Many of us know a toddler or child who is a picky or fussy eater; whether it’s our child, our friend’s child, our child’s friend, a child we see at the local cafe or birthday party… Stats[1] show that up to 50% of Children may be described as picky eaters during childhood and problematic feeding is frequently associated with high levels of parental distress and mealtime conflict.  So, how do we tackle it and ensure our children are eating well, growing and having the healthy and nutritious meals they need?

Meet mum of 2, Sarah Almond Bushell from Eastbourne, aka ‘The Children’s Nutritionist’ (www.childrensnutrition.co.uk), who is hoping to help make Mealtimes happier times for all. The award-winning Registered Dietitian, who has with over 20 years of NHS and private practice experience, shares with us her thoughts and tips on how to tackle picky and fussy eating…

Sarah’s 12 Top Tips to Help Navigate Fussy Eating

1. Trying a Variety of Foods – Recent data from my The Children’s Nutritionist’s survey (of 144 parents) found that 95% of stressed parents said that if they could wave a magic wand, they would use it to have their child eat a wider variety of foods. Its all about exposure, perseverance and ensuring a positive mealtime vibe. Exposure includes offering a wide variety of different foods at mealtimes and not being afraid to present something new. Children need to see parents eating these foods, enjoying them and surviving, to know that they are safe and enjoyable. Exposure also needs to happen outside of the mealtime too like shopping for food, growing it in the garden, helping prepare meals.  Perseverance is just that. We know from the research that children need to try a food 10 times before they learn to like it, but actually for bitter foods (like veggies) it can be many more than that. We also know from the research that parents overestimate these exposures, giving up after 5-6 attempts although they firmly believe they’ve done 10.
2. Introduce a learning plate – Children learn to eat through their sensory systems and so having a side plate where a thumbnail sized portion of new food is placed can be a helpful way for anxious children to become familiar with food. Food that goes on the learning plate can be poked, prodded, sniffed, squished, licked, chewed and spat out. There is no expectation to eat, it’s just for exploration and gaining familiarity.
3. Make food taste nice. Linked to that is making sure foods are actually tasty, steamed broccoli might be the healthiest option, but sautéed broccoli with garlic, butter or soy sauce is far tastier and stands a greater chance of being eaten. Afterall food isn’t nutrition until its chewed and swallowed.
4. Set the mealtime vibe. The atmosphere at mealtimes  plays a huge role. It’s our job as parents to make mealtimes, fun, happy sociable time. There should be no expectation for a child’s eating performance. Keep it light-hearted, play gentle music, make conversation the focus, not the food. We want our children to look forward to mealtimes and actually want to come to the table, not dread it.
5. Parents should decide what’s on the menu, rather than asking ‘what would you like for tea’ as young children have terrible nutritional knowledge! But it’s great to offer them a small choice such as; ‘would you like an apple or a pear with your sandwich’, as this allows for autonomy.
6. Know Your Role – A parent’s job is to provide healthy, nutritious and tasty food, to decide where those meals and snacks will take place, to make the atmosphere happy and relaxed and to set the schedule. And that’s it, job done.
7. Let your child do their job. A child’s role is to come to the table and decide if to eat. In what order and importantly, when they are finished. Trust children to choose the order they eat their food in and crucially let them stop when they say they’re full. Children have great self-regulation when we don’t override it. It’s not the job of the parent to get the child to eat and when you stick to your role and let your child stick to theirs, you’ll remove the stress that many of us feel at mealtimes as it immediately takes the pressure off.
8. Get rid of old phrases – I am passionate about helping to cut the ties of generational eating habits, having seen that often the children’s behaviour is fuelled by our own ingrained unconscious beliefs and habits from our childhoods around what mealtimes should look like. Sayings like – ‘if you don’t clear your plate there’ll be no pudding’ and ‘if you don’t eat your tea you’ll be having it for breakfast’ and ‘we’re not leaving the table until you’ve eaten that broccoli’ are all stress evoking, creating dangerous negative emotions around food.
9. Don’t restrict fun foods like chocolate or ice cream, this only serves to make them more desirable and young children won’t be able to help themselves, they’ll overindulge whenever the occasion arises. We’ve all seen that child at the birthday party gorging on the chocolate fingers! Instead make them part of your routine.
10. Change up the cues. If you have a child who eats well at nursery but not at home it may well be that the cues that lead up to mealtimes at home are set to not-eating. This is very common when children have been pressured to eat something they didn’t want to or reminded to eat when they were finished and its so simple to change. Swap seats at the dinner table, tie your hair back if you always have it down, wear an apron, get new placemats. Parents just need to switch up the pre-meal cues.
11. Make sure their position at the table is right – positioning is one of the main reasons children don’t eat well and its all to do with their feeling of stability and safety.  Ideally they need to have a 90 degree angle (right angle) at their hips, knees and ankles. And they must have a foot rest. This is because the human body’s number 1 priority is to sustain life and so it’s going to put all its focus into keeping your child upright, protecting their head which means it’s not allowing them to focus on the job in hand, eating. A supportive chair will allow them to free up their focus to concentrate on eating and drinking. If your child fidgets or squirms in their chair, just check their seating. This could be the reason they won’t eat well.
12. Have realistic timings – although we love the social aspect of gathering round the table for a delicious meal, eating for young children is functional, and sitting around with the grown ups is boring. Developmentally children only see mealtimes as an opportunity to get their fill and move on to something more interesting like playing with their toys. So, don’t insist they stay at the table if it looks like their done. Here’s my guide of how long you should expect your child to be able to sit at the table for:

• 12 months 20 minutes
• 18 months – 5 years 10-15 minutes
• 5 years -11 years 20 minutes
• 12 years + 30 minutes or longer

During Fussy Eating Awareness Week, Sarah shares a range of tools and techniques she uses, which are scientifically proven to support the development of more positive Food habits for fussy eaters and their families, with easy step by step activities and advice. To get involved parents can register online: https://childrensnutrition.co.uk/fussy-eating-awareness-week/. Access to Sarah’s expertise will be FREE but as an extension of her impact, Sarah is hoping to make a difference and is asking that people who join her make a voluntary donation to The Trussell Trust who support a nationwide network of food banks, providing emergency food and support to people locked in poverty.

[1] (de Barse et al., 2016; Harris et al., 2018; Jarman et al., 2015; Trofholz et al., 2017).