Most of us can empathize with the daunting task of living with a relative afflicted by Alzheimer’s. But very few truly comprehend what it involves and how it feels.

There’s no one better than an actual Caregiver to tell us about it, as in the book “Finding Life in the Land of Alzheimer’s: One Daughter’s Hopeful Story.”

Far from adopting a gloomy outlook, Lauren Kessler offers us an uplifting and heartfelt narrative that shares a compassionate light on dementia.

Indeed, caring for a relative with Alzheimer’s is a herculean undertaking that many children and grandchildren don’t choose voluntarily. The Disease does not come knocking at the door but barges into our lives uninvited and without concession.

That’s why it’s paramount to safeguard our mental health while in this endeavor.

Sacrifices for the greater good

Alzheimer’s is like an uninvited intruder that completely changes family dynamics.

One could say that the Alzheimer’s patient is the sufferer. However, the entire nuclear family takes the hit as well. Supporting loved ones with this debilitating disease entails three types of sacrifice:

• An emotional sacrifice: Certainly, watching your father, mother, uncle, or grandparent succumb to the clutches of Alzheimer’s disease is a heart-wrenching ordeal. Seeing their functions deteriorate is frustrating, much more so if you can’t communicate. At some point, you may suppress your emotions, and your role becomes only that of a caregiver.
• A physical sacrifice: Caregivers also have a physical burden, especially in the advanced stages of the disease. Moving patients, transporting them, enduring sleepless nights, and coping with ceaseless stress can affect your health.
• A financial sacrifice: Alzheimer’s is also a financial quagmire. In addition to medications and doctor’s appointments, caregivers sometimes have to sacrifice their formal work. Often it is, in itself, a full-time job.

But does it have to be this way?

Efficient organization among relatives and Caregivers reduces the burden considerably. Granted, not everyone may feel the same depth of compassion. But it is also true that every caregiver deserves respite, regardless of their devotion and love for their relative.

The cry for help

The rigors of living with Alzheimer’s disease can have a profound impact.

A study published in the Clinical Gerontologist Journal followed 226 Alzheimer’s patients and their families for five years. At the end of the study, 60% of the caregivers showed symptoms of depression.

These symptoms worsened over the years. And once depressed, less than 10% of the caregivers improved their symptoms. That is why you should seek assistance before the weight of the burden spreads to other family members.

There are ten telltale symptoms of caregiver stress:

• Denial, as they most likely assume that the illness is not that serious.
• Anger, sometimes directed toward other family members, the caregiver himself, and even the person with dementia.
• Social isolation, as they no longer enjoy the activities they used to love.
• Anxiety about everyday situations, and that which could happen in the future.
• Sadness, which often manifests as indifference or lack of energy.
• Insomnia, as even sleep becomes stressful and nightmares may occur.
• Irritability, with emotional reactions becoming much more exaggerated.
• Lack of concentration, especially on complex tasks, and problem-solving difficulties.
• Health problems, such as getting sick more often or developing more serious, chronic ailments.

If you experience these symptoms, start taking action to mitigate stress.

Take a realistic view of the disease. Evaluate what you can do and know your limitations. If you have conflicting feelings, the first step is to accept them. Then, talk about them with someone you feel comfortable with.

Seek out a support group or health professional and be sure to ask for help. There are many online resources, support groups, and places to go for help. Take your time, and explore your available options with a healthcare expert. Remember that help is always within reach.