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Some comments say it all.

After a recent STEPS Proactive Parenting seminar, one parent had this to say about the session:

Sometimes we need to be reminded that others are experiencing similar life problems, and that it’s ok to talk about them, acknowledge them, and seek help – there really is help and hope.

As parents, focusing on a few key things can make a big difference, especially as we work to protect our kids against addiction. Things like: increasing awareness, connecting to others, and getting educated on steps we can take to help our kids deal with life better.

Becoming the Best Parent You Can Be

Some STEPS Journey Blog articles are sort of a casual read, but this is not one of them. Hang in there, because it will be worth it.

This article will take a little thinking and extra reading on your part. In return, it will help you build a proactive parenting plan for your kids. One that will improve their lives and protect them against addiction. And getting started on that plan will take you only a few minutes.

The plan will be built by assessing 10 behaviors—each with a negative and positive version—your child may be developing as they navigate their way through life.  The 10 negative behaviors are dangerous because they can become “on ramps” for addiction or other issues. The positive versions work the other way and help your kid increase their resilience and personal well-being.

Which means they will also be more protected from addiction.

To get acquainted with these behaviors and learn from some of the common mistakes many parents have made (including me), pause now to read the article “10 Mistakes Parents Make.” This material will help you raise your kids to be more prepared to deal with the issues of entitlement, worry, pride, unawareness, resentment, isolation, impulsivity, stress, insecurity, and depression.

To be the best parent you can be, you must first become the best person you can be. Then, you are in position to teach and model the right behaviors for your kids. To learn how you can personally improve in each of the 10 areas above, read “A Vaccine for Addiction: Re-learning How to Live.”

Assessing How Your Kid is Developing

Now, it’s time to assess how your kid is doing with those same 10 behaviors.

The goal is not perfection, because we all have areas where we are “less than perfect.” You are simply trying to help guide your son or daughter to develop a healthy foundation so they can deal with the ups and downs of life effectively, which will also help protect them against addiction.

Think carefully about each of these 10 areas. Most of the time, do they choose to be:

1. Focused on Entitlement or Thankfulness?
2. Mired in Worry or content in Enjoyment?
3. Driven by foolish Pride or acting in Humility?
4. Known by Unawareness or Self-awareness?
5. Oriented toward Resentment or Acceptance?
6. Reacting to problems with Isolation or Connection?
7. Making choices with Impulsivity or Thoughtfulness?
8. Stricken with Stress or coping with Resilience?
9. Acting out of Insecurity or Self-esteem?
10. Mired in Depression or lifted by Joy?

Begin to think about what you can do (or stop doing) as a parent that might help your kids make positive adjustments in each of these areas.

Building a Proactive Parenting Plan

You are almost ready to capture your proactive parenting plan. Focus on the top few behaviors where you feel your kid’s well-being is most at risk and where they might want to improve. With those specific areas in mind, read  “How to Help Protect Your Kids Against Addiction.”

Now, write down you plan. What adjustments should you make in your parenting approach? What should you stop doing? What new things will you try? Discuss your proactive parenting plan with your spouse and commit to work together to become the best parents you can be.

You have taken some important steps to help your kid lead a happier life and protect them against addiction. Congratulations, because that’s what proactive parenting is all about.

Question: Are you committed to becoming the very best parent you can be?

Action: Look at your proactive parenting plan monthly to see how you are doing.

The post TEST DRAFT: Building a Proactive Parenting Plan appeared first on Steps Ministries: Hope, Healing, and Help.