Abstinence, in a general sense, means refraining from doing something we want to do. For a Christian, Abstinence usually involves obeying God and refraining from doing things he has told us are harmful to us. But sometimes, abstinence can also mean giving up something for a period of time (even something good) in order to more completely focus on God. 

These days, abstinence is a highly ignored discipline in many cultures. Many people feel that abstinence cramps their freedom. but that is a distortion of the truth. Refraining from harmful behaviors really results in freedom – freedom from fear, disease, addiction, and other painful consequences. Abstinence, therefore, is substituting short-term pleasure (and its long-term consequences) for long-term joy (by giving up some short-term pleasure). Abstinence is the discipline of refraining from one thing in order to more fully and continuously experience something better.

Why should I abstain?

Romans 6:12-13

Do not let sin control the way you live; do not give in to sinful desires. Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God.

2 Timothy 2:4

Soldiers don’t get tied up in the affairs of civilian life, for then they cannot please the officer who enlisted them.

Abstinence can be a way to strengthen our thankfulness, devotion, and obedience to the Lord.

Esther 4:15-16

Then Esther sent this reply to Mordecai: “Go and gather together all the Jews of Susa and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. My maids and I will do the same. And then, though it is against the law, I will go in to see the king. 

Joel 1:14

Announce a time of fasting; call the people together for a solemn meeting. Bring the leaders and all the people of the land into the Temple of the Lord your God, and cry out to him there.

1 Corinthians 7:5

Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Abstaining from food and drink in the form of a fast can help you focus more intentionally on God and help you more clearly discern what he wants to tell you.

Romans 14:6

Those who worship the Lord on a special day do it to honor him. Those who eat any kind of food do so to honor the Lord, since they give thanks to God before eating. And those who refuse to eat certain foods also want to please the Lord and give thanks to God.

1 Corinthians 7:5

Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Abstinence can be pleasing to the Lord as a way to show our thankfulness and devotion to him, as well as our obedience.

1 Corinthians 6:15, 19

Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself,

Ephesians 5:18

Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, be filled with the Holy Spirit,

Proverbs 28:7

Young people who obey the law are wise; those with wild friends bring shame to their parents.

Romans 12:2

Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Proverbs 4:23

Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.

Since our bodies are temples of the Spirit of God, we must be careful what we allow to enter it. We don’t want to profane God’s temple with the misuse of food, alcohol, sex, drugs, or even our thoughts. Eating is an enjoyable daily experience God has given us, yet overindulging can become an unhealthy addiction. Jesus himself created wine for a wedding celebration, but drinking in excess weakens our self-control and harms our health. Sex within marriage is good and healthy for that relationship, but lust seeks selfish pleasure and leaves wrecked and hollow relationships in its wake. Whether we abstain to grow our self-control, to avoid a common temptation, or to wait for when the time is right, our abstinence shows respect to the temple in our care.

Romans 14:21

It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything else if it might cause another believer to stumble.

1 Corinthians 8:13

So if what I eat causes another believer to sin, I will never eat meat again as long as I live—for I don’t want to cause another believer to stumble.

Abstinence may be necessary to keep someone else from stumbling in their relationship with God. It may be necessary, at times, to stay away from things that might cause someone who looks to you for guidance to go against their conscience. For instance, if a friend is a recovering alcoholic who abstains from alcohol, choosing not to drink alcoholic beverages in his presence could show respect for his conscience.

Romans 12:1-2

And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice-the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him. [2] Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

James 1:17

Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow.

Matthew 7:11

So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.

When we allow our thoughts and lives to be directed by God’s will, rather than the world’s ways, we will grow to realize how good, pleasing, and perfect God’s desires are. Yes, he wants us to abstain from some enticing sins, but only so he can give us much better pleasures in return. God is the source of all good gifts.

From what should I abstain? 

1 John 5:21

Dear children, keep away from anything that might take God’s place in your hearts.

We are called to abstain from anyone, or anything, that replaces God as the first priority in our lives. God desires a heart totally devoted to him.

1 Thessalonians 5:22

Stay away from every kind of evil.

Psalm 119:101

I have refused to walk on any evil path, so that I may remain obedient to your word.

1 Peter 2:11

Dear friends, I warn you as “temporary residents and foreigners” to keep away from worldly desires that wage war against your very souls.

Colossians 3:5, 8

So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don’t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world . . . But now is the time to get rid of anger, rage, malicious behavior, slander, and dirty language.

Psalm 101:4

I will reject perverse ideas and stay away from every evil.

Abstain from sin as much as humanly possible – from both sinful thoughts and actions. A heart that allows thoughts of evil, lust, anger, rage, or impurity to linger is a heart that will draw you into greater sin.

1 Thessalonians 4:3

God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.

Abstain from sexual sin, both before marriage and after. This is essential in a marriage relationship where faithfulness and trust are critical to the bond of unity God intended between a husband and wife.

Proverbs 14:7

Stay away from fools, for you won’t find knowledge on their lips.

2 Timothy 3:5

They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!

Proverbs 22:24-25

Don’t befriend angry people or associate with hot-tempered people, or you will learn to be like them and endanger your soul.

1 Corinthians 5:11

I meant that you are not to associate with anyone who claims to be a believer yet indulges in sexual sin, or is greedy, or worships idols, or is abusive, or is a drunkard, or cheats people. Don’t even eat with such people.

Psalm 26:4-5

I do not spend time with liars or go along with hypocrites. I hate the gatherings of those who do evil, and I refuse to join in with the wicked.

1 Timothy 5:22

Do not share in the sins of others. Keep yourself pure.

