Research shows teaching Calm down strategies for preschoolers is one of the most important things you can do for their social and emotional development.

Not only do coping skills help them through big feelings, but they also empower little ones with a sense of self-control and confidence as problem-solvers.

Teaching your preschooler developmentally-appropriate calming techniques takes patience, buy-in, and time on both parts. But with these three things in place, you will be able to support your child in learning to regulate their emotions.

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What are calm down strategies for preschoolers?

A calm down strategy is a coping skill that helps children to regulate their emotions.

Calming strategies may require the use of an object (e.g., sensory tool), physical activity (e.g., deep breathing), or a shift in thinking (e.g., mindfulness technique).

When should I teach calm down strategies to my child?

Children rely on the co-regulation of their emotions with the direct support of a caregiver as infants and toddlers. However, it is never too early to model healthy ways to cope with feelings.

By preschool age, most children are ready to begin taking some ownership over calm down strategies. Please note that young children will still need lots of adult support in learning new coping skills, figuring out when to use them, and identifying what works best.

Many parents and educators who use a positive approach to discipline will introduce calming strategies in the context of a designated calming space (e.g., “calm down corner“) or calm down kit.

How do I teach my preschooler to calm down?

How we introduce calming strategies to our preschoolers significantly impacts their success in using them. As a former professional school counselor and certified positive discipline parent educator, I encourage you to:

1. Teach calming strategies first when kids are calm.
2. Frame calming strategies as an opportunity, not a punishment.
3. Offer calming strategies as a choice, rather than a demand.
4. Provide visual cues of calming strategies.
5. Create a timeout alternative with your child, such as a designated calming space or calm down kit.
6. Remember that calming strategies are not a substitute for caregiver love and support!

How do you calm a hyper preschooler?

Calm down strategies can help preschoolers through big emotions, including:

• Anger
• Frustration
• Sadness
• Worry/Anxiety
• Fear
• Disappointment

At the same time, we must hold realistic expectations when we’re talking about young children and their emotions.

The brain’s prefrontal cortex helps us decipher “right” from “wrong,” think rationally, and regulate our emotions and does not fully develop until around age 25. And even then, many adults still struggle in these areas!

Furthermore, some children naturally have more energy and as a result, a more challenging time self-regulating.

As caregivers, we can provide ample positive outlets for this energy (e.g., lots of free play and time outdoors) and intervene early with calming strategies when we see big emotions bubbling up.

Tip: Focus on what is in your control

*If you are new to positive discipline, I realize this can sound shocking! Positive (authoritative) parenting is neither authoritarian nor permissive. It does not condone using fear or rewards to coerce/control children’s behavior. At the same time, positive parents uphold limits and boundaries and allow natural consequences to unfold.

**If you are interested in learning more about positive parenting tools that support healthy social and emotional development, I invite you to take my free 30-day challenge.

What are effective calm down strategies?

Before we dive into my top 11 calming strategies for preschoolers, here are the most important factors that influence how effective a coping skill will be.

Calm down strategies for preschoolers should:

1. Be developmentally appropriate
2. Match the child’s unique interests
3. Match the child’s skills and abilities
4. Require minimal to no setup time
5. Be easily transportable (moving to a new location often has a calming effect)
6. Be safe (use good judgment and avoid heavy/hard objects if your preschooler struggles with aggressive behavior when angry or upset)

Where can I find a visual calm down strategies PDF?

Visuals are essential for empowering preschoolers to remember and take ownership of their calming strategies!

Here are a few of my favorite visual tools for young children. Each set of visual calming strategies comes in a PDF format so you can quickly print and begin using them with your child or students!

11 Realistic Calm Down Strategies to Teach Your Preschooler

#1: Hug it Out

Never underestimate the power of a good hug. Science says so!

We can start by offering hugs as a calming choice. As they grow, we can empower kids to self-advocate and ask for hugs when they need them.

However, not every dysregulated child will respond positively to hugs or physical touch. Always use your discretion, ask first, and choose strategies that work well for your child.

If your child is not a hugger, or you work in a professional setting where hugs are not an option, consider offering a small comfort item instead.

I love these weighted, therapeutic stuffed animals as an alternative to caregiver hugs:

#2: Take a walk

If there’s one (and only one) good thing I will say about traditional, punitive timeouts is the location change. Helping your child step away from the circumstance that triggered their big feelings is essential.

Going for a walk is an excellent calming strategy for high-energy kids who like to be in control or are always on the go.

If you’re taking a walk outside together to cool off, allow your child to choose the route.

When kids experience big emotions they feel out of control. By slowly regaining control in a new setting, they will begin to calm down.

#3: Deep breathing

In my personal and professional experience, telling a young child to take deep breaths rarely works! Instead, we need to show them how.

Blowing bubbles, deep breathing into a pinwheel, or inhaling/exhaling in tandem with a breathing ball visually reinforces deep breaths for preschoolers.

Trust me, introducing fun toys is so much more effective than telling kids what to do!

#4: Play a game

Remember, we are talking about preschoolers here. Most coping skills will still require your support, and in many cases, active participation.

Games are an excellent opportunity to first connect, then correct under positive discipline.

Let’s face it: Lecturing an upset child does not work.

By temporarily shifting gears, we can help preschoolers to calm their bodies and minds, putting them in an optimal place for collaborative problem-solving.

Here are a few of my favorite games that function as calm down strategies for preschoolers.

You can also find a complete list of over 30 of our favorite family games below:

#5: Build something

Creative play is a proven way to calm the body and mind.

And if you’re facing parenting stress, I urge you to join in on the fun! Building with toys such as Legos or blocks can have a calming effect for us as adults too!

Any blocks or building sets your child loves will work great! Here are a few of my preschool favorites:

#6: Use a sensory tool

Sensory toys are a great way to help preschoolers release energy and cope with big emotions.

Many children, particularly those with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), or Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), may engage in challenging behavior as a way to gain or avoid stimuli.

Sensory processing tools help kids fulfill their sensory needs and healthily regulate emotions.

As a former school counselor, I have so many favorite sensory tools that have helped my students persevere through challenging moments: