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And just like that, it is gone!

Auto-recovery is an urban legend.

Well, at least for me today it is. Having finished a page and a half of my latest blog post, I pissed off my laptop somehow and Word closed.

Historically, when I re-open Word, there is a list of auto-recovery documents on the left side of the screen. From there, I can re-open doc2 or doc8 and then save it to prevent future problems.

Well, that did not happen this morning.

I cannot find it anywhere. I even got out the “Microsoft® Office 2016 All-In-One for Dummies” to help research where my blog post ended up. Having checked every box, it is becoming clear I cannot find the post. It may still be in the bowels of my computer, but I have neither the time nor patience to continue the search.

I will write more about what I was writing about tomorrow.

Right now, I am upset with myself for assuming everything would be ok and that I had taken enough precautions so that I wouldn’t lose my work. Going forward, I have gone into Word, Options, and changed the auto-save time to 5 minutes instead of 10. But this isn’t going to bring back the almost two pages I had written.

A year ago, as I approached the abyss living life with concealed Depression, I thought I had all the pieces in place and protections arranged. After all, I was exercising five times and week and reading a lot. Boy was I wrong. I had no idea how low, low could be. And the resulting “hitting of the wall,” was a wake-up call I will always remember.

Now at the time of my reaching the depths of the abyss, depression did not let me see any path forward.

READ MORE: Up against the wall

All I saw was the wall. Solid, immovable, impenetrable, imposing, and to my weary eyes, permanent. Then, as I was introduced to tools for recovery, I slowly began to see that there was a way forward. Realizing, and finally facing depression, I found myself beginning to put the pieces in place that would be my new life with depression.

My goal now is to lead a balanced life.

And when I lose 45 minutes’ worth of work that I cannot replace, I could be angry. I could blame technology or my laptop, or the dog coming and going that may have distracted me. But I know it was something I did, and I accept the responsibility for it. And right now, there is no way I see to retrieve it. So, I cannot change what has happened.

But I can and will change my attitude towards the loss of my work.

I already have taken steps to prevent this from occurring in the future. And I will create a title for each new blog post at the time I begin Writing, so the odds of me being able to retrieve the work will be increased. The future will be filled with the unexpected. I will be ready to decide how I will respond and feel about it.

READ MORE: Is this a new trigger signaling a relapse or am I just messy?

Covid19 or Corona Virus is an example of the unexpected.

The blog post that I lost was my examination of my depression against the onset of the Virus. I had begun to draw parallels linking my personal journey with the journey we are all on now.

After I finish adjusting my attitude towards losing my work, I will focus on this issue again.

Tune in next time and I see if I can remember what I was writing.

My Concealed Depression is written under the alias “Depression is not my boss.” I have certifications in SMART Recovery and am a Global Career Development Facilitator.

Last year, I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder.

The post And just like that, it is gone! appeared first on My Concealed Depression.

This post first appeared on Depression Is Not My Boss, please read the originial post: here

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And just like that, it is gone!


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