way.
Perhaps the worst is when he uses the memory of Susan and her picture to pick up women in “The Bizarro Jerry,” among other storylines. Nonetheless, he is often relatable and somehow lovable.
George as Art Vandelay From Vandelay Industries
Like when he wanted to stay on unemployment, so he created an alias Art Vandelay from Vandelay Industries. He did so to embellish his lie about going on interviews to appease the lady at the unemployment office.
Unfortunately for George, that scam lands him face down with his pants around his ankles. It’s classic Costanza. With so many outlandish moments, we put together a montage of his most memorable scenes.
Please enjoy these laugh-out-loud moments reminiscing with the “Lord of the Idiots” monumental flashbacks to a 90s comedy series icon. They are in no particular order because they are all so good.
Seinfeld is available to binge on Netflix. So in the words of Frank Costanza,” It's a Festivus for the rest of us!”
1. When George Becomes a Hand Model “The Puffy Shirt.”
“The Puffy Shirt” is a Seinfeld season five classic. When George is out to dinner with his parents, he accidentally bumps into a woman, knocking her purse from her grip.
She takes notice of his hands and offers him a hand modeling job. It's not selling feet pics, but it makes a living. After Kramer (Michael Richards) shakes George's hand with a toy buzzer, he freaks out.
Next, he covers his hands with oven mitts to protect them and heads to his gig. Later, he is home with his parents, who are bickering back and forth. Before leaving the room, he announces, “Stress is very damaging to the epidermis!”
Ultimately, George runs hands first into a steaming hot iron, and his hand modeling career is over before it starts. “You don't have to worry about me. I won a contest.”
2. When George Dodges a Break-up “The Susie.”
We see George Costanza at his best in “The Susie.” He has invited Allison to the ball at his work. So naturally, Costanza is excited to show off his tall, beautiful date and dreams of twirling her in their grand entrance.
However, he realizes that she is attempting to break up with him. So he employs the tactic, “If she can't find me, she can't break up with me.” In a hilarious scene, George is screening his calls and eating popcorn on his couch.
The phone rings, and we hear, “Believe it or not, George isn't at home. Please leave a message at the beep. I must be out, or I'd pick up my phone. Where could I be? Believe it or not, I'm not home.”
Remember answering machines? Well, his ditty is quite possibly the best answering machine message ever.
3. When George Gets Banned From Paisanos “The Calzone.”
One day, in a work meeting, George eats an eggplant calzone from a local Italian spot called Paisanos. Unfortunately, his boss, George Steinbrenner (Larry David), is an eccentric and over-the-top character.
He insists George immediately get him a couple of calzones and dismisses the meeting. Naturally, George complies. However, when he drops his tip money into the jar, the employee doesn't witness it.
So George takes his money back out as the employee turns and assumes he is stealing his tips. Paisanos bans George, and as luck would have it, Steinbrenner demands an eggplant calzone from there for lunch daily.
Costanza panics about being unable to deliver lunch and states that Steinbrenner “fires people like it's a bodily function!” Eventually, George employs Newman (Wayne Knight) to pick them up on his mail route.
Even so, Newman doesn't work in the rain, and George desperately begs Kramer to help him. It's one of the funniest Seinfeld episodes from the seventh season.
4. When George Wasn't the Master of His Domain “The Contest.”
In “The Contest,” a mortified George Costanza joins the gang at their usual table at Monk's cafe. He informs them that his mother, Estelle (Estelle Harris), walked in on him “treating his body like an amusement park.”
As a result, she fell and threw her back out. This admission leads to the foursome making a bet on who can go the longest without gratifying themselves. Unquestionably, George has immediate difficulty when he visits his mom in the hospital.
Unfortunately, with nothing between him and the other room but a sheer curtain, George is distracted by the sponge bath visuals and verbal exchange. It's a total cringe moment with his mom being right there.
Somehow, George wins the contest. Or, he allows us to believe that until his series finale confession.
5. When George Gets Choked by “The Bubble Boy.”
Elaine Benes (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) obligates Jerry to a home visit with Donald, “The Bubble Boy.” He is on the way to the cabin they're going to for the weekend. However, lead-foot George accidentally loses Jerry on the freeway.
So he arrives at the house before they do. George and Susan Ross (Heidi Swedberg) play the board game Trivia Pursuit with the Bubble Boy to pass the time. Unfortunately, Donald is angry, rude, and condescending without provocation.
