Kate Rudolph, $3.99, ISBN 978-1005423346
Sci-fi Romance, 2021

Sometimes I put myself in the place of a romance heroine and wonder: if an alien beam down from the sky, looking like the hunk of hunks, and tell me that I need to have hot alien sex with him in order to bear him a child or 20, will I be thrilled?

Hmm, I don’t know if I would, as I will have some concerns about what kind of monstrosity the offspring will be, how abnormal the pregnancy will be, and whether the baby will pop out in a shower of gore after a painful labor.

Let’s just say that three minutes of hot humping don’t seem like much of a compensation for having weird who-knows-what alien seed take root inside my womb.

With the hero Crux being a shape-shifting dragon… yikes. Will the baby look like those aliens from V?

Prince Crux grinned at his brothers, Saber and Ranger, and beckoned them forward with the claws on his hand. His armor was up and fire raged inside of him, ready to burst free.

Claws, huh? If my thighs weren’t clamped shut already, they sure are now!

I guess I’m just not the right target audience for this thing, as I’m not into copulating in fursuits, much less one of Puff the Magic Dragon.

Naturally, the only woman that will say yes and part her legs like the Red Sea in response to the hero waving his god-given staff will be a desperate, vulnerable, sorry sort that will normally make TikTok videos crying about how triggering real life is.

That’s Courtney Lamb. She’s been kidnapped by slavers, and is subsequently rescued by Crux.

Of course, it’s way too much work to show convincingly how a human woman would willingly put out to a dragon, so on his part, it’s instant-mate time while on her part… well, he’s her rescuer and he’s hot. What other reason will any woman need to put out in such a situation?

Now, the good stuff first. The author tries to expand Crux’s conflicted emotions a bit more than the usual “I just know she’s my mate, it’s pump-pump time!” stuff this genre is rife is. Sure, this only brings the story into the familiar “I probably shouldn’t go for such a vulnerable damsel in distress, but she needs my protection so I can’t just kick her to the curb, and this is just making me horny so oh, the pain of my blue testicles!” territory, but at least the author does something.

The author also includes some action-y subplot to let Crux and his siblings flex for the readers, and it’s a nice distraction from the cringe-infused tropes dragging down the romance. Sure, there isn’t anything particularly remarkable about the subplot, and it also sidelines the heroine further to make her even more of protection-needy walking carbon composite of big fun bags and sizzling honey pot, but hey, this is a shifter romance and my expectations are low enough as they are; I’ll take whatever I can get.

Also, the narrative is enjoyable to read. I like that there is a balance between one-liners and more vulnerable moments, because the tropes already make my eyes roll like a pair of dice in a busy casino as it is, and I don’t think they can withstand even more of the torture.

On the downside, the author hasn’t done enough to make the tropes less cringe-inducing or eye-roll worthy. This one is still what it is, for better or worse, and I just have to feel some kind of relief that I manage to chuckle once or twice in spite of the entire premise, the hero, and the heroine all not pinging on my “Aww, this is so sweet!” radar even once.

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