As a runner I have one big issue: I don't like any people in front of me. And that's very unfortunate, considering my pace.

Elderly lady on crutches

Whenever I see someone further up the street or path, I get this urgent feeling I have to pass them. Last Saturday I was running, when I spotted an elderly lady on crutches.

'I can pass that!' I thought triumphantly.

So I started to make a run for it. But it was only after what seemed an interminable distance I could pass her by. And once you pass someone, you can't immediately stop running.

You can't just stop

You have to look as if you're just breezing by, no effort at all. Because otherwise you look like one of those runners who can't stand to have anyone in front of them.

So I ran a respectful distance, and then collapsed on the ground.

But at least I passed her!

Even though  I almost passed out from the effort it took me.