One thing about going to a really effective and powerful therapist, is that they teach you to look at your wounds and scars from your own viewpoint.
"How did that make YOU feel?"
None of us needs to take on victimization
that isn't our own.
We can just Heal from our own.
That alone is a great deal of
hard and worthy work.
Bucky Beaver
When I was a kid My two front teeth protruded I had buck teeth. I did not get orthodontic treatment until my early 30's. I spent too many years being called "Bucky Beaver". In the 1980's and 1990's, the character named Bucky Beaver could be seen often on television.
I always knew that once I saw that damned beaver on television, it was going to be a rough day the next school day. Keep in mind that we only had a handful of channels if your family did not have cable. It only took a few kids to get the avalanche of teasing and bullying going.
But this was not a type of "phobia" that had anything to do with beavers. No beaver was harmed while I was being bullied. I was the teenager trying to embrace her body. The beaver community has their own issues and they are not thinking about me.
To be certain, if there are government monies set aside for the protection of beavers, no one will accept this experience as proof that I should be entitled to part of those funds.
"Lady. You ain't no beaver. Go away."
And to date, no one has suggested that I become an activist for beavers or animals because I was called "Bucky Beaver."
BUT, when Women deal with misogyny they are often told that what they are experiencing is a type of phobia that also impacts males?
Further, that woman should now not only fight for herself but for males to have easier access to her when she is nude or otherwise vulnerable and speak on behalf of all women.
Unfortunately, many of us grew up being conditioned to ALWAYS consider others first. Even in our healing. It worked.
Thinking of ourselves for longer than 30 seconds now feels "strange" and "selfish". Some of us could be in the process of saving our own lives and we would not take it because we, female human beings, have been conditioned to believe that saving ourselves is not only a selfish act but one that harms others.
They got us good.
Males Do Not Collectively Advocate for Females
Women and girls are called every single non-human thing that you can think of.
In the minds of males, the worst thing males are called are things affiliated with women AND YET, few to none will admonish other males to advocate for other males because of this.
Males will not see female issues as a "collective issue" in need of advocacy just because they may have been told that they "run like a girl". (a compliment in my book by the way.)
Males do not see female issues as a "collective issue" in need of advocacy just because they are called a "bitch."
And yet because of the oppression of women and how we are conditioned, we will not only choose to advocate for males because they "suffer along with us" and bully other women and girls who still got good sense into doing it too.
Just for YOU
IF you want to save or change the world, consider this...none of us can do that until we heal ourselves. Remember, you cannot pour from an empty cup. By prioritizing your own healing, you not only tend to your well-being but also cultivate the resilience and capacity to support others genuinely. When you are insulted or harmed, consider how that harms you.
When you see another woman insulted or harmed, consider how that harms HER, as an individual. As a human being.
As you heal your wounds, you gain insights, develop coping mechanisms, and build an unyielding spirit that will empower you to uplift others with empathy and compassion. But only as you heal your own wounds.
By investing in yourself, you create a ripple effect that spreads love, healing, and hope throughout your world. So, take time to heal, delve into your inner depths, and nurture your own growth. Dedicate yourself to tune in to your internal voice.
For in doing so, you not only tend to your own needs but also prepare yourself to be a beacon of light for those around you
WE need our own healing and restoration. Healing, change, and restoration begin with ourselves.
None of us needs to take on victimization
that isn't our own.
We can just heal from our own.
That alone is a great deal of
hard and worthy work.
Unchain the Warrior Within: Empower Yourself as a Woman Who Fights for Herself
On the Grounds That We Are Human: Women and Girls Have a Human RIGHT to Dignity and Safety
Teasing, bullying, mocking, of women and girls:
Animals
"your feet look like duck feet"
"your nose looks like a snout"
"your neck looks like a giraffe."
"snaggletooth"
Goosey (a play on the then popular fashion brand Gucci. Guys used this to tease a particular girl they said had a long neck.)
Big Foot
"Bucky Beaver"
Name-calling/insults are not new for anyone. Consider these in song lyrics
"mouth almighty, tongue everlasting"
"Big mouth"/Whodini
"chicken head" /various artists
"slu....."/various artists
"skeezer"/various artists
"b...."/various artists
Sitcom Characters
Grady (Sanford and Son)
Aunt Esther (Sanford and Son)
Pam (Martin)
