https://gameoftomes.org/a/mrbigtanderson-person

There is no shame in losing to the best of a Competition. Even though one tried their best it should be still a feeling a pride that if they had done everything and still not gotten it. That is what was once told when I was younger. Part of me believes it and part of me doesn’t because it hurts as everyone knows to put everything in your efforts and still have to be that much short of the goal, of the prize no matter how big or small it may be. In a competition that is all about base numbers and getting them high as possible there is something to when an amateur can stack with the pros. Looks good to see you can hang with people who may have made this their profession or who made it their main hobby because you may not have the time or the health or the energy but still you are there and doing everything to stand amongst them. This competition has something left for me to get because I have been the top writer in two separate events. Out of everyone I have been the one guy to beat and pushed myself to pain whether I like it or not and as much as those two times make me smile because some small part of me looks at all the people trying for everything and still feels like the outsider. No worries, while our work shows that we belong.

What had been the most painful has been the two times where I had been close, so close at doing it with all the books written the plots hammered out and the words counted only to find that unfortunately, my spot was one short of the goal. Jafar makes a good song about only being second best, but it stings when that is the case. It hurts, it burns and there is enough pain in my life that this time there is less a plan and just will. There needs to be a third victory, even if it never mattered and even if my fingers go numb and my body breaks again, fine. It will be done. Who knows, it may be that this will be second best again.

As Alexander Anderson said once, though” I would like a stab at it.”

Part of it will have to be new to get to the number that is in my crosshairs, but this time we are going to do, we are going to put on the joker makeup and act like a dog chasing an ambulance and see what happens when we get to it, if we do. Sometimes it has to be something that we put all our chips in and find the next level we have in something and let all we have be on the wayside. There is something to be said reaching that point for a goal no matter how inconsequential in the long run, and finding that right now would be nice.

Stay Strong.