• Are you feeling that you have a lesser number of friends now?
• When you have a tea party, you need to think, whom I can invite?
• You have no one around with whom you can go for a long drive?
• Do you feel lonely and lost quite often?
• Do you find that your friends no longer need your company?

Then, certainly, your Social circle is shrinking!

So, folks, what defines your social circle? The definition of a Social Circle is a group of people who are socially connected. It may be a group of friends who hang out together. But your social contacts within your wider social circle may not necessarily know one another.

Once, an “apple of the eye” among your friends, you do have not many friends to fall back on. The situation is  disturbing and worrisome. This leads to mental and physical disturbances and you become lonely. To wade away boredom, you are glued to TV channels and even worse, to your mobile 24x 7. You find them to be the most trustworthy companions in your life. If this is age-related, then certain reasons justify the scenario, if not age-related then you need to reboot your social life.

This is a reality that the older we get, the less friends we seem to have. Well, the answer is likely to depend on how old you are. Teenagers and those in their early twenties are the most socially promiscuous. They make more friends and social contacts than the rest of us. But by their mid-twenties, this circle gets halved.

Hence, there is a need to improve your social life as it is equally important as your physical, mental, and economic life. There is no medication or prescription available which can help you improve your social life, but there are certain tips, which can help you in the long run:

How to improve your social life

• Prioritize your social life.
• Get out and explore your interests.
• Start more conversations.
• Become more approachable.
• Reconnect with old friends.
• Be authentic to turn acquaintances into friends.
• Find your tribe(s)
• Improve your social skills.

A new study conducted by scientists at Aalto University in Finland and the University of Oxford in England found that you begin losing friends in your early twenties.

The teams studied the overall activity of 3 million mobile phone users, considering frequency patterns, who they contacted, and when. Social media contact – including Facebook friends – did not count.

Researchers found that before the age of 25, both men and Women tend to be socially promiscuous, building friendships and creating contacts. After 25 though, the number of “friends” declines steadily until it plateaus at retirement age.

Interestingly, the researchers found the loss of friends happens more rapidly for women than men. A 25-year-old female contacts an average of 17.5 people per month, while a 25-year-old male contacts an average of 19.

This way we see that the above study reveals that as a person moves on to a new age bracket, friendship pattern evolves. As a child, you have lots of friends like colony friends, school friends, bus friends so on and so forth. As a teenager, you find that your childhood friends have disappeared. They have moved on to different schools and different places. As you grow further, with the pressure of studies looming large, you remain confined to your homes/ hostels and you hardly socialize. As an adult when you join the workforce, you make colleagues as your friends and former friends take a back seat.

“Friendships become more about quality over quantity, often prioritizing support over entertainment.”

Some findings even suggest that women begin to nurture relationships that are more meaningful to them, such as with a potential life partner or a best friend.

“By their mid-twenties, women in particular begin to focus their resources selectively on career, family or both, and as a natural part of that process, friendships generally align with those priorities,” says Jessica Dube, an advanced practice nurse at Advocate Dreyer Psychiatry.

Around the age of 40, though, a man’s social circle begins to shrink more quickly than his female counterpart. At this age, men contact an average of 12 people per month, while women contact an average of 15.

The Social Circle of women shrinks further as women want to be friends or remain socially connected with people who are invested in their children, such as mothers, sisters, mothers-in-law, and close friends. From an evolutionary perspective, having a network at this age was believed to help women raise their children. Men, on the other hand, tend to be more focused on their status and professional life after they have a family.

These are a few of the natural reasons for shrinking social life but there are few environmental or external reasons also. We need to consider that. As a first observation, the evolution of technology has brought loneliness to human beings. Technology provides answers for all – peers, friends, spouses, colleagues, etc. etc.

That is why people across generations are hooked to their mobiles. They do not want to talk to anyone, they do not want to meet anyone, and they just want to be with their mobiles, tabs, or TV screens. They become passive listeners where there is no one to counter them, argue with them, or say any such thing that is unpleasant to their ears. A person feels that they do not need any friends around them as they do not want to cope with their demands or tantrums.

According to a study conducted by scientists from Aalto University in Finland and the University of Oxford in England, it has been observed that your social circle starts to shrink soon after you turn 25. Based on their data analysis of 3 million mobile phone users, starting from our mid-twenties, we start losing social contacts rapidly, with women losing them at a faster rate than men. So, if you are a chronic mobile user, you are at risk of losing your friends.

Your social circle has not started shrinking, it has shrunk already!

So, chuck your mobile, meet your friends, and be HappyHO.