I got some very nice moral support in a comment to my last post. I was replying and then realized I should make it another post rather than bury this all in a comment.

Hubby really has strong qualifications. We've talked to two headhunters who are really excited about him. I think that must be good for his self-esteem after being beaten up on his previous jobs. In a way I'm not sure he ever figured out how not to take it personally. It seems clear to me that most companies are abusive because it is cheaper to beat down the employees' self-esteem than it is to promote and pay them what they are worth.

But the headhunters, whose living is tied to whether their candidates get the job, are thrilled to find a good one. When he talks to them, they treat him like the pretty girl at the dance, for once. How nice to feel desirable.

It's his mid-life crisis attitude I have to worry about, whether he will stubbornly insist on tanking his best chances of geting hired just because he would rather "do nothing" à la his favorite movie Office Space.

Not to sound too flippant -- I know he has genuine feelings about pressure in the workplace to deal with. I just didn't think it should come at the expense of our financial security such as it was. Like anyone who was not born into wealth, we were not that secure to begin with. We didn't get our "starter" home (a joke phrase since we can't move up from here!) until our mid-30s, and started to save for retirement even later (only to see those accounts crash to almost zero after 9/11).

Because I don't have the qualifications right now to go out and find a job that would pay the bills, I don't think he has the luxury of dropping out to find his bliss. Certainly I never did.

Btw, as the "Chief Financial Officer" of my household, I already keep our modest lifestyle to a bare-bones budget, so in case anyone was wondering if there was a way to reduce those expenses (aside from moving out of Calif., in which case we'd never be able to afford to come back, and did I mention in a blog post that would break my heart?)