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Awesome Classified: 1986 Porsche 944 Turbo Will, Apparently, Change Your Life

If this car can do half the things the seller claims.. count me in! Race prepared 1986 Porsche 944 Turbo, 97,000 miles, $11,000. Hilarious CL ad below, this seller pulled out all the stops!

I see all kinds of classified ads for cars during my regular scouring of the web for the next fun car… this hilarious ad from Craigslist Minneapolis made me want to create a new blog category where I can post other such ridiculous ads. You’ve gotta hand it to the guy who put this one together… it’s all I can do not to run right out and buy this one… the part about the Argentinian intern is the best!

I’m not sure that a ‘Carrera’ (911) constitutes a ‘classless car’ but this guy thinks pretty highly of his 944… and himself, self described as ‘185 pounds of toned muscle’…

Here is a link to the ad itself. It’s also pasted below, verbatim, from the CL listing.. so when the ad is eventually taken down or the car is sold, we can still read it and laugh.

From Minneapolis Craigslist – July 29, 2015:

This is for the truly discerning man who understands that the right mix of class and power is to have an abundance of both. This pearl white chariot will take you to concerts, ball fields, and the apartment of that new intern from Argentina. Don’t get a classless Boxster or Carrera – get a real car meticulously assembled by the best mechanics in the world at the Zuffenhausen factory in 1986. Fewer than 11,000 of these cars were ever produced – she’s rarer than your Rolex. This car has been fully upgraded for track racing. Professionally balanced so that when she is 1/2 full of high octane and has 185 pounds of toned muscle in the driver’s seat the weight distribution is exactly 25% on each wheel. Her four 12″ Brembo discs stay cool with custom ventilation piping that 170 MPH breeze over their slotted surface. So, your buddy in the passenger seat just told you he’s decided to become a vegetarian – tap these suckers and break his stupid noise [nose] on the dashboard – cause hey, you’re doing the guy a favor.
And if during one of the many getaway chases you’ll be leading something goes terribly awry and you accidently go off that overpass, at least you’ll be in one piece when you’re incarcerated – ’cause this baby is outfitted with a rollcage, Sparco Evo racing seat, and 5-point Simpson harness. Hear that lion roaring under the hood? That is 2.6 liters of double camshafted, turbocharged adrenaline. The whole thing has been gone through by Auto Edge Racing. We are talking over $7,000 in racing upgrades.

She is the real deal with a 5 speed rear mounted transmission handling all that power through a high performance puck clutch with less than 10,000 miles on the clutch. Don’t show up expecting to test drive this beauty unless you know how to drive a manual & have cash in hand.

So, you’re ready to have this white stallion in your stable? Then you better be willing to fork over $11,000 american. Or if you have a blue water sailboat in the caribbean I’d be willing to swap.

Shoot me an email and we can set up a meeting.



This post first appeared on Dave Knows Cars Mercedes Benz Collector Cars, please read the originial post: here

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Awesome Classified: 1986 Porsche 944 Turbo Will, Apparently, Change Your Life

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