So when the card has a misprinted answer, George doesn't honor the truth. As a result, the Bubble Boy strangles George, while Susan inadvertently pops his bubble.
Then, as Donald is on a stretcher, George exclaims, “It's Moops!” Donald yells back on his way to the ambulance, “It's Moors!” It's a classic example of George's pettiness and a laugh-out-loud moment. It's a fourth-season favorite.
6. When George Uses Laura to Spy “The Lip Reader.”
“The Lip Reader” begins with George hoovering an ice cream sundae at a tennis game. Incidentally, it's all over his face and broadcasted on the big screen. The next day, George's girlfriend Gwen breaks up with him.
However, George quickly interrupts her excitedly, shouting, “You're giving me the “it's not you, it's me” routine? I invented “it's not you, it's me!” Nobody tells me it's them, not me! If it's anybody, it's me.”
It's one of his most hysterical exchanges. In addition, Jerry Seinfeld is dating a deaf lineswoman from the tennis match named Laura (Marlee Matlin).
She reads lips and agrees to attend a party George's ex-girlfriend Gwen will be at to read her lips and discover if the ice cream was the cause of the break-up. Indeed, things go awry when she mistakes “sweep” with “sleep.”
7. When George Pretends To Be Disabled “The Butter Shave.”
In the season nine opener, George interviews for a new job at “Play Now.” However, because he is temporarily using a cane due to “The Summer of George,” the boss (Gordon Jump) thinks he is disabled.
So to ensure there's no discrimination, the boss assures him he is an equal. In addition, he gets a private bathroom to accommodate his disability. So George plays along. They also accommodate him with a motorized stair lift and scooter.
It's chucklesome when he beeps the horn at Jerry. His face has a laugh-out-loud look after George dents a scooter on the sidewalk. He jumps on his scooter to escape, and a fleet of seniors on scooters pursue him.
George's boss catches him faking his disability when he witnesses him pick up his scooter and run away from the seniors with it. George asks, “Are you a religious man, sir?” However, he is not, and the jig is up.
The following episode is also gut-busting when he calls the receptionist after crawling through the vent to get to his office. He speaks, “Hello Marjorie, George Costanza. How are you, sweetheart? Listen, can you give Mr. Thomassoulo a message for me? If he needs me, tell him: I'm IN MY OFFICE!”
8. When George Becomes a Genius “The Abstinence.”
In “The Abstinence,” George's girlfriend Louise (Tamara Bick) has mononucleosis, so they cannot engage in adult relations for six weeks. Initially, George is apprehensive, but he ends up enjoying the night he spends talking with Louise.
Suddenly, he becomes more intelligent as a side effect of not having relations. For example, he knows the answers to Jeopardy‘s questions. Elaine finds him sitting with a bunch of books studying.
In addition, he begins speaking Portuguese. When Louise discovers she never had mono and can sleep with him, George chooses intelligence instead. Soon, however, he gives in to a Portuguese waitress and returns to being an idiot immediately.
9. When George Leaves a Toxic Message “The Phone Message.”
George has a beautiful time with his date Carol (Tory Polone) but mistakes her midnight coffee invite as a literal invitation. So he explains that he can not have coffee late at night or won't be able to sleep.
Afterward, George realizes she was insinuating spending a night together and obsesses about his refusal. Next, he experiences four days of leaving voicemails without any response.
By the fourth day, he explodes into a long rage-filled message. Well, it turns out Carol was in the Hamptons and didn't have access to the machine.
So George devises a plan with Jerry to swap out her answering machine tape before she can hear his messages. They're successful, but Carol had already heard them.
Her neighbor played them for her, and she thought he was joking. Crisis averted. It's a second-season favorite, “Tippy-toe! Tippy-toe!”
10. When George Thinks It Moved “The Note.”
In this third-season classic, George discovers his massage therapist is a man. So he's apprehensive and asks Elaine to switch. But she doesn't want a man to massage her either.
George hesitantly accepts his massage with Raymond (Jeff Lester). However, he panics when it's time to remove his pants to access his hamstring.
Raymond asks George several questions, to which he nervously repeats what Raymond is saying rather than answering the questions.
Afterward, George talks to Jerry, informing him that Raymond rubbed about two inches from his member. George obsesses over the fact that he thinks his member moved during the massage.
