After this 23-year-old woman became separated from her ex-husband, she was left to care for a household all by herself. On top of that, she took on most of the care for her young son.

Then, she decided to dip her toe back into the dating pool and wound up meeting her current boyfriend– who she has been dating for 11 months.

They apparently connected instantly, and her boyfriend wound up staying at her place every night and every weekend when he was not working. He simply liked her home more since he lived in a house shared with other people.

And at that point, she wanted to impress her boyfriend– as well as show him love. That’s why she started washing his clothes, cleaning, and cooking for him– despite the fact that it added more stress to her plate.

Still, in the beginning, her boyfriend was treating her regularly. He would take her on dates and buy her little items and flowers. So, she felt like she needed to put the same effort back in for him.

By that point in their relationship, however, the expectation of her providing for him had already been set. Her boyfriend would even come over every single night and ask her, “What’s for dinner?” or, “Have you washed my clothes?”

As time went on, she wound up watching as her savings plummeted since she would be forced to buy extra groceries to accommodate her boyfriend in addition to herself and her son. Her boyfriend also started taking food to work with him for lunch and helping himself to her fridge whenever he was hungry.

So, she slowly started having to go grocery shopping more frequently. Yet, even when her boyfriend went along, he would toss items into the cart and never offer to pay for them.

Her boyfriend would also make comments whenever she put a few grocery items back or picked out budget options– making her feel like a cheapskate.

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And while he was well aware that she had to stick to a weekly budget for her expenses, he would still make snide remarks.

“The only way he ever bought groceries was if I requested he picks something up for me, and I’d only ask for a few inexpensive items,” she said.

Aside from food expenses, her boyfriend also started to run up her utility bills. He would only shower at her house, even if he stopped by his place before coming over. And despite her constantly reminding him to be more mindful, he would repeatedly leave lights on around her house.

Her reminders then caused her boyfriend to keep making her feel cheap. He also claimed that if his behavior bothered her so much, then he would pay the bills.

Yet, whenever the bills actually showed up, he would not even mention it– leaving her with increasing sums to pay.

In terms of household chores, her boyfriend never pitched in, either. He would frequently leave his clothes, dishes, and other messes lying around. And rather than stepping in to help her tidy up, he would just sit on his phone and watch her clean everything.

Now, she did want to clarify that she is not exactly in a place of financial struggle. Instead, she has a decent amount of savings. But her boyfriend is well aware of that, causing her to think that he just doesn’t believe his behavior matters.

She also just felt awkward asking her boyfriend to help out with the bills, and she didn’t want him to think that he was moving into her house– even though he was there every night already.

So, she would just make passing comments about how the cost of living is rising and leading to increased bills. After that, her boyfriend would sometimes offer to help out financially. But she didn’t really act on the offers.

“I would awkwardly say, ‘That’s okay, just make up for it in other ways,'” she recalled.

“But I felt that the added stresses and costs weren’t worth the small things he would occasionally do for me.”

That’s why, as time went on, resentment built up inside of her, and she started to become passive-aggressive. After all, she felt like her boyfriend was always offering to help yet never actually made any effort to follow through.

Her boyfriend started to catch on to the fact that she was unhappy and stressed out, too. Yet, he would try to hold simple tasks– such as doing the dishes once a week or helping out with his own laundry– over her head.

Then, he would just claim that he was a “good man,” attempting to take some stress off of her shoulders when, in reality, he just added to her stress load.

At one point, he even told her about one of his old girlfriends and swore that he had been the one paying for all of the food and bills. Plus, he claimed to have done all of the cleaning and cooking.

“He expressed that he felt his ex took advantage of him– which I find hard to imagine, as he doesn’t do this stuff for me,” she explained.

“And I wonder if he is even telling the truth or if she experienced the same as me.”

Anyway, they eventually got into a fight about an unrelated topic, and she decided to cut him off for a week. Then, once they started talking again, her boyfriend made it seem as though he had really changed.

He started buying her gifts and taking her on dates again. He also started buying groceries sometimes, cooking every few nights, and cleaning more.

“It was not perfect, but it sure was so much better than what I had been through with him prior,” she revealed.

So, after two months of these improvements, she wound up asking her boyfriend to officially move in. She felt like enough time had passed and that his efforts would just continue improving.

But unfortunately, he moved in not too long ago and has already gone back to his old ways. Over the past month, the only groceries her boyfriend has purchased have been his own snacks and enough food for a couple of dinners.

She, on the other hand, still has to buy all of the household items, food staples, condiments, and ingredients for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. On top of that, she is also trying to care for her son.

“I don’t know where to go from here because he knows it affects me,” she revealed.

“When he came back, he changed his behavior to win me back. So he knows his behavior is problematic.”

Yet, whenever she tries talking to him about the issues, the conversations never lead anywhere.

She even tried to set up an arrangement where she would handle all of the food and cleaning as long as her boyfriend either sent her money or shopped for his own items each week. While he agreed to that arrangement at the time, though, he has never actually held up his end.

“And we just continue the way it’s always been– with me feeling like I’m getting the short end of the stick, and he saves his money although he already earns twice my income,” she vented.

So now, she feels extremely stuck and has been left wondering how to set boundaries and move forward in her relationship.

Does it sound like she has a boyfriend or just another child to take care of? Should she have set firm boundaries a long time ago rather than allowing him to take advantage of her? Regardless, how can she handle this situation now? What would you do?

You can read the original post on Reddit here.

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