We should abstain from keeping “bad company” for our own souls’ protection. Bad company often leads to bad conduct. Though witnessing requires interacting with neighbors who may not live by God’s standards, we must be careful to ask ourselves, “Are they becoming more like me, or am I becoming more like them?”

How do I practice abstinence? What happens when I don’t?

Romans 13:14

Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires.

Colossians 3:7, 9, 11

You used to do these things when your life was still part of this world . . . you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds . . . In this new life . . . Christ is all that matters, and he lives in all of us.

1 John 3:9

Those who have been born into God’s family do not make a practice of sinning, because God’s life is in them. So they can’t keep on sinning, because they are children of God.

Abstinence is possible through the power of the Holy Spirit, God’s gift to every Christian. The more we make a place for the Holy Spirit, the less space we have for sinful, harmful influences.

2 Peter 1:6

Supplement your faith with a generous provision of moral excellence, and moral excellence with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with patient endurance, and patient endurance with godliness, and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love for everyone.

Proverbs 25:28

A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls.

1 Peter 1:13

So prepare your minds for action and exercise self-control. Put all your hope in the gracious salvation that will come to you when Jesus Christ is revealed to the world.

Self-control is a key to abstinence, and it is a result of getting to know God! Devotion to God enables us to think more clearly with an eternal perspective, make better choices, and therefore have greater control over our actions.

Psalm 36:1

Sin whispers to the wicked, deep within their hearts. They have no fear of God at all.

Titus 2:12

And we are instructed to turn from godless living and sinful pleasures. We should live in this evil world with wisdom, righteousness, and devotion to God.

Proverbs 16:6

Unfailing love and faithfulness make atonement for sin. By fearing the Lord, people avoid evil.

Mark 12:30

And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.'

John 4:15

"Please, sir," the woman said, "give me this water! Then I'll never be thirsty again, and I won't have to come here to get water."

1 Timothy 6:11

But you, Timothy, are a man of God; so run from all these evil things. Pursue righteousness and a godly life, along with faith, love, perseverance, and gentleness.

Developing our Love and respect for God helps us abstain from wrong. Godliness is not just staying away from evil; it is pursuing God. As we grow in our hunger for God, the allure of sin will grow pale in comparison, and we will find joy in imitating God’s goodness in our daily lives.

Proverbs 4:15

Don’t even think about it; don’t go that way. Turn away and keep moving.

Proverbs 4:24

Avoid all perverse talk; stay away from corrupt speech.

There are times when the best way to practice abstinence is to physically remove ourselves from a tempting situation.

1 Corinthians 6:9-11

Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God. Some of you were once like that. But you were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

Romans 6:6

We know that our old sinful selves were crucified with Christ so that sin might lose its power in our lives. We are no longer slaves to sin.

Colossians 3:1

Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God's right hand.

Romans 8:29

For God knew his people in advance, and he chose them to become like his Son, so that his Son would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.

1 John 2:6

Those who say they live in God should live their lives as Jesus did.

Philippians 1:6

And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.

1 Thessalonians 4:3

God's will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.

A lifestyle of indulging in sin has eternal consequences. When we make a practice of sin – when we consistently and willfully disobey God’s Word — we are rebelling against God. When we try to abstain from sin, we are showing our desire to please God by showing our respect for his Word and his ways. God and sin cannot live side by side in the inner places of our hearts. Christ died on the cross not only to save us from the punishment for our sins, but from our enslavement to our sins. He died so we could be free to follow him and become all we were made to be—righteous, sanctified children of God. Abstaining from sin is a part of the sanctification process, a strengthening of our spiritual muscles that helps us grow more like Christ.

What are the dangers of not abstaining?

Proverbs 5:23

He will die for lack of self-control; he will be lost because of his great foolishness.

Proverbs 25:28

A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls.

We become vulnerable when we act without self-control. We control our hands and feet best when we control the mind and heart.

What are the benefits of abstinence?

James 1:25

But if you look carefully into the perfect law that sets you free, and if you do what it says and don’t forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it.

James 1:12

God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

Abstaining from sin brings God’s blessings.

Romans 6:1-2, 13

Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God.

Abstaining from sin is a way to develop and show our devotion to God. It is impossible to cling to a sinful lifestyle and please a holy God at the same time.

Hebrews 13:4

Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.

Abstaining from sexual activity before marriage provides great blessings of trust and intimacy to you and your spouse after marriage. Once you are married, the self-control built during pre-marital abstinence also serves well as a guard against adultery.

Matthew 6:24

"No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money.

Hebrews 13:5

Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.”

Greed offers false promises of fulfillment and security. Abstaining from this temptation opens our hearts to experience the never-ending satisfaction of being close to God.

What are the benefits of abstinence?

James 1:25

But if you look carefully into the perfect law that sets you free, and if you do what it says and don’t forget what you heard, then God will bless you for doing it.

James 1:12

God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

Abstaining from sin brings God’s blessings.

Romans 6:1-2, 13

Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God.

Abstaining from sin is a way to develop and show our devotion to God. It is impossible to cling to a sinful lifestyle and please a holy God at the same time.

Hebrews 13:4

Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.

Abstaining from sexual activity before marriage provides great blessings of trust and intimacy to you and your spouse after marriage. Once you are married, the self-control built during pre-marital abstinence also serves well as a guard against adultery.

Matthew 6:24

"No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money.

Hebrews 13:5

Don’t love money; be satisfied with what you have. For God has said, “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.”

Greed offers false promises of fulfillment and security. Abstaining from this temptation opens our hearts to experience the never-ending satisfaction of being close to God.

Promise from God

Galatians 5:22-23

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

Proverbs 25:28

A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls.

James 1:17

Whatever is good and perfect is a gift coming down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow.