This 29-year-old man and his Wife, 31, married three years ago after dating for two years. When they first began dating, they talked about kids.
He told her he’d be content having or not having kids, adding that he’d only be willing to have kids with someone he viewed as a great partner. His wife was happy with his answer, telling him she’d never been interested in becoming a mother.
Three years into their marriage, his wife dropped a bomb that she had a new outlook and wanted to have Children with him. He adores and deeply loves his wife, but he feels like she’d be an awful parent.
“She’s not patient. She tends to get frustrated easily with people who are not as smart as her (she’s very smart), and she finds it hard to explain her thought process,” he said.
In addition, his wife takes constant work trips and loves going on vacation with him. Because of that, they aren’t home all the time. Throughout their relationship, he realized that his wife didn’t have good money management skills.
They each earn impressive salaries, so it’s not too big of a deal if she spends a lot of money. However, he pointed out that if they had children, they would have to budget more carefully, especially if one of them had to stop working to care for their children.
“She’s never been good with kids. She has some nieces and nephews. They call me ‘the fun uncle,’ and they all think my wife is scary. She never plays with them and gets mad at them for being loud,” he explained.
Since he’d told his wife years ago that he’d be willing to have children, she assumed he’d be on board to start having kids with her. But he expressed, as kindly as possible, that he didn’t believe she’d be a great mom.
His answer infuriated her, and as they discussed the issue, he listed off the reasons he was concerned about what type of parent she’d be.
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“My wife says she’ll change and knows she’ll become better with kids. She promises to change her travel and spending habits, but I just don’t think I want to gamble with a child’s upbringing,” he shared.
After they argued about whether or not to have children, he doesn’t know what to think. Upon reflection, he acknowledged that having kids would be fantastic, but he doesn’t trust that his wife would be a good mother.
What advice would you give him?
You can read the original post on Reddit here.
