Pretty Hurts. Beauty hurts. Whatever version of the expression you use, nothing proves it truer than historical Fashion trends.

We know Women used to lace themselves into corsets so tight that it literally moved their internal organs. But what about other weird fashion trends?

Did men get in on the torture? Not as much as women, but you can learn about some crazy fashion below.

1. Lotus Shoes

Do you know what’s sexy? Girls with no toes . . . or so thought the Chinese centuries ago. Ever heard of a little tradition called “foot binding”?

It would be considered child torture today. But back then, it was par for the course. Parents would break little girls toes and feet to make sure they didn’t grow too big.

Ideally, their toes would wither and fall off. Cute, right? Then they could wear lotus shoes – which are a true pointy toe (but without the discomfort because hey, you don’t have toes anymore).

It took China until 1912 to outlaw this tradition. What the heck!!

2. Codpieces

We teased you with it in the title, so we’ll tell you what it means/is. Have you ever heard of the mooseknuckle? It’s a term that matches the female “cameltoe”.

It’s not fashionable or really acceptable to have one now, but back in the 1400s, men were buttoning on fake, fabric covered penis shapes to look cool. Yes, you read that right.

A codpiece is a detachable penis bulge worn outside the clothes. They supposedly said that you were a man of high stature. To us all they say is . . . what were they thinking?!

3. Breast Flatteners

Women really can’t get a break. If you weren’t born as a woman in China having her feet broken then you could have been born in the ’20s. Where having breasts (usually smiled at with women) was now out of style.

Still had breasts? Too bad – you should work on flattening those out. So the breast flattener was invented. Thankfully it was more of a constricting bra than a torture machine – but that doesn’t mean it was comfortable.

It was like wearing a corset but on your breasts. According to the inventors, you would slip the bra on over your head and then pull the side straps tight, to force breasts down against the body.

4. Black Teeth

What a world we live in. Back in Queen Elizabeth the 1st’s time, sugar was a commodity not all people could get. And dental hygiene hadn’t started to make the rounds either.

When sugar became available, only the rich could afford it and the Queen, in particular, went overboard.

So much so that her sugar addiction plus years of dental neglect turned her teeth black. Instead of this causing ridicule, it caused some high-born and rich women to color their teeth black too.

They wanted to look like they could afford so much sugar that they had decaying teeth as well. How very. . . royal.

5. The Hobble Skirt

Again, poor, poor women of history. If it wasn’t the foot thing or the breast thing, it was hobble skirts. A skirt that was literally designed to keep women slow and dependent on their husbands or chaperones.

One advertisement calls it “the speed limit skirt for women”. Charming, yes? The skirt ankle length, but has a belt-like feature around the ankles. It makes an interesting silhouette, which hopefully is the only reason women put up with it.

The skirt gets its name from a farm term “hobbling” which is where they tie animals feet together so they can’t run off. If you were a woman in the late 1800s, you could be treated like an animal too!

6. Chopines

A lot of people think of the French when they think of the birth of high heels. But the true birth of heeled shoes goes back to the nasty flooded streets of 16 century Venice.

Remember that back then, there weren’t sewers, so people would dump their waste on the street below. And with their infrastructure in the primitive state it was back then, the famous Venetian canals would often overflow onto the walkways/

Now you have a sidewalk flooded with water and human waste. Not ideal, right? Especially not if you’re in the long skirts of the time. So – the Venetians invented Chopines, which are basically really tall platform shoes.

These weren’t some modern-day looking heels. We’re talking about a normal looking shoe on a column of about six inches or more. The higher the shoe, the richer you were.

Some ladies had shoes so high they needed a companion to keep them stable.

Now they could wade through the muck without getting their pants or skirts dirty. They also could have cleaned up the streets – but fashion over function, we guess.

7. Stiff Collars

If you get your shirts heavily starched at the dry cleaners, it’s nothing compared to this old, male trend. In the 1800s men would wear detachable collars starched so strong, they could choke a grown man.

And the circumference of the collars wasn’t the only issue. The edges were folded so sharply that they could jab you in the throat as well. Sounds mildly annoying until you realize that sharp edge is right over a jugular vein.

For all the terrible painful fashion on this list, men should be thankful that the biggest male fashion trend right now is patterned socks. Youth baseball socks aren’t going to kill anyone!

Weird Fashion Trends

After reading this list, those clear jeans that were making a splash on the internet last year don’t sound so bad. We’d rather our legs be sweating than someone repeatedly breaking our toes.

What did you think of this weird fashion trend list? Which one was the worst to you?

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