It's a funny take on how ridiculous homophobia is and the misconceptions straight men have about being gay. Seinfeld addresses it in his stand-up comedy clip after the show.
11. When George Knocks Down Women and Children “The Fire.”
George is dating a woman named Robin (Melanie Chartoff), and her kid is having a birthday party. She asks George to hire a clown, so he hires “Eric the Clown.”
As a result, Costanza spends most of the birthday party harassing him for not knowing who Bozo the Clown is. He's relentless about it and cannot comprehend how he can even call himself a clown without knowing who Bozo is.
Eventually, Eric responds, “You're hung up on some clown from the 60s, man!” Then, after noticing smoke in the kitchen, George screams, “Fire!” before knocking down women and children to get to the door. Including Robin and her senior mother using a walker.
It's classic George Costanza.
12. When George Fishes for Marble Rye “The Rye.”
The Costanza's bring a loaf of marble rye to meet and dine with the Ross family before George and Susan's wedding. When the Ross's don't serve it, the Costanza's take it back.
George is embarrassed and insists his parents didn't steal the bread. So he devises a plan. He sends them on a hansom cab ride to create an opportunity to sneak a new rye loaf into the house.
Kramer has been feeding the horse, Rusty, Costco-sized cans of Beefareeno. Rusty has nauseating gas, and they demand to turn around and go home.
Because they arrived home early, George didn't have time to perform the theft. So he has Jerry hook the bread on a fishing pole and tries to reel it upstairs through a window. Unfortunately for George, the Ross family catches him in a laugh-out-loud moment.
13. When George Was in the Pool “The Hamptons.”
George dates Jane (Melora Walters) and takes her to the Hamptons for their first time together. However, he is despondent to learn that the gang saw her topless on the beach before he's seen her naked.
After a swim in the pool, George changes when Jerry's girlfriend Rachel (Melanie Smith) walks in on him naked. She laughs and apologizes. Reiterating, “I'm really sorry.”
George frantically alerts her that he was in the pool and is unaware if she knows about “Shrinkage.” Finally, at dinner, Rachel whispers in Jane's ear, and they both laugh.
Despite insisting that it's nothing, Jane packs up to return to New York City before bedtime. So naturally, George assumes that her talk with Rachel about what she saw is what prompts her to leave.
Unfortunately, George allows his pettiness and spite to take over. He scrambles eggs with lobster and serves it to Rachel, knowing she is kosher and has never had lobster before. He even offers her a lobster bib to inform her of his deception.
14. When George Does… “The Opposite.”
In “The Opposite,” George decides that he is going to do the complete opposite of his instincts. He figures so far; following his instincts has gotten him nowhere.
Doing the opposite affords him immediate success. George tells a woman in the coffee house the truth that he is unemployed and lives with his parents, and strangely she's interested.
Simultaneously, Pendant Publishing is going out of business, while Kramer promotes his coffee table book. George interviews at Yankee Stadium and answers the questions bluntly.
It intrigues the interviewer who introduces him to George Steinbrenner, the baseball club's owner. When he tells Costanza it's a pleasure meeting him, George ignores common sense and tells him he wishes he could say the same before telling him off about bad player trades.
Surprisingly, Steinbrenner hires him on the spot, officially employing him with the New York Yankees. “The Opposite” is Jason Alexander is at his best.
15. When George Does a Boudoir Shoot “The Package.”
When Sheila (Heather Campbell) from the one-hour photo shop flirts with George, he excitedly snaps more pictures to develop. Afterward, he discovers a racy photo and mistakenly believes “Photo Store Sheila” included an image of herself.
When George decides to ask her out, Kramer interjects. He insists that he needs to make a grander gesture considering the lengths she went to entice George.
Kramer proposes a boudoir shoot complete with a velvet couch and fan. George concurs and then drops the photos off for Sheila to develop. When he picks them up, he discovers the other photo clerk has developed his images.
Furthermore, he included one of himself posing in the same fashion as George. It's “the timeless art of seduction.” Jason Alexander shines in this comical episode of Seinfeld.
16. When George Bargain Gifts “The Red Dot.”
In “The Red Dot,” Elaine gets George a job in her office. It's no secret that George Costanza is a cheapskate.
Unsurprisingly, he tries to pass off a discounted Cashmere sweater with a red dot as an extravagant Christmas gift. Elaine realizes it after Cosmo Kramer points it out.
She tricks him into confessing that he knew about the dot all along. Regardless, Elaine finds it insulting, and George regifts the sweater to the cleaning lady he's sleeping with at work.
She tells a dramatic story about dreaming of the day she would own a cashmere sweater before noticing the dot. Eventually, George is in his boss's office.
He knows that George had relations with the cleaning lady on the desk. George tries to plead ignorance, “Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I gotta plead ignorance on this one.”
Ultimately, he is fired but not before the boss hands him the sweater informing him that the cleaning lady wanted him to give it back on her behalf.
17. When George Pretends He Is “The Marine Biologist.”
In this season five comical gem, Jerry runs into an old high school classmate (Rosalind Allen) who asks about George. For some reason, he lies and tells her that George is a marine biologist.
After his initial glee about hearing her name and shock about Jerry's lie, he panics. First, he delivers one of his funniest lines, “Why couldn't you make me an architect? You know I always wanted to pretend that I was an architect.” It's so Costanza.
But she's interested in dating George, so he continues the rouse. It's going great until a crowd surrounding a beached whale interrupts their romantic barefoot walk.
Someone shouts out, “Is anyone a marine biologist?” So George is on the hook and saves the whale. Later, George recounts his heroic story at Monk's Cafe with the gang.
His theatrics and delivery of his whale of a tale are Jason Alexander at his funniest. Eventually, we learn that the “great beast” had an obstructed blow hole due to Kramer's using the ocean as his golf driving range. “What? Is that a Titleist? A hole in one, huh.”
18. When George Shares His ATM Pin “The Secret Code.”
“The Secret Code” is top-notch George Costanza. Susan Ross asks George for his bank ATM code, and he refuses, stating he should be able to have things of his own.
Meanwhile, Elaine invites Jerry, who invites George to dinner with J. Peterman. However, she cancels, but Peterman still wants to eat with the “bulls.” Jerry excuses himself with a comedy show lie, but Costanza isn't so lucky.
Poor Georgie is stuck listening to Peterman's mind-numbing stories. Then, when on their way to drop George off, Peterman receives a call and flips the car around. It's hilarious as Costanza's face smears across the window.
While George waits in Peterman's mother's room, he confesses his ATM code to her because she is dying. Peterman runs into the room as his mom shouts the code loudly, “Bosco! Bosco!”
He has no idea what that is and ponders its meaning. George offers no solution. Then, a fire breaks out, and a man is stuck in a bank ATM and needs a card to get his sleeve released.
J. Peterman demands that George give the man his card and eventually his code. John O'Hurley and Jason Alexander deliver side-splitting laughter.
19. When George's Worlds Collide “The Pool Guy.”
In “The Pool Guy,” George is concerned about Susan's new friendship with Elaine. He fears that his “two worlds will collide.” Kramer understands, but Elaine thinks George is being ridiculous.
Later, when George arrives at Monk's to meet Jerry, he finds him sitting in a booth with Susan, Elaine, and Kramer.
Thus proving his worlds are colliding. “You're killing independent George! A George divided against itself cannot stand.”
Next, the trio goes to a movie and leaves a note for George to meet them. However, Costanza ends up calling out for them in the wrong theatre. “This is not good. Worlds are colliding! George is getting upset!”
Then, he realizes he has nothing to worry about because Susan finds the amount of talking they do annoying. Therefore, she has no desire to become part of the group.
20. When George Finds Out About Toxic Glue “The Wedding Invitations.”
In one of Seinfeld's most memorable episodes, George and Susan pick out wedding invitations. Because of his frugality, George is content with the cheapest ones.
Notably, the woman helping them informs them that the glue isn't adhesive and requires excess moisture to stick. George is panicking and wants out of the wedding but believes it's gone too far to break it off now.
So he bounces ideas off of Jerry and tries to get her to call it off by taking up smoking. When that doesn't work, he asks for a prenup, hoping it will offend her enough to stop the wedding.
Nonetheless, she laughs in his face, pointing out that she makes more money than him. Eventually, we see Susan licking the envelopes before dropping dead.
When George gets the news, he responds with a shrug and apathetic, “huh.” The doctor explains the envelope glue likely caused Susan's death, and George is out of the wedding in an unconventional way. As Kramer would say, “Poor, Lily.”
Finally, George calls Marisa Tomei to inform her that he isn't engaged, elaborating he has the funeral tomorrow but could get together on the weekend. She hangs up as we cringe and laugh through George's nonchalance about Susan's demise.
21. When George Photoshops His Boss's Picture “The Slicer.”
After George loses his job with the New York Yankees, he interviews at Kruger Industrial Smoothing. Mr. Kruger (Daniel von Bargen) takes a chance on him.
As George leaves the office, he notices a picture of him that triggers a memory of the “Boombox Incident.” George recounts going for a swim, and when he comes back, his belongings are gone. “Clothes, towel, umbrella, all gone!”
He begins screaming at the kids of a nearby family before losing it and chucking their boombox into the ocean. After realizing the tide took his stuff out, he gives Kruger a fake address and gets out of there.
George panics and doesn't want to lose the job because he doesn't have to do much. It's the dream! So he steals the picture and takes it to get himself photoshopped out. However, George returns to discover they took Kruger out of the image.
The employee mistook him due to George's massive loss of hair. So the employee attempts to recreate Mr. Kruger from memory for an animated disaster.
Eventually, Jerry convinces his lousy date, “Pimple Popper M.D.,” to do a skin cancer screening at Kruger Industrial Smoothing. That way, George can get a picture of Kruger without his shirt on to photoshop him back in.
Ultimately, Kruger has a suspicious mole, and George needs to inform him. However, Kruger admits his mole looks as it did ten years ago in the photo. He does not know that George has recently replaced it.
Finally, Kruger admits he and his kids threw “a pear-shaped loser's” stuff into the ocean the day of the photo, and George loses it. It's one of the funniest episodes of Seinfeld.
22. When George Creates a Nap Station at Work “The Nap.”
Under his desk, George has found the perfect place to take a mid-day nap at work. Jerry is remodeling his kitchen, and George hires his contractor to modify his desk.
It comes with a cup holder, hidden compartments for a blanket, and a shelf for his alarm clock. One day, Steinbrenner waits in his office to ask George the lyrics to Pat Benatar's “Heartbreaker.”
However, George is under his desk and can't get out without alerting him. So three hours later, George quietly calls Jerry and begs him to call in a bomb threat.
Unfortunately, Steinbrenner's grandkids visit and find George under his desk after being instructed to climb under it because of the bomb threat.
It prompts Steinbrenner to believe George has ESP and puts George in charge of the terrorist's (Jerry's) demand for a fitted hat day. Eventually, Mr. Steinbrenner hears George's ticking alarm clock and believes a bomb is inside his desk and has it destroyed.
23. When George Has a Man Crush on Tony “The Stall.”
Elaine Benes is dating “Pretty Boy Tony” (Dan Cortese), who enamors George with his “coolness.” While Jerry thinks he's a “Mimbo,” a male bimbo, it's apparent George has a platonic crush on him.
He and Tony discuss getting together for rock climbing, and George excitedly reports he will make sandwiches. However, when Kramer walks in, Tony invites him to go with them, and George is disappointed that it will not be just the two of them.
Nevertheless, George makes sandwiches, and the three make their way up the cliff. Kramer swings freely while George anxiously clings to the rocks.
Finally, Tony designates them to tie his rope so he can climb up to where they are on the cliff. Unfortunately, George lets go of the rope to get a sandwich for Tony, and he suffers a nasty fall.
George is devastated and will do anything to get back in Tony's good graces, but Tony is not having it. After accepting George's comics, he instructs, “Step off, George! I don't want to see you!”
24. When George Loses His Gore-Tex “The Dinner Party.”
George is outraged about the social obligation of bringing wine and dessert to a dinner party. Additionally, he insists that people would appreciate Ring Dings and Pepsi more.
Nonetheless, the wine and chocolate babka win. Also, it's a freezing winter day, and George is thrilled to have a warm Gore-Tex parka to keep him warm. Next, Jerry and Elaine head to the bakery while Kramer and George go to the liquor store.
The owner doesn't have change for $100, and they go to the newspaper stand to break the bill. Then, after they buy the wine, George and Kramer want to wait inside due to the freezing temperatures.
However, the store owner will not allow it even though they are paying customers. Unfortunately, someone blocks their car by double parking, and the heat doesn't work.
Eventually, George's huge, puffy coat knocks over a display of wine, and he forfeits it to the liquor store owner to cover the expense. It's a perfect example of Seinfeld being a show about nothing and a fifth-season favorite.
