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Book on Attachment Styles

Tags: attachment

How to Recognise Attachment and Ultimately Let it Go

I wrote a book about Attachment. Why? Because it’s what holds a lot of you guys back. Attachment in any way, shape or form is not constructive.

Even if you are not into the law of attraction this is a fact. Attachment means needing. Wanting is not attachment. Desiring something but knowing that you don’t need it is a whole other ball-game. A rather more pleasant one actually!

When we attach our happiness to something or someone we are giving away our amazing power. We are looking for something outside of ourself to bring us something that we feel we don’t already possess. Our own happiness is ours alone to give. No one person can ever live up to an expectation like that. If you decide that you need that one person to make you complete, you are piling one hell of a lot of pressure on them and who can live up to that?

Basic Attachment Theory

Some of the earliest theories suggested that attachment was simply a learned behaviour. These theories proposed that attachment was merely the result of the feeding relationship between the child and the caregiver. Because the caregiver feeds the child and provides nourishment, the child becomes attached.

This is attachment in its most basic form. It’s not something that applies to the law of attraction but the feeling is much the same. When it comes to an ex for example: You may feel distraught at losing your partner. Perhaps they ended your relationship and for you there are still invisible ties that bind you to them and you have no idea how to cut those ties. Then you learn about manifesting them back. So you put all of your energy into doing that because why lose them when you can simply bring them back?

There is no ‘simply’ when it comes to people unfortunately. Attachment to people is the worst kind and the hardest to budge. The more we try the more attached we become.

Can You Get Over Attachment and Let Go?

Absolutely you can! First though, you must recognise your attachment. Accept that you are attached and don’t feel bad or embarrassed about it. It’s natural, it’s not just you. Often we don’t like to accept it because we think it makes us weak and we don’t want to be that person. So we go on pretending that we are okay. But that means most likely, detachment will always elude us. At least until we meet someone else or throw our hands up in frustration and finally let go. But why wait until then? letting go is an art granted, but with practise it can be done. You just need to pin-point your attachment and make a decision to deal with it.

Degrees of Attachment Book by Evie Sparkes

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