This 29-year-old woman thinks that she is a well-adjusted, successful person. She has a bunch of great friends, a wonderful family, and plenty of hobbies.

She is also quite good at her job as a resident doctor and doesn’t have many characteristics that society tends to “judge harshly,” or that might cause her to struggle when building relationships.

Yet, at the age of 29, she has never so much as kissed another human being– let alone have a relationship or engage in any kind of physical affection.

“I’m not particularly good-looking, but I’m not like offensive to the eyes or anything,” she said.

Still, she has not had her first kiss– not even like an elementary school romance or anything like that.

Sure, she has been on dates with two different people before. The first date was with a good friend who, on paper, seemed perfect for her. But, after actually going out with them, she didn’t feel any physical attraction to her friend.

And the second person she went on a date with happened to be a friend of a friend who she liked in the beginning. However, the person wound up having a lot of baggage from past relationships that got in the way.

So, aside from these two people, she feels like the theme of her personal life has simply been “indifference.”

Less than ten people have ever expressed interest in her, and she feels like people just never give her a second thought.

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As a teen, she was never asked out for any school dances and was rarely invited to parties. Instead, she was always the last one out of her friend group, left alone, getting asked to dance by annoying drunk guys at the bar.

And aside from this personally upsetting her since she wants a romance, she also feels like her lack of experience is negatively impacting her relationships with friends.

Apparently, it just makes her seem like she is being secretive and doesn’t want to let other people into her life.

For instance, if a friend is chatting about a past relationship or laughing about a bad date, the conversation will naturally hit a lull. And at that point, she should, in theory, jump in to share her perspective or one of her own past experiences.

But, she simply has nothing to say ever and always has to try and push the conversation in a different direction.

“I know it makes me seem withholding or even judgemental, but the alternative is to just tell them,” she explained.

“And in my experience, that has either sucked all the air out of the room as they try to be overly polite and act like they don’t think it’s weird as hell, or they still think I’m being secretive and I’m just trolling them.”

Being that she is bi, she feels like this causes her friends to distrust her, too. Apparently, her gay friends believe that she is “just a closeted lesbian.” She feels as though her straight friends probably agree, too.

And one of the people she went out on a date with was a woman who wound up asking her if her parents knew that she dated girls.

In response, she detailed how she “awkwardly” said something like, “They don’t know that I date anyone.”

Now, that is true, but she thinks that it makes it seem as though she is hiding her orientation from her parents as opposed to the truth– which is that there is absolutely nothing to tell them.

It also doesn’t help that she hates using dating apps because she simply feels gross when judging other people based on such little information provided in dating profiles. And the idea of “pitching” herself to other people makes her feel even worse.

So, she has asked some friends to set her up with Potential Partners. But, most of the time, they don’t know anyone who would be a good fit for her, or the potential partners live super far away or are too old.

That’s why her friends have forced her to try out dating apps more recently. But she really just does not like it, or the idea that she could waste her little free time as a resident meeting up with a stranger who turns out to be a total jerk.

“I really just feel like I’ve missed the boat– like I’ve never had the formative experiences or gained the skills to actually be able to enter a relationship,” she vented.

“And that sucks because I think I could be a pretty [great] partner if I could just get to that point.”

Can you understand how having no romantic experiences can make her feel alienated in other parts of her life? How can she meet new people without relying on friends or dating apps? What other advice would you give her?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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